


maybe this time

by portlandtosaltlake



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: F/F, Multi Characters, Very AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-10
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2020-11-28 19:01:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 40,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20971481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/portlandtosaltlake/pseuds/portlandtosaltlake
Summary: Moving in with her half-brother, Christen had no idea what to expect.But nothing could have prepared her for this.Her brother's friends are wild, protective, secretive, always around.Out of all of them, there's something about Tobin Heath.Brooding, temperamental, guarded...And she wants her more than anything she's ever wanted in her entire life.





	1. "you're gonna be trouble, i can tell"

**Author's Note:**

> hello all, i'm back! for those who remember this story, i'm sorry for leaving you all hanging. as i'm sure some of you understand, life got crazy and i really stopped writing all together and i even deleted it because i truly thought i was done with writing for good. but of course once in a blue moon a world cup occurs and i get sucked back in. i will be posting chapters once a week, i hope. the reason to that is i lost a lot of the story (specifically the latter half) when my computer broke. like i said before though, i've had a good time falling back in love with this story and i'm still trying to figure out if i want to rework it and change some things or not. anywhooo! for those patient enough to read through this mess, thank you. i promise i'm trying my best.
> 
> and to the first-time readers- hi!!! i hope you enjoy!

Christen watches him as he exits the jail. He’s tall and muscular, with a familiar head of dark brown hair. His stride is confident; sure. A smile quirks his full lips when he approaches, and he instantly quickens his pace.

Christen just stands there, observing him. He steps right in front of her, as she stares into brown eyes that are so different from her own green.

“Christen,” he says, his eyes crinkling with warmth.

Christen huffs out a sigh, but falls into his embrace the second he opens his arms to her. Christen squeezes him tight, not wanting to let go.

“About time you came home,” he says, rubbing her back.

Christen resists the urge to correct him and tell him this isn’t home. Instead, she pulls back with a guilty smile. A million things start to run through her head. _If mom was alive, she wouldn't want her to be here._

“I know,” is all she says in response. He reads her like a book.

“You don’t have to feel guilty, Chris. Come on, let’s get out of here.”

Christen nods, watching as her brother, Servando, gets into her car.

***

“Are you going to tell me why I had to pick you up from jail?” Christen can’t stop herself from asking.

“Misunderstanding,” is all Servando tells her. She frowns, then decides it’s a little late for her to play the big sister role, so she doesn’t ask him anything else. Instead she sighs, and asks him for directions to his place.

Servando is only a year younger than Christen, but this is the first time she’s met him in person. Christen can’t help from glancing at him from the corner of her eye every now and again, taking in his every movement, his every feature. His hair is long and he’s covered in tattoos. His knuckles are split open, like he’d gotten into a fight recently.

“You might wanna keep your eyes on the road,” he says, amusement lacing his tone. Christen doesn’t answer him, but turns her head forward. The rest of the drive is quiet.

“Turn left here, and keep going,” he instructs. “Right here, Chris. Third house on the left,” he says, pointing.

“Okay. Dad won’t be here, will he?” She asks quietly after they pull up in the driveway to a large brick house. It surprises her. _Not what I was expecting at all._

Servando flashes her an unreadable look. “No, he’s not here.” Christen exhales in relief. No way is she ready to see him just yet.

“Open the back and I’ll get your bags,” Servando offers. Christen complies.

She leans against her car, playing with the rips in her distressed jeans as he takes out the bags.

Servando starts to walk towards the house, then turns around when he realizes she’s not following him, and raises an eyebrow in question.

Christen reluctantly takes a step towards the house. Towards her new life. _Temporary _new life, or so she’s been telling herself. Servando opens the door wide for her to enter, and she hesitantly steps in behind him.

This is the house the that Servando grew up in, with their father. Christen winces.

She’s never stepped foot inside of it until today. Her greedy eyes take every detail in, until her gaze stops on Servando watching her closely.

“Your room is the first on the right.” Christen doesn’t know what he saw when he looked at her, but it caused him to soften.

“Okay,” Christen says, heading towards her room.

“I’ll go out and get us some dinner. Make yourself at home, Chris,” she hears him say from behind her.

She nods, even though he can’t see it.

The house might be older, but inside it looks modern and welcoming. Her room is spacious, especially compared to her old room. Her mother may have been financially stable but there was just the two of them, so they shared a three bedroom apartment. It was in a good area, but the rooms weren’t large like the one she was standing in right now. The bed is a queen size, surrounded by a wooden headboard and side tables. There’s a dressing table with a huge mirror, and two sets of drawers. Opening the wardrobe, Christen finds more drawers, and space to hang her clothes. A lot of space. There’s an unopened set of pink sheets for the bed in the cupboard, along with a new comforter and pillows. Christen grins, imagining Servando shopping for these items for her.

After a long shower, Christen dries herself and ties her long, dark hair up in a messy bun. Wrapping the towel around herself, she walks from the bathroom back to her bedroom.

She’s almost to her bedroom door when she screams.

She pulls her towel higher, and takes a few steps back, looking around for a weapon. Anything.

“Fuck, I’m sorry. I’m not gonna hurt you,” comes an amused drawl. He puts his hands up in a calming gesture.

“Who are you?” Christen demands, narrowing her eyes.

“Dom!” Christen hears Servando call out as he walks around the corner. He pauses when he sees them, and shoots a glare at Dom.

“What the fuck are you doing staring at my sister like that?” Servando practically growls. Christen looks at Dom, who is indeed eyeing her, and not being subtle about it one bit. Dom throws a crooked smile Christen’s way, before turning his violet colored eyes at Servando.

“You didn’t tell me how hot your sister was,” he says in a deep rumble.

“She’s off limits. To you and every other guy out there, actually. She’s into chicks.”

Christen opens her mouth to correct him but then closes it. She's not _not_ into guys. She's open to anything, really, but she figures Servando is saying this probably for her long-term benefit. 

Dom looks confused for a moment, before a suggestive smirk takes place on his face. Christen rolls her eyes and walks around him and into her room, closing the door behind her. She hears his masculine chuckle, along with Servando hissing something about Dom keeping his dick in his pants.

Christen dresses in worn jeans and a blank tank top and heads out into the kitchen. She sees Servando and Dom in what looks like a heated conversation, all hushed whispers and hand gestures. Feeling a little awkward, Christen almost wants to head back into her room.

“Come and eat, Chris,” Servando says when he sees her. He pushes a pizza box towards her, and Christen notices some beers on the table. Christen opens the box and takes out a giant slice.

“Does Jack know she’s here?” Dom asks Servando, his eyes glued to Christen. Servando runs his hand through his hair, looking a little worried.

When Servando called Christen, asking her to move in here with him, she told him she was reluctant because of their father. He doesn’t know her, at all, and it feels awkward that he would suddenly want to be in her life after all these years with only making an appearance once a year at most. The truth was, Christen wanted to be with Servando. She’d wanted to know him her whole life, and when he called her, telling her that if she didn’t get here he was gonna drive down there to get her himself, she decided it was time. Time to break free.

There was no point staying at home anymore, in her small rental apartment where her mom and her used to live. So she quit her waitressing job and left everything and everyone she’d known her whole life behind. All for her brother.

“Yeah, he knows,” Servando answers, his tone and look telling Dom to shut up. Christen looks at Dom. She wasn’t gonna lie, he’s ruggedly handsome. Not exactly her type, though.

She sees a matching pair of dimples pop up when he flashes her a flirty smile. She rolls her eyes at him, feigning non-interest.

“How long are you here for?” Dom asks, picking up his own slice of pizza.

“Forever,” Servando says, the same time Christen answers “not long.”

Servando pins her with a harsh glare. “What do you mean not long? This is your house, too!”

“No, it isn’t, Servando,” Christen says softly. This is his house, and his alone. She knows her father gave it to him. She wants to spend time with her brother, and get on her feet, then she can find her own place to live.

“Christen, you have to know that-”

“It doesn’t matter. I don’t want to be in your way,” she tells him, cutting him off.

“Is it because all that shit your mom said about me? You don’t think that you’re safe here?” he asks her, his voice mocking, but his eyes shine with hurt. Her whole life her mother has had nothing but horrible things to say about her father and that included Servando. She tried her best to turn Christen against Servando and her father, tried to instill it into her from the beginning. Christen doesn’t think Servando cares about what her mother thinks, but from the look in his brown eyes she can see that he _does _care about what Christen thinks.

“If I listened to what my mom said I wouldn’t be here right now, Servando,” she tells him truthfully. He shakes his head, staring down at his feet in annoyance. Dom is watching him, a thoughtful look on his face. The two of them eye each other, almost like they are having a private conversation. Christen shrugs, grabs a beer and heads to the couch, turning on the TV.

“How old are you?” Dom asks her.

Christen takes a slow sip of her beer before she replies. “What’s it to you?”

“Serv is twenty-two, so you must be, what, twenty-three?”

“And how old are you?” Christen asks.

“Older,” is all he says. Christen gives him a once over. She’d say he’s about twenty-five.

“You must be, what, thirty?” She asks, pursing her lips so she doesn’t laugh when she sees his reaction.

He narrows his eyes. “I don’t look that old.”

“Of course not,” she replies, dragging the words out.

Dom opens his mouth to say something else, when two girls walk into the house.

_Does no one even knock? Or believe in locking doors?_

Christen peers up at them, surprised to see that they are twins. Identical twins. Both have light brown hair, and bright, brown eyes with tan skin. _Damn. _The only difference Christen can spot between them is the scar one of them has, marring the right side of her cheek. It looks like it might have been made by a knife, and runs deep along her jawline.

“Anyone ever tell you it’s rude to stare?” the scarred twin says with a growl.

“Tobin,” the other twin says, a warning in her tone.

“Christen, this is Tobin and Ryan,” Servando introduces as he sits down on the couch opposite Christen.

“This is your sister? Holy fuck,” Ryan says with a smile. Tobin just glares at Christen, brooding. _She seems...charming._

“Yeah, and she’s off limits,” Servando says, his eyes on the TV.

“Where’s the fun in that?” Ryan says, sitting down next to Christen. She nudges Christen playfully with her elbow, and Christen can’t help it when her lips curve into a smile.

“Nice to meet you, Ryan,” Christen tells her. And she means it. Ryan may seem flirty but Christen can tell she’s harmless. Tobin, on the other hand, let’s just say Christen wouldn’t wanna meet that chick in a dark alley anytime soon.

“Jack said we all gotta be at the warehouse in an hour,” Tobin says, still standing, her well-defined arms crossed against her chest.

“Warehouse?” Christen repeats, looking at Servando for answers. Christen eyes all of them warily.

And they all ignore her.

“Alright, we’ll be there, don’t worry,” Servando says, looking at Tobin.

“He wants us _all _there,” Tobin says, looking straight at Christen.

“I’m not going anywhere.” Christen crosses her arms over her chest in protest.

“Just fucking great,” Tobin mutters, her eyes darting to Servando.

“What?” Christen asks.

“Of course you’d be an uptight princess,” Tobin says, looking pissed off.

Christen blinks once. “Fuck you,” she draws out each word.

“No, thanks,” Tobin replies, standing there with her feet shoulder width apart, arms crossed.

Christen’s eyes widen at her response. “I’ll take you up on that offer,” Ryan says, scowling at Tobin before flashing Christen a charming smile and a wink.

“Can you guys not chase her away, please?” Servando says, rubbing his hand down his face.

Something works behind Tobin’s eyes. “Let’s get ready to head out.”

Taking that as her cue to leave, Christen stands up and heads to her room. She closes the door quietly, although she wants nothing more than to slam it with all her might. She lies down in her bed, pulling out a book.

***

**Tobin**

_Jack’s daughter is hot._

_No, she’s beautiful. Of course she’s fucking beautiful._

_Jack’s told us we need to treat her like she’s family. Protect her._

_And sure as hell not fuck her. I think my body needs to get the memo, though. Fast._

_She’s into girls, but that doesn’t mean she wants you, _Tobin reminds herself.

“Stop being a bitch to her,” Servando warns, causing Tobin’s lip to twitch.

“Jack wants to see her,” Tobin tells Servando. She glances toward what she assumes is the door to Christen’s room. She sees Ryan eyeing her curiously, and Tobin hates that her sister knows her so well.

“I’m not gonna force her to go, she just got here,” Servando narrows his eyes at Tobin. He loves his sister, that much is clear. Tobin knows Christen and he don’t know each other all too well, but Jack told her that Servando had managed to write and call Christen over the years. Her mom was some vindictive bitch that wouldn’t let them near Christen, ever since Jack cheated on her. Not only did Jack cheat but the woman, Stephanie, got pregnant with Servando. Christen’s mom was pissed and took Christen away for good. There’s probably more to the story, but that’s all that Tobin knows.

“Tell Jack I’ll bring her when she’s ready, he’ll understand,” Servando says.

“Fine, you explain,” Tobin’s eyes dart to Christen’s door once again.

“Someone’s gonna need to stay here with her, I don’t wanna leave her alone,” Servando says.

“Tobin can stay, she’s already seen Jack,” Ryan offers, a smile playing on her lips. Servando looks at Christen warily but then gives a slight nod.

“Fine, let’s go. I’ll go and say bye to her,” Servando says, standing up and walking over to Christen’s room.

“How long have we got?” Dom asks the room.

“Two weeks,” Tobin replies. Dom nods and stands up, heading out the front door.

“Two weeks, huh,” Ryan says.

“Yeah, I don’t know how Jack is gonna keep Christen away from this shit,” Tobin says, looking down at her feet.

“We’ll make it work,” Ryan says, forever the optimist.

“We’re gonna have to.”

***

  


Christen walks out of her room after unpacking everything in her suitcase. She freezes when she sees Tobin sitting on the couch, slowly sipping on a beer.

“Why are you here?” Christen asks bluntly, walking to the fridge to get a bottle of water.

“Servando wanted someone to stay and keep you company,” the girl replies, eyes still on the TV.

“So he chose you?” Christen scoffs.

“You got a problem with that?” Tobin grates out, sounding irritated.

“No, ma’am,” Christen says sarcastically, closing the fridge with a push of her hip. Tobin instantly turns her head, staring at her blatantly.

“What?” Christen asks, walking over to the couch and taking a seat opposite her. Tobin rubs her temple, like Christen’s giving her a migraine, and doesn’t answer. Christen’s gaze roams lower, down to Tobin’s muscular arms. She looks so strong. Her smooth skin glows and Christen almost sighs in appreciation. _How is she that tan?_

“Yes, we all know I have a fucked up face, you don’t need to stare,” Tobin snaps, averting her eyes to the TV. A muscle ticks in her jaw, her posture stiff.

“Actually, I was thinking how sexy you are,” Christen says honestly, giving Tobin another once over. Tobin turns to look at her, surprise evident on her face. Her eyes widen, and then narrow, as if she finally gets what Christen said.

“But even your sexiness doesn’t cover for your personality, or lack thereof,” Christen says in a saccharine sweet tone.

Tobin studies her for a second. “You’re gonna be trouble, I can tell,” she mutters under her breath.

“Me? I keep to myself, how can I be trouble?” Christen asks, scowling.

Tobin’s lips quirk into a crooked smile. “We’ll see.”

“Cryptic much?” Christen says, narrowing her eyes a little.

Tobin changes the subject. “Your brother and father love you, a lot. Don’t hurt them, Christen.”

Christen gapes. “You’re kidding me, right?”

Tobin gives her a look that says she’s anything but kidding. “If you leave all of a sudden, they’re gonna be heartbroken. They’ve been talking about you ever since I’ve known them.”

“Right, so they are the victims in all of this.” Christen’s voice sounds bitter even to her own ears.

Tobin’s eyes soften. “No one’s gotta be a victim. I’m just saying, they are good men, and you are their weakness.”

“I highly doubt that,” Christen says. “I’ve wanted to meet Servando my whole life. He’s the reason I’m here.”

“And Jack?” Tobin asks, studying her.

“You’re nosy, you know that?”

Tobin shrugs and tilts her head to the side. “I protect those I care about.”

“No one needs protection from me,” Christen says defensively.

“Maybe so,” Tobin says, turning her head. “They seem to think you’re the sweetest thing, but I know there’s some fire in you.”

“You’re making assumptions based on what, the whole thirty seconds you’ve known me?”

Tobin’s expression doesn’t change, but she stands up. “Do you want anything to drink?”

Christen blinks once. “Umm, sure.” She watches as Tobin goes into the kitchen, and opens the fridge.

“What would you like?”

“Apple juice, please.” Tobin pours some juice and brings it over to Christen, handing her the glass. Their fingers touch as Christen takes it and Christen's body instantly reacts, her fingers tingling. As soon as Christen grasps the glass Tobin pulls her hand away, frowning slightly.

“Thanks,” Christen says, sipping the drink.

Tobin looks at her once more, her brown eyes not missing a thing. Christen sucks in a breath, feeling those eyes penetrate her defenses. Tobin opens her mouth to say something but stops herself. Instead, she gives Christen a half shrug and returns her gaze to the TV. When she doesn’t attempt any more conversation, Christen mumbles a goodnight and heads to her room.


	2. "good ideas are overrated"

Christen wakes up the next morning and stares at the ceiling. She spent the night tossing and turning, unable to rest. She picks up her phone from the side table and sends a quick text to her best friend back home, Julie. Christen hears someone moving around in the kitchen, so she drags herself out of bed, desperate for some caffeine.

"Morning," Christen mumbles to Servando, who is standing shirtless, drinking some orange juice straight out of the carton.

"Morning, sis. Coffee?" he asks, offering Christen a grin.

Christen nods eagerly. "Yes, please."

Christen watches as Servando makes her a coffee, asking how she likes it. "Black, please," she tells him.

"Same as me," he says, smiling. He slides it towards her.

"Thanks." Christen grabs the cup and holds it between her hands. "You workout a lot?" She asks him, as she blows on the coffee.

Servando flexes his biceps, and Christen laughs. He's pretty ripped.

"Yeah we have a small gym set up that we all use." Servando puts the carton back into the fridge.

Christen wrinkles her nose at him. "Where do you work?" Christen asks, realizing she really doesn't know much about him.

Servando suddenly looks uncomfortable. "Jack has a business or two, I work for him."

"I see." But she really doesn't. What sort of businesses would her father own?

"What do you wanna do today?" Servando asks, his eyes sliding to hers.

"I need to find a job."

"You don't need to find work right away, Chris, I can take care of you," he says in a gentle tone. 

"I'm pretty sure that's meant to be my line," Christen says, her lips twitching.

"Why, because you're older?" he says, amusement lacing his tone.

"Yes."

"You're my sister, I'll take care of you," he tells her earnestly, his eyes now serious.

"I need to find a job, Servando, what else am I gonna do around here all day?"

"You could study something, find something you like," he offers.

"I do wanna study something, but I'm gonna work, too," she tells him, taking a seat on the barstool.

"You're stubborn," he says with a sigh. "Another thing we have in common."

"Really? And here I was thinking the only thing we had in common was our extremely good looks," Christen wiggles her eyebrows at him.

He tilts his head back, laughing. "That too, Chris, that too."

"What's so funny?" Tobin asks as she walks into the house. Christen instantly stiffens, aware that she's wearing only short shorts and a tank top.

Great, just great.

"Does no one knock when they come to this house?" Christen asks. No one answers.

"Go get dressed, Chris," Servando says quietly, his tone demanding. Christen rolls her eyes, but walks into her room, grabbing clothes to change into. She heads for the bathroom, taking a quick shower and brushing her teeth.

She dresses in a figure-hugging pair of jeans and a ripped up, old tee, leaving her hair natural.

When she walks out, conversation ceases. Christen sees Dom is now here as well, leaning against the wall, knee up. 

"Where's Ryan?" Christen asks, since she seems to be the only one missing. Christen sees Tobin scowl, her eyes flashing. 

"Don't worry your little head, she'll be here," Tobin snaps, her expression shuttered.

"Charming," Christen mutters to herself as she walks towards Servando. 

"Morning, Christen," Dom says, his eyes roaming all over Christen's face and body.

"Hey, Dom." She offers him a small smile.

"I'm gonna do some grocery shopping," Christen tells them, searching through her purse for her car keys. The pantries are practically bare and the fridge only has leftover pizza, beer, and some limes.

Which she assumes are for tequila shots.

"Wait, I'll come with you," Servando says. 

"I think I can handle going to the store without a babysitter," she tells him, giving him her best 'I dare you to say otherwise' look. 

"Yeah, but do you know where it is?" Servando smirks, leaning back against the fridge.

"Surely it can't be that hard to find," she says, rolling her eyes. She finally finds her keys and pulls them out.

"I can take you," Dom offers. Christen's eyes find Tobin, who looks way too good this early in the morning. Christen swallows hard. Tobin's body is just _wow..._something else. When Christen glances up into amused brown eyes, she cringes. 

_The last thing I want is for her to think I'm interested in any way._

Christen clears her throat and tears her gaze away from Tobin. "I'll be fine, but thanks, Dom," she says, waving to them before walking out of the house. 

Christen glances around the neighborhood quickly, before getting into her car. Pulling out her phone, she looks for the nearest grocery store, which turns out to be only five minutes away. She frowns when she sees a neighbor peeping over the fence, blatantly staring. He quickly ducks when he sees her looking. Christen shakes her head and drives off, deciding to detour and get familiar with the area. 

***

"You sure it's safe for her to go out alone?" Tobin asks Servando, not so sure about it herself. 

"She'll be fine, it's just down the road and no one knows who she is."

"Yet," Tobin says, knowing it's what everyone else in the room is thinking.

"No one will mess with her," Dom says confidently. Too confidently, and that's his weakness. Tobin tries to keep one step ahead, while Dom relies on his reputation way too much. It's true, Tobin's probably being paranoid. But they do have enemies, and it's always better to be safe than sorry. 

"That a gamble you willing to take?" Tobin asks the room. Servando curses and instantly goes into his room, coming out minutes later fully dressed. 

"I can go keep an eye," Tobin offers. The minute the words leave her mouth she regrets them. It's not her job to babysit Christen. Nor should she want to. Fuck.

"I got it, she's my sis, my responsibility," Servando says, but he's wrong. She's all of theirs because Jack made her be. Servando leaves in a hurry, now worried about Christen. Tobin's sure she's fine, there are just a few things Christen doesn't know about this town. 

About her father. 

About them.

Tobin thinks someone needs to update her, and quick. But fuck, what does she know? This is their decision to keep her in the dark, and it's not really Tobin's business. 

Then why does she feel slightly guilty?

"Where's Ry?" Dom asks, looking up from his phone, pulling Tobin from her thoughts. 

"At the gym, I'm heading there now before work." Ryan and Tobin own their own bar. It's just a small pub, but it's theirs and they do okay for themselves. Tobin likes to think their mother would be proud of them if she was around. 

"Alright. I'm gonna stick around and wait for Christen." Dom's trying to appear casual, but Tobin sees the way his eyes flicker to her before he looks back down at his phone.

"You know she's off-limits, right?" Tobin can't stop herself from asking. 

"Do you?" he replies. 

"Not my type," Tobin answers without hesitation. Dom mulls her comment over, before nodding in agreement. 

"You're right about that. Christen's a good girl," he says, a wistful smile on his face. It pisses Tobin off. _Fuck! She's only been here one night and she's fucking with my head already, _Tobin thinks to herself.

So what if she's hot? Tobin's had a lot of hot. Sweet, not so much, but only because she generally goes for women who know what they're getting into with her. They have no misconceptions of love, romance or forever. They use her, and she uses them. They both have a good time, no harm, no foul.

Christen seems like the romance kind. The kind of woman who would try to change someone like Tobin. 

Tobin's not changing for a pretty face. 

No matter how stunningly beautiful that face is. 

Christen Press isn't for her. 

***

"What's up with your neighbor?" Christen asks curiously, as they carry the last set of bags from the car. She might have gone a little overboard with the groceries, but she figures she'll end up cooking for everyone anyway. They seem to be a permanent fixture in the house. 

"What do you mean?" Servando asks. Christen found him in the parking lot of the grocery store she was at, and he said he wanted to make sure she found it okay. 

"I dunno. Nothing," she tells him, looking over the fence. Servando shrugs. The only person still in the house is Dom, who is texting on his phone, a movie running in the background. 

"I'm gonna head to the gym. You gonna see Jack today?" Servando asks, his tone nonchalant, but his eyes plead with hers.

"What's the big deal?" Christen asks, wondering why everyone's being so pushy. 

"Come on, he hasn't seen you in two years. He wants to see you, Christen."

"And a few more days won't kill him," Christen says, before leaving the living area. 

Her father is a tough subject for her to discuss. She doesn't know him at all. Sure she'd seen him over the years, once a year to be accurate. Her mother let him visit every year on her birthday and then she wouldn't see him again until the next. Even when he did visit, the look on her mother's face made Christen wish he'd just leave. She'd get angry and moody, but mainly bitter. Her mother hated her father, but she loved him, too. Christen knows that because so much hate had to stem from somewhere. When he cheated on her, he turned her love to hate. 

Her adoration to scorn. 

Christen's mother loved her, but she also loved to remind her daily what a piece of shit her father was for what he did to her, and what a menace Servando was. Christen doesn't know where her mother got her information from, but she always had news for Christen about her brother and all the trouble he was getting into. It used to hurt, a lot. She doesn't think her mother knew how it affected her, because she was so consumed by her own bitterness. But it hurt Christen everyday to have her say cruel things about her own flesh and blood, about the brother she hadn't even met but already loved. Her mother let her bitterness take over and control her, and then she passed away without loving anyone else.

Jack Carrasco was it for her. 

Apparently he was _it _for a lot of other women, too. Christen sighs heavily and lies down on her bed on her stomach. She needs to find a job and stat. She has a bit of money saved away, plus what's left of her mother's insurance money, but she can't rely on that for long. She was saving it for a rainy day. Her father had also opened a bank account for her, with all the child support he paid over the years, but she hadn't touched that. Not one cent. 

To be honest she doesn't really know how to feel about it. Her mother came from a wealthy family and money was never an issue growing up. She used to tell Christen that the best thing a man can do for his children is to love their mother, and he didn't do that for her. He didn't love her, at least not enough, and she paid the price. 

Christen grabs her book and continues to read where she last left off. A knock on the door pulls her out of her book. She puffs out a breath before calling out, "Yeah?"

The door opens and in walks the man of the hour. Jack Carrasco, her father. Christen sits up on the bed, surprised. 

"Hey, Christen," he says softly, his eyes bright. 

"Hey, dad." Christen stands up and walks over to give him an extremely awkward one-armed hug. 

"You are so beautiful, baby girl," he says, shaking his head in awe. 

"Thanks," she answers shyly. He looks the same. Tall, with dark brown hair and dark eyes, her father is one of those men who will always be handsome. He must be forty-five now, but apart from a few laugh lines, he looks younger than his age. 

"You didn't wanna see me?" he asks, looking worried. 

"Just wanted to settle in," Christen says, blushing. Trust her dad to get straight to the point. 

"I didn't see you last year for your birthday, Christen, it's been two years since I've seen my own daughter," he says, brows furrowing. 

Christen shrugs because she has no idea what he expects her to say to that. 

"How's Servando treating you?" he asks, thankfully changing the subject. 

"He's wonderful," she says, a smile forming on her lips. Her brother makes her feel welcome here, and she feels like she's known him her whole life. 

"He loves you." Christen nods, giving him a forced smile. He tells her Servando loves her, but not him. Again, she has no idea what to say. He exhales, a look of regret and sadness flashing in his eyes. 

"If you ever need _anything, _you come to me, okay?" he says, his dark brown eyes staring into hers. 

Christen nods and forces a smile. He scowls, and stares at her like he wants to say something else, but doesn't. He gives her a pained smile and then leaves. 

As soon as the door closes, Christen sags onto the bed, relieved. She didn't have a father her whole life, and she doesn't intend on having one now. Not that she doesn't love him, because she does. But it hurts, even after all these years. 

Truth be told, Christen's scared to let him in. He wasn't there for her, no matter how much she wished for it. She didn't want any money or gifts from him, she just wanted him. She wanted him to be there for her graduation, for her school dances and soccer games. She used to imagine him being there in the crowd one day, watching her, but it never happened. He let her down each time because he never came. That was the hardest, starting to believe what her mother told her, that it was true- maybe he didn't want her. 

After everything, it's just a little unnerving being in his presence. She still feels like that little girl who wants his attention. If Servando wasn't there, she wouldn't have come at all. 

She wouldn't have felt that she was welcome.

***

The next day, Christen opens the door, surprised to see Tobin standing there. And that the girl actually knocked for once. 

"You knocked," Christen says, stepping aside for Tobin to enter. 

"Yeah, well, it was locked for once." Tobin grins at her. _Oh, right._

Christen walks in front of Tobin to the kitchen. "Servando's not here."

"Where did he go?" Tobin asks, opening the fridge and helping herself to a bottle of water.

"Gym."

"Right, I'm heading there now so I'll catch up with him then," Tobin says, her eyebrows scrunching together. 

"Are you okay?" Christen asks. 

"Yeah. How are you settling in?" Tobin asks, looking like she genuinely wants to know. 

"Great, actually. Feels like I've known Servando my entire life." Christen smiles fondly, thinking about her brother. 

"Yeah, he can't stop talking about you," Tobin says, running her finger absently against her scarred jawline. "Do you maybe want to..." she trails off, staring at Christen. 

"What?" Christen asks warily when Tobin's gaze doesn't budge. 

Tobin clears her throat. "You look...beautiful today."

_Wait, did she just say that?_ "Umm. Thank you," Christen replies, looking down at her frayed denim shorts and white singlet top. She glances up to see Tobin's eyes on her thighs.

"Tobin," Christen says, smiling when Tobin trails her gaze from Christen's thighs to her face. "Not one for subtlety, are you?"

Tobin leans down onto the kitchen counter, her lips twitching. "I can't help it, it's been so long since I've seen something I wanted this bad."

Christen's eyes widen at Tobin's boldness. "Umm," Christen mumbles, the look on Tobin's face leaving her incoherent. Christen doesn't think anyone has ever looked at her like that. 

"You're not so bad yourself," she finally replies, leaning on the counter, so their elbows are almost touching. 

Tobin tilts her head, regarding Christen, "I told you... trouble."

Christen rolls her eyes. "How so?"

"I'm standing here right now, watching you. Pretended I came here to see Servando, when I knew he was already gone, just so I could get a few minutes alone with you. I can't seem to stop thinking about you. Trouble."

Christen's eyes widen in surprise. "You came here to see me?"

"I did, and now I can see it was a mistake. You're not for me, Christen, I shouldn't have come here," Tobin says, pulling back to stand straight. Tobin's eyes are now shuttered, her expression closed off. 

Having no idea what to say to that, Christen stays quiet. 

"I gotta head to the gym," Tobin says, turning her back on Christen and leaving. 

***

Christen's first week with Servando passes quickly. He goes to work or goes to the gym with everyone. Most days they come here to hang out, and Christen cooks them all dinner. 

Tobin doesn't come over as much as Dom and Ryan, and when she does, she's her usual charming self. They never mention her coming to see Christen. Sometimes Christen catches Tobin staring at her when she thinks Christen's not looking, but then her trademark scowl takes over, and then Christen thinks she imagined the moment when Tobin had come over altogether. 

Christen glances down and looks at her laptop once more, hoping she missed something. 

Giving up on the job ads, Christen decides to fill our her application for the course she wants to do. After changing her mind several times, she's settled on nursing. 

"What are you doing?" Servando asks as he walks in, shirtless and sweaty. He went for a run about an hour ago. That must have been one long-ass run. 

"I was looking for a job, but nothing. So now I'm filling out my forms for school," she tells him, looking back down at the application. 

"Why don't you ask Tobin or Ryan for a job?" he says, shrugging like it's no big deal. 

"Why would I ask them?"

"They own a bar. You could work there whenever you wanted, it'd be flexible for you with school, and there'd be people there to keep an eye on you," he says, lifting a brow. 

"I didn't know they owned a bar," Christen grumbles, not wanting to ask Tobin for anything. "And why do I need someone to keep an eye on me?"

Servando shrugs. "Dad has a motorcycle shop you could work in, too. I work there a few days a week. And because you're beautiful and new to town."

Christen's eyes widen. _That I did not know. Why did he seem so evasive about it before?_ "I'm sure I'll find something, and I don't need a babysitter." 

"Stubborn." Servando chuckles. "We're all stubborn."

"Apparently."

"Yep, it's a fact," he says, smiling. 

"I'm sure we're a lot of things," Christen says with a smirk. 

"Yeah, all good things, of course."

Christen rolls her eyes at him. 

A knock on the door disturbs their banter, and Servando goes to answer it. As soon as he says the words 'hey, mom' Christen freezes. _I don't want to meet his mother. _Christen quickly stands and heads towards her room. She's halfway there when Servando calls out her name. 

"Christen, come meet my mom," he says. 

Christen closes her eyes for a second, before turning around. Christen tries to smile but thinks it comes out more like a grimace. 

"Mom, this is Christen. Chris, this is my mom, Stephanie," Servando introduces. The woman is pretty, with dark hair like Servando's and the same brown eyes. 

"Nice to meet you," Christen says, hoping they'll start to talk so she can sneak away. All Christen can think is, this is the woman her dad cheated with when he was married to her mother. Christen doesn't know how to feel. Stephanie's eyes seem kind as they watch Christen before she finally speaks. 

"Nice to meet you too, Christen, I've heard so much about you over the years."

"Really?" Christen manages to say, feeling surprised. She wouldn't have thought they would have discussed her at all. Christen's eyes dart to Servando. He must see the look on her face because he frowns, and then starts to take Stephanie into the kitchen, offering her some coffee. 

He glances back at Christen, so she attempts another smile before walking back into her room and quietly closing the door. 

Servando walks into Christen's room an hour later without knocking. "What was that?" he asks, sounding confused, and a little angry. 

"What was what?" Christen asks, closing her laptop. 

"You looked at mom like she was the devil," he says dryly. 

"I don't know, I just don't know her," Christen lies. 

"Christen, she's a nice person. She'll take care of you if you let her," he says, his voice gentling. 

"I don't need a replacement mom," Christen snaps, losing her patience with the topic. 

"Fuck, I know. I didn't mean that. You just looked upset, and..." he trails off, a look of realization taking over his expression. "You're holding a grudge over something that happened what, twenty-two years ago?"

"If dad didn't cheat with her, maybe I would have actually had a father growing up," Christen tells him, deciding to be honest. She knows her feelings aren't fair. But that doesn't change the fact that she has them. 

"So, you'd rather I wasn't born at all," Servando snaps back at her, making Christen wince. She didn't even think of that. In fact, she was just thinking of herself, no one else. 

"Of course not, Servando," Christen says, rubbing her palm on her forehead. 

He doesn't say anything, so she tries again. 

"I'll try next time, okay? I can't help how I feel, Servando, but I'll try," Christen promises him. 

"Okay," he says, seemingly satisfied. They hear a knock on the door and Servando leaves to answer it. 

Christen props the pillows up and lays back on them so she's in a sitting position. Opening her laptop, she starts to check her emails when Tobin walks in. The door was left open, so she clearly didn't feel the need to knock. 

"Hey," Tobin says, a little warily. 

"Hey."

"You okay?" Tobin asks, looking concerned. 

"I'm fine, why?" Christen asks. "You can sit down," she offers, pointing to the end of her bed. Tobin hesitantly sits down, then looks back at Christen. 

"Servando said you were upset about something," Tobin says kindly. She sounds genuine, like she really cares about what Christen has to say. 

"I'll be okay, I'm just trying to be a better person and not let my mother control or define my actions anymore," Christen says honestly. As it leaves her mouth, she can't believe she told Tobin that. It's one of the most honest things she's ever said. 

Tobin nods, like she understands. "The fact that you're acknowledging it is a step in the right direction."

"I guess so. It's just messing with my mind right now," Christen admits. 

"Trust me, I know the feeling," Tobin says, scowling a little. 

"I just don't want to hurt Servando. It's hard, though, when you grow up being told one thing, and then you find out it's not the truth at all."

"You're a good person, Christen, forget about what you've been told. Start fresh and figure it out for yourself. Things aren't always what they seem," Tobin says, looking down at the floor. 

"You're being nice again, why?" Christen asks, closing her laptop. 

Tobin smirks. "Calling me out, are you?"

"Yeah, well, the hot and cold act is really getting old," Christen says, pursing her lips. 

Tobin nods twice. "Yeah, it would, wouldn't it? Look, I have a lot of shit going on in my life right now. I'm not in a good place. That doesn't mean I don't...care about you."

Then she stands up and walks away. 

***

"Get dressed, I'm taking you out," Servando says the next day when he walks into Christen's room. "Dress in workout clothes," he adds before he closes the door. 

'Out' ends up being Christen going with him to his gym. The gym is a warehouse, but it looks pretty decent. It has an octagon-shaped cage, a boxing ring, and then a section with weights, a treadmill, and other gym equipment. 

Christen blinks twice as she takes in Ryan and Tobin, boxing in the ring. They're both wearing nothing but basketball shorts and sports bras and boxing gloves. _Oh my. _Christen can't seem to tear her gaze from Tobin, her body slick with sweat, her muscles rippling with every movement. Christen doesn't even know how she can tell which one is Tobin from here, but she can. Tobin purposefully trips Ryan over, and Christen can hear them both laughing. They're obviously just messing around. 

"What's with the weirdly shaped boxing ring?" Christen asks, curious. 

Servando eyes her for a second before replying. "We like to fight."

"I can see that," Christen murmurs, her eyes still locked on Tobin. 

"Quit drooling, Chris," Servando chuckles. Christen doesn't even bother denying it. 

"Come on, this is like porn right here," Christen tells him, swallowing hard when Tobin throws off the gloves and runs a hand through her hair. Servando laughs. 

Tobin's impressive back is to Christen and she watches Tobin's muscles flex as she lifts her hands up behind her neck, talking with her sister. 

"Ryan isn't the settling down type," Servando smirks. Who said she was checking out Ryan?

"And Tobin?" Christen asks, trying to act casual. 

Servando laughs, and Christen winces knowing this isn't gonna be good. "Tobin screws around less than Ryan. A lot less. She has a couple of girls she sticks to, but they know the deal. No commitment, no emotional attachment. She's cold, sis. Please tell me you're just asking out of curiosity, not interest."

Christen looks at Servando and rolls her eyes. "Of course I'm just curious. A girl like that would eat me alive." 

_I hope. Oh, fuck._

"Good," Servando says, sounding relieved. "Come on, get on the treadmill."

"Are you hinting that you think I'm fat?" Christen gasps, just to annoy him.

Servando cringes, instantly backpedaling. "Of course not. You're perfect, but you still need to exercise. I thought we could teach you some self-defense, too."

"That actually sounds fun." 

The twins walk down towards them. Christen stares at Tobin. _God fucking damn._

"What's she doing here?" Tobin demands. Of course she has to open her mouth and ruin it. 

"_She _is right here and can talk for herself," Christen snaps. Tobin's eyes connect with hers, and Christen can sense her irritation and her...lust. 

Shit. 

"She's allowed to use the gym, Tobin. It does belong to her father," Servando says calmly, slapping Ryan on the back in greeting as he walks towards the equipment. 

"It does?" This is news to Christen. Tobin's gaze softens slightly, probably feeling sorry for Christen because she knows nothing about her own father. 

"Hey, Ryan," Christen greets, taking off her jacket, and putting it in the corner with her phone. 

"Hey, Christen," Ryan says, smiling. Christen walks in the direction Servando went, feeling two matching sets of eyes watching her as she walks away. Servando is on the phone, having a hushed conversation with someone, as Christen gets on the treadmill. 

"Chris, I gotta go," Servando says, looking distracted. 

"What? Why?"

"Jack called, he needs me for something. I'll tell the twins to keep an eye on you," he says, kissing Christen on the forehead before leaving. He says something to Tobin and Ryan, and to Christen's dismay, Ryan leaves with him. They leave in a rush. Christen hopes everything is alright. Tobin walks over, looking put out that she has to babysit Christen. 

The feeling is mutual. 

"They had to go, so I'll take you home when you're done," Tobin says, getting on the treadmill next to Christen. _Great, now I have to run right next to her. _They both exercise in silence for a few minutes, until Christen hears a soft groan escape Tobin's mouth. She turns to look at Tobin only to catch the girl's eyes on her boobs. 

"Enjoying yourself?" Christen asks sweetly, laughing when Tobin looks up sheepishly. 

"You have nice boobs," Tobin says, shrugging. 

"How romantic," Christen says dryly, crossing her arms over her chest. 

"What? You were blessed in that department."

"Thanks... I think," Christen says, a flush working up her neck. 

After twenty minutes Christen's had enough, and Tobin sighs. 

"Twenty minutes? That's how much stamina you have?"

"Depends on what I'm doing," Christen says with a grin. 

Tobin shakes her head, like she doesn't know what to do with Christen. 

"Come on, I'll teach you some moves." Tobin gestures to the ring. Christen's shocked when Tobin places a hand on her back, helping her up. Just a simple touch makes Christen shiver. Christen looks down, not wanting Tobin to see how she affects her. _If she can make me feel like that with just one touch...fuck. _

Tobin shows her a few different self-defense moves, and how to throw a punch. Christen's heart races, and not just from the physical exertion. 

"With all of us around you're gonna be safe, but I guess it's good to know, right?" Tobin says after she takes a sip from her water bottle. Christen stupidly didn't think to bring one, so Tobin offers Christen hers. 

"Thanks." Christen takes the bottle from Tobin, their hands touching briefly in the exchange. Christen lifts the bottle to her lips and drinks, her and Tobin's eyes still connected. She hands Tobin back the bottle and sits down on the mat. 

"How old are you?" Christen asks her. 

"Twenty-five."

Christen nods. "Who's older?"

"I am," Tobin says, then drinks more water. Christen thought Tobin would be older, even if it's just by minutes. Something about the way Tobin can be so serious, whereas Ryan is carefree and easy-going. 

"Thanks for staying with me, and not being an asshole," Christen says honestly, her eyes riveted on the smile that curves Tobin's lips. 

"I have my moments."

Christen can't help smirking. "I'm glad."

"You liking it here?" Tobin asks. 

"I am."

"Anyone asked you out yet?"

"Nope."

"Probably don't know what to do with such beauty," Tobin says softly. 

Christen opens her mouth, and then snaps it shut. "What?" she whispers. 

Tobin shakes her head, as if clearing it. "You have to know how stunning you are."

Christen knows she's not completely unfortunate looking. She's been called pretty before. But no one has ever complimented her with such passion and intensity. 

"You confuse me," Christen replies, averting her gaze. 

Tobin laughs humorlessly, sitting down next to her. "I can't even explain it. There's just something about you."

They watch each other in silence for a few moments. 

Tobin clears her throat. "I should get you home."

"Okay," Christen says. But they don't move. 

"Christen..." Tobin trails off, staring at Christen's lips. Christen moves a little closer, and Tobin moves the rest of the way so there is no space between left between them. 

"Are you going to kiss me?" Christen whispers, arrested in Tobin's big, brown eyes. 

"I don't think that's a good idea," Tobin whispers back, her eyes dropping to Christen's mouth. 

"Good ideas are overrated," Christen says breathily. Christen licks her lips, and Tobin's breath hitches. 

Tobin emits a low curse before capturing Christen's lips with her own, her hands in Christen's hair. When Tobin starts to suck on her bottom lip, Christen shudders with pleasure. Tobin's hands move to her hips, but instead of pulling her closer, Tobin pushes her away. Tobin stands, turning her back to Christen and locking her fingers behind her neck. When she faces Christen again, her expression is once again shuttered. Christen puffs out a sigh, and stands up, getting off the mat and walking towards the exit, picking up her jacket and phone on the way. Christen knows exactly what Tobin is going to say and she doesn't want to hear it. 

Tobin catches up to her and touches her elbow, steering her in the right direction. They walk in silence to Tobin's jeep, and she opens the door for Christen to get in. Tobin turns the music on, but it doesn't dispel the tension surrounding them. Christen's phone chimes with a text, it's from her best friend back home, Julie. 

"Who's that?" Tobin asks, being nosy. 

"A friend," Christen replies.

"Who is she?" Tobin asks, her voice tight. 

"How's that any of your business? Just because you don't want me doesn't mean others don't," Christen snaps. 

Tobin curses, opening her mouth to say something, but then she closes it and stays quiet. 

When they pull up to the house, Christen's desperate to leave. 

Being rejected by Tobin hurts. 

"Do you have a key?" Tobin asks, her voice low and raspy. 

Christen nods. "Thanks for the ride," Christen says as she jumps out and walks swiftly into the house. 

She doesn't look back, no matter how much she wants to. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed!


	3. "i don't get you"

Christen hops off Servando’s motorcycle, adrenaline still pumping through her body. She’s never ridden on a bike before, but _wow _, she’s definitely going to want to do that again. She takes off her helmet and hands it over to Servando, along with his battered leather jacket and pulls down at the hem of her red top which has ridden up past her belly button. She decided on this top with her favorite pair of skinny jeans and her black knee-high boots.

“You sure you don’t wanna keep the jacket on?” Servando asks, not for the first time.

“You act like an old man, you know that?”

“I just got my sister, so I can’t help it if I wanna protect you.” He sticks his hands in his pockets.

“I get that, but I should be looking after you, baby bro,” Christen teases.

He looks her over from head to toe. “I don’t think anyone’s gonna believe you’re older than me, Chris,” he says, looking amused. 

Christen huffs.

Servando just laughs. “Besides, I don’t wanna get into a fight when some asshole hits on you.”

“Hey, I have needs, too,” Christen jokes, laughing when she sees the look on his face.

“I’m gonna pretend you never said that,” he says, rubbing his temple as if to erase the image.

“Well, if some girl comes to hit on you, maybe I’m gonna feel a little protective myself,” Christen tells him.

He groans. “You mean you’re gonna be a cock block.”

“Depends. Are you?” Christen asks, knowing she has him.

“We’ll see.” He shakes his head at her. He seems so much older than this age.

They walk into Tobin’s bar, and Christen takes a look around. It’s a smallish place, but it’s packed out. There’s a bar, tables, a few booth seats, and a small dance floor. She can see Tobin manning the bar, wearing a black shirt with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows. Christen quickly looks away, not wanting to think of Tobin right now. Dom calls her and Servando over when he sees them, sitting at a table with a cute looking brunette. He whispers something in her ear, and she frowns, but gets up and walks away.

“Hey, Dom,” Christen says, taking a seat next to him.

“Don’t you look gorgeous?” he says, his violet eyes gleaming in appreciation.

“Thank you,” Christen says, wiggling her eyes at Servando, who scowls.

“What?” Dom asks, laughing.

Christen grins and winks at him, but doesn’t reply. Servando gets a round of drinks for them.

“You want me to ask the twins if they can give you a job?” Servando asks.

“No, I can ask myself,” Christen says. She doesn't want her brother to have to talk for her. After not being able to find any jobs around, Christen decided she was going to have to suck up her pride and ask. She waits until the bar isn’t busy and stands up, hoping to find Ryan.

_There's no way in hell that I’m gonna ask Tobin._

**Tobin**

_Why the fuck is she here?_

Tobin’s eyes must be popping out of her head right now. Christen just walked in, wearing a pair of jeans that Tobin has to wonder how she managed to get on. They're like second skin, and riding so low on her hips, Tobin hopes she doesn’t need to bend over for anything. The thought of her bending over makes Tobin instantly sweat, and she cringes, taking a sip of water.

Tobin knows Servando brought Christen here because this is a safe place for her, she can’t get into any trouble with the number of people that would protect her in here, but still.

Tobin can’t get that kiss out of her mind. Christen tasted so good, smelt so good.

Tobin turns around to get something out of the fridge, and when she turns back, there _she _is, standing right in front of her. Christen’s lips are perfectly pink, and Tobin’s gaze can’t help but be drawn to them, remembering how soft they were.

“Is Ryan here?” Christen asks, twirling a ring on her index finger. _Of course she wants Ryan. She seems nervous, maybe she wants to ask her out after what happened between us _. The thought makes Tobin grip onto the side of the counter until her knuckles turn white. _Why does it bother me so much? I have no fucking idea._

“She’s back there,” Tobin tells her, gesturing to the office. “Go right in.”

_Fuck, I’m a dick._

**Christen**

“Oh my god,” Christen gasps in embarrassment, as she opens the door to their office. _Ryan is here alright _. She’s currently got a woman up against the wall. She's fully naked.

“Fuck,” Christen hears Ryan grunt as she sees her. She opens her mouth to say something, but Christen quickly turns around and leaves before she can hear what Ryan has to say. She doesn’t look in Tobin’s direction as she walks back to the table.

“Everything okay?” Servando asks her.

“Fine,” Christen huffs.

“Then why are you blushing?” he asks, lifting up his beer and taking a long sip.

“Don’t make me say it,” Christen groans. Servando and Dom both sit forward, obviously not going to let this go.

“I went into the office to talk to Ryan, and let’s just say, she’s… busy,” Christen says, rushing the words out. Her face feels like it's on fire.

“Rookie mistake, Chris, never go into that office,” Servando says, chuckling.

“I’ll definitely remember that.” Lesson learned. _Why did Tobin send me in there? She must have wanted to embarrass me, and she sure as hell succeeded._

“Don’t be embarrassed,” Dom drawls. Christen relaxes her shoulders and tries to forget what she just witnessed, which is hard to do when Ryan walks over about twenty minutes later and sits next to her.

“Like what you saw?” She asks, wiggling her eyebrows. She doesn't seem that embarrassed, which makes it just a little more bearable.

“I think your technique could improve,” Christen quips, smiling when everyone bursts into laughter.

“Is that right?” Ryan drawls, smiling. She doesn’t even get offended, which makes Christen like her even more.

“Definitely, maybe you should practice some more,” Christen says, pursing her lips together to try and keep a serious face.

“That’s a great idea. You wanna dance?” Ryan asks her. Christen shrugs, why not? When she stands Ryan chuckles, and Christen can tell she thought she would turn her down. Christen _did _just catch her screwing another woman, but she has no interest in Ryan other than friendship.

“Look after her,” Servando calls out, but Christen can see his attention is on a girl sitting in the corner.

Christen walks to the small, crowded dance floor, and Ryan pulls her closer, making a grinding motion with her hips. When she adds in a thrusting move, Christen bursts out laughing.

“See, I can practice right here on the dance floor,” Ryan says, leaning closer so Christen can hear her. She smells like perfume and sex, and Christen wrinkles her nose at her. Ryan smiles and puts her hands on Christen’s hips, as she swivels them seductively. Ryan doesn’t come too close or move her hands anywhere inappropriate. This is just them dancing as friends, and Christen finds herself having fun.

Ryan spins her around, and they’re both laughing by the end of the song. They're walking back to the table when Christen sees Tobin staring daggers at her. Then she turns, looking around the bar until her eyes come across a stunning blonde. She waits until the woman's eyes meet her own, then tilts her head slightly towards the office. The woman smiles seductively and walks towards the office, her hips shaking with each step. She opens the office door and walks in, Tobin following her, and closing the door behind her. Ryan heads to the bar, taking over.

Christen swallows and looks away, taking her seat at the table. She skulls the rest of her drink, not even wanting to contemplate why she’s reacting the way she is. Tobin and she are nothing, not even friends. She doesn’t know how much time passes, but she distracts herself by talking to Dom, Ryan, and Servando, and having a few more drinks. The bar empties, so Ryan sits with her at the table.

When someone stands at the table, Christen can tell it’s Tobin without even having to look up. It’s like she has some sort of pull over her, some sort of energy that attracts her.

Christen can feel her, without even touching her.

Ryan laughs at her sister. “'Bout time you got some action, dude.”

Christen swallows hard, still not looking up at Tobin, waiting for her to leave.

Needing her to leave.

But she still stands there. Christen looks at her brother instead, smiling shyly across the room at the mysterious girl.

“Christen.”

_Why can’t she just leave? Now she wants to talk?_

“Yeah?” Christen says, reluctantly looking up at Tobin. She looks angry, for some reason. Like it was _Christen _that just screwed some random person in the office like they didn’t share that kiss.

“Did you ask Ryan whatever you needed to?” Tobin asks.

Christen looks at Ryan. “Oh, right. I was wondering if you had any job openings?”

Tobin looks surprised for a moment, but Christen doesn’t have it in her to care why right now.

“Sure, you can work in the bar,” Ryan offers, giving Christen a smile. Ryan is so easy to be around, Christen will be glad to have her as a boss. Tobin, on the other hand…

Tobin watches her carefully as if looking for a reaction from her little office party. But she isn’t gonna get it. Christen’s body reacts to Tobin, that much is certain, but she’s not one to play these games. She may not have that much experience, but she knows she deserves better than this.

Christen ignores Tobin for the rest of the night, but she can feel her watching. Christen’s doing a shot with Ryan and Dom when Servando walks over, looking sheepish. He rubs his jaw, looking at her.

“What?” Christen asks him warily, rubbing the alcohol off her bottom lip.

“I’m not coming home tonight. Ryan or Tobin will take you home,” he announces. Christen looks behind him to see the girl he was watching earlier. She decides not to make this easy on him. _What are big sisters for, right?_

“So, where are you going then?”

“To her house,” he answers, his eyes narrowing.

“Do you even know her?”

“Christen…”

She cuts him off. “What if she takes advantage of you?” She says it louder than necessary. Ryan and Dom burst out in laughter, and Servando just shakes his head at her, amused.

“That’s the plan, sis,” he smirks.

“Hey!” Christen calls out to the girl. She looks a little frightened.

“No glove, no love,” Christen reminds her. Servando instantly grabs her hand and pulls her away, saving her.

“They grow up so fast,” Christen muses, earning more laughter from the peanut gallery. Tobin walks up to her, leaning on the bar facing Christen.

“We needa talk,” she says, crossing her arms over her chest.

“We don’t need to do anything,” Christen returns, looking at the dance floor which is suddenly very interesting.

“Christen, we can’t just…”

“Can you call me a cab?” Christen asks her, interrupting her speech.

“I’m taking you home,” Tobin says, sounding irritated.

“Where’s Ryan?” Christen asks, looking around. _I swear she was here a second ago. _When she sees her heading to the office with the same girl from earlier, Christen gapes. _Again? Really? _Tobin chuckles at the look on her face and Christen hates that the sound sends shivers up her spine. She wobbles a little, feeling tipsy.

“Give me thirty minutes and I’ll take you home,” Tobin says, her tone final.

“I hope someone disinfects the surfaces in that office,” Christen says, more to herself than Tobin.

“Well, when you start working maybe that can be your duty,” Tobin says dryly, a scowl etched on her face.

“If I’m cleaning it, I get to use it, too,” Christen says, looking up at her.

_She’s so beautiful it hurts._

“I’m sorry, what?” Tobin growls.

Christen shrugs as if she doesn’t care either way.

“You think you can take some guy, fuck him in there and then I’ll - I mean - Servando will let him live?” Tobin says with a humorless chuckle. _Wait a second, what was she about-_

“Girl or guy, I don’t think it’s any of your business,” Christen says.

Tobin smiles evilly. “Servando, Dom, Ryan, your father… Do I need to keep going? There's no way anyone you decide to get with will survive the night.”

“Why do you care so much?” Christen snaps at her.

“That’s the question of the hour, isn’t it?” Tobin says dryly.

“I don’t get you!” Christen says, frustrated. She heads for the dance floor and stays there for a few more songs. When she returns to the bar, she walks up to Tobin and says, “I need another drink."

Tobin is about to reply when she looks towards the entrance. Christen leans to the right to see what she’s looking at, gaping when she sees it’s her father. Christen flops down on the barstool. Her father is kissing a woman. Or maybe she should say a girl, because she looks no more than twenty-five. Christen grimaces, turning away from him, and asks Ryan for another shot.

Ryan grins and pours her two. _What a legend._ Christen downs one shot, frowning when Tobin takes the other away from her.

“I’m cutting her off, Ryan,” Tobin tells her sister. Ryan gives Christen a sympathetic glance, leaning over and patting her on the head.

“Ry, stay with her for a sec,” Tobin says, walking off towards Jack. She says something to him, and then Jack glances towards Christen, looking surprised to see her here. He says something to his girl and she nods slightly, sending a glare Christen’s way before walking to a table filled with girls. Christen looks away and concentrates on Ryan instead.

“How was your second go?” She blurts out.

Ryan chuckles. “Better than the first.”

“Really?” Christen asks, a vision of Ryan’s naked body coming to mind. _I wonder if Tobin looks the same. No, probably sexier._

Ryan bursts out laughing. “What were you just thinking about?”

“Nothing,” Christen says quickly. “When do I start work?”

“You can come in tomorrow, alright. We actually do need someone. As you can see it’s just Tobin and me here tonight. We have a chick who works here, but today’s her off day,” she explains.

“Interesting,” Christen muses. Ryan laughs, putting her arm around her and pulling her close.

“Jack’s coming over,” Ryan says. Christen notices a lock of her hair out of place, so she lifts her hand up and fixes it.

“Good for him,” Christen says dryly.

“Hey, don’t be judgemental,” Ryan says softly. _Is that what I was being?_

“Christen, I didn’t expect to see you here,” Jack says, coming and standing next to her

“Well, here I am,” Christen says in a fake cheerful tone.

“Nice to see you again, sweetheart.” He sounds like he really means it.

“Where did Tobin go?” Christen asks him, looking around.

“Why?” His eyes suddenly turn hard.

“Cuz she’s taking me home,” she says, tilting her head. _Why the questions?_

“I can take you home,” he offers.

“No, thanks,” Christen politely declines, looking around for Tobin, desperate to get away from the man in front of her. When she sees her in a heated argument with a cute girl with short blonde hair, she changes her mind. She waits until her dad is busy looking at the girl he came in with, then walks outside and calls a cab, which luckily arrives a few minutes later. She almost falls asleep on the drive home but manages to stay awake. She pays the cab driver, and hops out, walking quickly to her front door. She unlocks the door, which takes a few tries, and locks it behind her as soon as she enters. She undresses and walks to her room, not caring right now where her clothes land. Tying her hair out of her face, she gets up on her knees on her bed, and face plants into the mattress. Sighing in contentment, she finally lets herself fall asleep.


	4. "i don't belong to you"

Christen flops over onto her stomach and groans. She can hear someone banging on the door. _Why? Why me? _Her throat is parched and her eyes won’t open. She puts the pillow over her head to block out the banging, but it doesn’t stop. She wills herself out of bed, throwing on an oversized T-shirt, and tripping over her purse on the way to the front door. She looks through the peephole, only to see Tobin standing there. Unlocking the door, she pulls it open and comes face to face with an extremely pissed off Tobin Heath.

“What?” Christen asks grumpily, not waiting for Tobin’s answer as she turns to head back to bed._ Surely she has a key? She’s over here all the damn time._

“Where the fuck did you go last night?” Tobin booms. Christen winces as her head throbs.

“I caught a cab home,” she says, rubbing her eyes.

“You caught a…” Tobin trails off, laughing without humor. “Next time tell someone where you're fucking going so we don’t have to spend the night worried about you,” she growls, walking to the fridge and helping herself to some orange juice.

“Why didn’t you just come here to see if I was home?” Christen asks.

“Of course I fucking did that! No one answered the door and there were no lights on,” Tobin snaps, not bothering to keep her voice down. If looks could kill, Christen would surely be dead right now.

“Can you please yell at me later? I’m hungover and I have the worst headache,” Christen sulks. Tobin’s expression softens a little at what Christen assumes is her pathetic appearance.

“Go to bed,” Tobin says. Christen doesn’t need to be told twice. She’s warm under the covers when Tobin walks into the room holding a drink, and two pain killers.

“Thank you,” Christen tells her gratefully, swallowing the tablets with some water. She’s surprised at Tobin’s thoughtfulness.

Christen yawns and offers Tobin a smile. “Is Servando still out?”

“Yup,” Tobin says, popping the p.

Christen frowns. “I should call him.”

“You should let your brother be,” Tobin says flippantly, sitting down on the bed.

“Where’s the fun in that?” Christen says, her lips curving.

“I almost got into it with Jack last night.” Tobin’s staring at the stuffed unicorn on Christen’s shelf, not looking at her.

“What happened?” Christen asks, raising her head.

“Just an argument.”

“How do you know Jack?” Christen asks.

Tobin collapses on the bed next to her and stares at the ceiling. “He used to be friends with… my dad.”

“Where’s your dad now?” Christen asks her softly, hoping he hadn’t passed away.

“In jail,” Tobin huffs, and Christen can feel the anger lurking behind her words. She thinks Tobin expects her to pry, and ask why he’s in jail, so she doesn’t.

“Okay,” she whispers, leaving it at that.

“Why did you leave? I told you I was gonna take you home,” Tobin says, biting out each word.

“You were busy talking to some girl, and I just wanted to get away from my dad, so I left,” Christen admits. She didn’t want to bring up the girl because she didn’t want Tobin to think she was jealous. There's clearly nothing between them, especially after what she did last night. They’re just friends, and Christen supposes she could always use more of those. Truth be told, she likes being around Tobin. Sure, she may be surly and brooding sometimes - okay, most of the time - but she has this quality about her that Christen can’t help but be drawn to.

“About last night...” Tobin starts but doesn’t say anything else.

“You don’t need to explain anything, Tobin,” Christen says softly, her eyelids feeling heavy.

“Why haven’t you asked me about my scar?” Tobin asks, changing the subject.

Christen shrugs. “I don’t even notice it anymore,” she says, meaning every word.

It’s a part of Tobin, and it’s neither ugly nor beautiful, it’s just Tobin.

*****

Christen wakes up suddenly, sitting up in bed. She almost squeals when she sees a head poking out of her sheets.

Tobin is in her bed, fast asleep.

Her limbs are sprawled out all over the place and she’s taking up a good three-quarters of the space.

Christen leans over her, smiling to herself. She looks so peaceful and serene, Christen doesn’t want to wake her, so she quietly leaves the room, heading straight for the shower. She takes her time in there, dries herself and then stands naked in front of the mirror staring at her reflection. _I've definitely seen better days _. She grabs a makeup wipe to remove the black under her eyes from her mascara, and puts moisturizer on her face.

“Yep, this is as good as it’s gonna get today,” she mutters to herself, throwing on her pink fluffy robe. She opens the bathroom door and walks out, the steam escaping the room with her exit. She takes two steps down the hall before she face plants into a rock hard wall.

Tobin Heath, in just a sports bra and sweats.

Christen swoons.

Tobin’s arms instantly come around her to stop her from falling over, and Christen’s face rests against her chest, Tobin’s scent engulfing her.

“Morning,” Christen mumbles into her chest. Tobin’s body shakes with silent laughter.

“Morning,” she says, her voice raspy as she steps back so their bodies are no longer touching.

“You slept in my bed,” Christen points out.

“I did,” Tobin says, suddenly frowning.

“What is it?” Christen asks, curious at the flash of confusion she sees in her eyes.

Tobin clears her throat and shrugs her shoulders a little. “It’s nothing.”

“Yeah, I’m gonna need a little more than that.” Christen crosses her arms over her chest, staring her down.

Tobin scowls. “Can I go to the bathroom without being asked a million questions? Fuck.”

“Okaaaay, then,” Christen drawls, stepping around Tobin and storming into her room. She locks the door behind her, letting her robe fall to the floor. She puts on a pair of red panties and a matching bra, followed by some distressed light denim jeans and a white V neck top. Shoving her feet into fuzzy socks, she opens her door and walks into the kitchen. She’s in the middle of frying some eggs and bacon when Servando walks in, gracing her with a huge smile when he sees she’s making breakfast.

“What? Your girl doesn’t take care of you?” Christen asks, raising an eyebrow. Servando sits down at the breakfast bar and eyes the frying pan.

“Why would she have to? I knew I had my own little chef at home,” he teases, pulling off his shirt and throwing it on the counter.

“How was your night?” Christen asks, making a face when she realizes what she asked. Servando laughs, looking amused. Tobin walks out, freshly showered and wearing nothing but one of Christen’s sports bras and an old pair of soccer shorts from when Christen played a season in high school. Tobin didn't ask, but Christen doesn't mind. It actually makes her heart race momentarily at the sight.

“What are you doing here?” Servando asks, eyeing Tobin.

“Who do you think kept an eye on your sis when you bailed last night?” Tobin says, her narrowed eyes showing her unhappiness.

“Sit down, both of you,” Christen commands, serving three plates. She takes her own to the couch and turns on the TV. Moments later they both join her. They all eat in silence, and she watches as Tobin and Servando both polish their entire plates in minutes.

“There's more in the pan,” Christen tells them, laughing when they both instantly get up to load their plates with second servings. The tension now broken, they all chat as they watch TV.

“Ryan told me to come into work today, I think,” Christen tells Tobin. She was a little drunk, but she’s pretty sure Ryan told her to.

“I’ll take you in, I gotta drop by anyway,” Tobin offers, which Christen thinks is sweet.

“What the fuck is going on between you two?” Servando blurts out, looking curious rather than angry.

“Nothing,” Christen says incredulously, turning to look at Tobin, who remains quiet.

“What’s your issue, Servando?” Tobin asks him, the atmosphere thickening.

“Tobin, let’s go,” Christen says, grabbing her bag and heading towards the door. She walks out the front and leaves them to say whatever they need to. She feels like this whole thing has nothing to do with her. She leans against Tobin’s Jeep, waiting for her. She walks out about ten minutes later, and opens the door for Christen. She rounds the car and slides into the driver’s seat and slams the door shut. She doesn’t say anything for the entirety of the journey, but Christen can feel her mind at work as she mulls over her thoughts. Christen chooses to stay blissfully ignorant, looking out the window and pretending she can’t feel the tension in the car.

“Ry’s not here yet,” Tobin says as she pulls into the parking lot.

“Who’s here, then?” Christen asks, seeing that the bar is open.

“Ash.”

“Ash?” Christen repeats, her eyes widening when she sees a chick with tattoos and short hair walk out of the bar, lighting up a cigarette.

Tobin stares at her and scowls. “She has a different bitch every night, don’t even think about it.”

“That’s Ash?” Christen asks, wide-eyed. _And I’m working with her?_

Perhaps _she _should pay _them _.

Christen didn’t realize she had said this out loud until Tobin curses and gets out of the car, slamming the door shut. Christen gets out of her side and storms over to her.

“And don’t call me a bitch,” Christen snaps.

“When did I fucking call you a bitch?” Tobin asks, looking confounded.

“You called women bitches, and if you haven’t noticed, just like you, I’m a woman, and I don’t fucking appreciate being called a bitch!” Christen sneers at her.

“Oh, trust me, I know you’re all woman,” Tobin says in a smooth tone, staring at Christen’s breasts and then her hips.

“That was a seedy look,” Christen lies. Really, it was hot and smoldering. Tobin chuckles, like she knows what Christen’s thinking.

“The way your body reacts to me, babe, I’m pretty sure that’s not what you think. You’re gonna be so responsive, I can hardly wait for a taste,” Tobin says softly so only Christen can hear. She hates the way it sends shivers down her spine, but she hates Tobin's wink afterward even more.

Christen punches her in the arm and Tobin grabs her shoulder, pretending the hit knocked her off balance. Christen rolls her eyes, laughing.

“Yeah, trust me, that’s not gonna happen, especially after last night, _babe _,” she laughs, crossing the road without Tobin. Ash's brows furrow as she watches her.

“Hey, Ash,” Christen says, smiling widely at her.

“Ash, you don’t get to touch this one,” Tobin says from behind Christen, smirking.

Ash chuckles huskily, pulling out another cigarette from the packet. “There’s a first for everything, I guess.”

“You’re… hot,” Christen blurts out. Tobin shifts on her feet, taking Christen by the arm and pulling her inside. “You even look at her and I’ll fire her. She has a girl at home, you want that on your conscience?"

“You’re a fucking piece of work,” Christen tells her, looking around the bar.

“Christen, I didn’t fuck that girl last night, so retract your claws,” Tobin whispers into her ear. _She didn’t? This girl is so damn confusing. _Christen can’t help but feel relief, but when she looks at it, does it really change anything between them?

“So what did you do, then? Play Monopoly?” Christen says sarcastically. She purses her lips waiting for Tobin’s answer.

“She started to kiss me and I pushed her away. I couldn't go through with it, it wasn’t her I wanted.”

“So, kissing means nothing to you? Maybe I should go and kiss the next person that walks by and see how you like it?”

“If you want to see a fight, sure,” Tobin says, narrowing her eyes a little.

“Hypocrite,” Christen mutters, gritting her teeth. _Why do I like her again?_

“Look at me, hey,” Tobin says, holding Christen’s chin in her palm. “I shouldn’t want you. I’m not good enough for you. I know it and you know it. But that doesn’t stop me from wanting you. Just being near you…” she says in a soft unwavering tone, briefly resting her forehead against Christen’s.

Tobin heads behind the bar, leaving Christen standing there, gaping like a goldfish. Ryan walks into the bar, saving her.

“Hey, Chris, you remembered,” she says, tugging at a lock of her hair.

“Of course I did. What kind of employee would I be if I didn’t show up on my first day of work?” Christen asks in a saccharine sweet tone.

“Probably like the employees I’m used to,” Ryan says, chuckling. She bounces on her feet, full of energy.

“It’s just the three of you?” Christen asks, looking around. There are about five customers, three of them sitting alone and staring into their drinks. Must be drowning their sorrows, because it's only two pm.

“Yeah, we had another girl, but as of last month she quit,” Ryan says, her eyes darting towards Tobin. _Or was it Ash?_

“Which one of them chased her off?” Christen asks, dying to know.

“Work gossip another day.” Ryan chuckles. “Today, let me show you the ropes. You ever worked at a bar before?”

“Not exactly,” Christen admits, but how hard could it be?

*****

Four hours and two broken glasses later, Christen’s getting used to everything. There's a chart telling her exactly what to put in each drink, and Tobin showed her how to use the cash register. A customer told her she wasn’t very good at pouring beer, but apart from that, she thinks she’s doing pretty well. Ash went home, leaving her alone with the twins.

“Can I help you?” Christen asks the next customer, cringing when she sees it’s the woman her dad was with the prior night.

“Vodka orange,” she purrs, a smug smile on her face. _What the hell does she have to be smug about? So, you’re fucking my dad, congratu- fucking- lations._

“So, you’re Jack’s kid,” she says, handing Christen a fifty. _I wonder if this is Jack’s money she’s using. Probably._

Christen doesn’t answer her, because she has nothing to say.

“I didn’t even know he had a daughter until last night,” she says, searching Christen’s face for a reaction. Christen schools her expression, not wanting her to know that her comment stung, because it did.

“Are you gonna be my new mommy?” Christen asks sarcastically, handing her the change.

“You’re not gonna get in the way of Jack and me,” she sneers, her face turning red with the hatred in her expression. She storms off, back to her table where her friends are.

“You okay?” Tobin asks, coming up behind her.

“Why would she think I'd get in the way of her and dad? What the fuck?”

“She knows Jack loves you, it’s easy for anyone to see, Christen,” Tobin tells her, grabbing her hand and rubbing her knuckles with her thumb.

“Jack could care less about me,” Christen says, walking towards the end of the counter where a customer stands. Christen serves him his drink and then watches as another familiar face walks up to her. The blonde-haired girl Tobin was arguing with from last night. Apparently the same people come here every day. _Great, just great._

Christen’s about to ask what she can get for her when Tobin walks up to her. “I’ll serve her, Chris. You go ask Ry if she needs you to do anything,” Tobin says, waiting for Christen to leave before she says another word.

_What the hell?_

_Who is this woman?_

Christen finds Ryan in the office, actually doing work instead of her usual activities in there.

“Need me to do anything else, Ryan?” Christen asks her, walking in and plopping down on her desk.

“If you can write down your availability that would be great,” Ryan says, pressing buttons on her calculator.

“Does Tobin have a girlfriend?” Christen asks, not looking Ryan in the eye as she says it.

“Nope. Why? You interested in the position?” Ryan asks, chuckling like it’s hilarious. _And what if I was?_

At Christen’s silence, Ryan lifts her head to look at her, the smile falling off her face as she realizes why Christen’s asking.

Christen’s interested.

In fact, she’s already a little invested.

Ryan stares at her for a second. “Tobin is my sister and I love her. She’s a great person, but she’s also very complicated. I’m not sure if you should head down that road with her, Chris. Especially with your dad and Servando, and yeah, I don’t think it’s the best idea.”

“And if I decided not to heed your warning?” Christen asks her, tapping her foot on the floor.

“I support Tobin with anything she chooses to do, but I’m also most probably going to say I told you so in the end.” Ryan offers her a sad smile, and then looks back down at her work.

“Where’s your mom?” Christen asks her.

“Dead,” she answers, her expression darkening.

“I’m sorry,” Christen whispers. She’s always been awkward in these moments, having no idea what to say or to offer comfort. She shifts on the desk.

“It’s fine, Christen,” Ryan says, her lip twitching at her obvious discomfort. Christen picks up a piece of paper and pen and writes down the hours she can work, which happens to be 24/7 until two months’ time when her course starts.

“Here,” Christen tells her, handing her the piece of paper. Ryan quickly scans it and grins. “So we have you all day, every day, for two whole months, huh?”

“Yup.”

“Perfect, cuz this Thursday Tobin and I have somewhere we need to be, so you and Ash can man the bar.”

“Alright,” Christen says, dying to ask where they need to be but refraining.

“Where’s Tobin?” Ryan asks, handing Christen another paper.

“Serving customers at the bar,” Christen sulks.

Ryan chuckles. “Which one is it this time?”

Christen turns her head to glare at Ryan. “What the hell, Ryan?”

“What? You’re a nice girl and…”

“Ryan,” Tobin seethes, walking in and glaring at her sister. They have a silent conversation, until finally, Ryan sighs, obviously giving in.

“Christen, watch the bar for a sec,” Tobin says, dismissing her. Her eyes are still on Ryan. Christen jumps up off the table and walks out, making sure not to touch Tobin as she exits. She closes the door behind her and stands in front of the cash register. There are no customers waiting to be served, so she just wipes down the table, wondering what the hell those two could be talking about. A shiver runs down her spine alerting her that Tobin is behind her.

“You okay?” Tobin rumbles, her body close but not touching.

“Fine,” Christen huffs, looking around for something else to clean.

“Christen…”

“Who is that girl?” Christen asks, cutting her off. She sounds like a jealous girlfriend but seriously, she knows that everyone is keeping things from her. She just wants to know why or in this case who.

“Don’t worry about her, Christen,” Tobin says in a bored tone, and Christen can tell it annoys her that she’s questioning her, demanding answers. _Well, too freaking bad._

“What’s her name?” Christen asks, spinning to face her.

“I don’t belong to you, Christen,” Tobin says, putting Christen in her place.

Christen swallows hard, having a hard time maintaining eye contact with Tobin’s intense gaze. “You’re right.”

She steps away and around her, walking back into the office. “Hey Ryan, do you still need me?”

“No Chris, you can go. Ash will be back here in about twenty minutes anyway. I’m about to head out, too,” she says, stacking papers into a neat pile.

“Can you give me a lift home?” Christen asks, shifting on her feet. Ryan gives her a curious look before nodding.

“Of course I can. You know I can never turn down a pretty face.” Ryan smirks.

“Trust me, I know,” Christen mutters, earning her a chuckle.

“I’ll meet you at your car.” Christen walks out of the bar without glancing at Tobin, although she can feel her eyes on her. She stands in the parking lot, suddenly realizing she has no idea which car Ryan drives. She’s seen her driving Tobin's Jeep but obviously she didn’t come in that today because Tobin did.

When Ryan walks out, she’s holding keys, and Christen sees a truck flash and unlock from the corner of her eye.

“You guys both have such nice cars,” Christen comments as they walk over. Ryan opens the passenger door for her, grinning.

“Mine’s better. In you go.”

Christen just laughs, keeping her personal opinion to herself. As Ryan climbs into the driver’s side, Christen takes one last glance at the bar and even from there, she can see Tobin looking at her from behind the counter.


	5. "does this feel like i don't want you?"

Tobin is absent for the next few days, working different shifts than Christen. Every time their paths do manage to cross, Christen tries not to look at her, which is harder than she thought it would be.

Thursday rolls around, and she and Ash are alone in the bar from six pm until closing, which can be anywhere from midnight till three am, depending on how many customers they have. She’s making a cocktail when she sees Tobin walk in, looking agitated. Her eyes shift as she looks around the bar before she stares straight at Christen. She shakes her head slightly from side to side, as if to clear it, and then heads into the back. She comes out moments later with Ryan, who is also acting a little off. Ryan approaches Christen and offers her a smile that doesn’t reach her eyes.

“We’re off. If Ash wants to close early, that’s fine. Also don’t go anywhere alone, alright?” Ryan says, placing her hand on Christen's shoulder.

“Okay. Is everything alright?” Christen asks, worried. Something feels off.

“It’s fine, don’t worry. Ash is gonna keep an eye on you.” Ryan places a chaste kiss on her temple. Christen looks back at Tobin who is standing at the door watching them. She looks down when it looks like Tobin's just going to leave without saying a word.

It really hurts.

The night goes slow as ever, even working with Ash, which is usually always fun. A man walks up to the bar and waits for Christen to serve him.

“What can I get you?” Christen asks him.

“You can give me your name, for a start,” he says, leering at her. Working at a bar, being hit on is kind of expected. But Christen still doesn’t really like or welcome it. Some men can take for no for an answer, but others…

“What can I get you to drink?” Christen asks again, emphasizing the drink part. She’s most certainly not on the menu, and neither is her name or any other knowledge about her.

“I’m surprised you’re not there with them,” he sneers, his face scrunching.

“What?” Christen asks, completely confused.

“What, aren’t you one of Tobin’s girlfriend's? Or Ryan's? I know how they all like to hang around after and wait for them,” he says, staring at Christen accusingly. Ignoring the douche bag, she walks over to Ash and stands next to her.

“Problem?” Ash asks, instantly scanning the bar. When she sees the man that spoke to Christen, she walks over. Christen starts to serve another customer, waiting for Ash to come back so she can ask her what the hell is going on.

The man leaves and Ash returns, but she ignores Christen. When all the customers are gone, Christen corners her.

“Explain,” Christen demands, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Not my place,” Ash says.

Christen doesn’t say anything.

“You wanna head home early? I’m gonna close up now,” Ash says, avoiding looking at Christen in the eye.

Christen’s nails dig into her palms. She inhales and exhales, trying to calm herself down.

Everyone knows what’s going on except for her.

And these people are meant to be her friends and family.

“Yeah, I’ll go,” Christen says quietly, getting her bag.

“Straight home, Christen,” Ash says. “Wait, I’ll walk you out.”

Christen nods her head.

*****

Christen can hear banging on the front door, followed by the sound of loud voices.

“Don’t fucking start, Servando,” she hears Tobin snap. _Tobin? What's she doing here?_

Christen sits up in bed and watches as her bedroom door opens and Tobin walks in.

“What are you doing here?” Christen asks, her voice thick with sleep. Tobin remains silent, taking off her shoes and her T-shirt. When she lifts up the covers and slides into bed next to her, Christen’s mouth is hanging open so wide she’s sure Tobin would get ideas if she was able to see it.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Christen grates out, pissed at Tobin's audacity.

“I need you,” Tobin says quietly, her voice sounding hoarse. She pulls Christen closer to her, and cocoons her in her warmth. _Why was I angry at her again?_

“I don’t like you,” Christen mumbles, as she doses off back to sleep.

*****

Christen wakes up with a hand on her ass. She leans into Tobin’s touch, moaning when Tobin's hands move to cup both of her breasts. Tobin’s satisfied chuckle pulls Christen out of the moment, making her remember exactly what’s going on right now. She pulls away and sits up, gasping when she takes in Tobin’s face.

“What happened?” Christen asks taking in Tobin's cut lip, and bruised eye.

“Got into a fight,” she says, shrugging her shoulder. When she grimaces at the movement, Christen knows she's probably been hit in the ribs.

“With who?” Christen demands.

“Don’t worry about it, Christen,” Tobin says softly, taking her arm and trying to pull her closer.

“So what, you think you can ignore me for as long as you want, and then just come over and hop into my bed?” Christen snaps, getting out of the bed and looking around for some pants. She’s dressed in just an oversized top and underwear.

Not even sexy underwear at that.

“Baby.” Tobin sighs, running her hands through her messy hair. Christen sees her favorite pair of sweats thrown over her chest of drawers and grabs them, shoving them on angrily.

“I don’t get you, Tobin, either you want me or you don’t. And if you don’t, that’s fine. Just let me go so I can find someone who does!” Christen yells, her anger over the last few days erupting.

“Come here,” Tobin rasps, patting the bed.

Christen doesn’t move, just crosses her arms over her chest.

“Please?” Tobin asks, pouting. Christen sighs, frustrated, but moves to sit at the edge of the bed.

Tobin frowns. “Come _here _.”

Christen rolls her eyes, but slides towards Tobin, who is now propped up on her elbow. She takes Christen’s hand and guides it under the covers and inside her sweats, down to her- _oh my God. Holy fucking shit. Is she really- Oh, yep, she's doing it-it's warm- fuck, what is- shit, shit- She’s so fucking wet. What the fuck. She’s not even wearing underwear. What the fuck._

“Does this feel like I don’t want you?” Tobin says dryly.

Christen feels her face heat up. She doesn’t know why she’s not stopping this, doesn’t know why she can’t move her hand. She feels her nipples start to get hard.

She opens her mouth. And then closes it. And then opens it again.

After a long moment of just staring at Tobin, Christen closes her eyes hard and shakes her head, seemingly coming to her senses.

“Don’t try to distract me with that!” Christen blurts, extracting her hand and standing up quickly, pointing at Tobin accusingly, wiping her fingers on her sweatpants, visibly flustered.

“Christen, you don’t understand…”

“You’re right, I don’t. If you think your _wetness _is supposed to be a compliment, you’re mistaken,” Christen growls.

Tobin’s lips tighten, and for a moment Christen thinks she's trying hard not to laugh.

_I am so in over my head._

“Where were you last night?” Christen asks, enunciating each word. Tobin rubs her face, not even wincing when she touches her injuries.

When she doesn’t reply, Christen walks out of the room and heads for a shower. When she returns to the room thirty minutes later, Tobin isn’t there.


	6. "maybe she needs someone to fight for her"

“Dinner’s ready!” Christen calls out to the group, who are playing video games and drinking beer.

“Smells good, sis,” Servando says as he walks up, kissing her on the top of her head.

“Of course it does,” Christen brags, placing all the plates on the dining table. Dom and Ryan walk over, taking a seat, serving their plates and digging in. Christen looks at the spare seat that would be occupied by Tobin if she were there. It had been two days since Christen saw her last.

“Seriously, this is the best steak I've ever had,” Ryan says as she takes a huge bite. Christen takes a bite of mashed potatoes and wonders where the hell Tobin is.

“I’m moving in,” Dom says, his mouth full.

“Where's Tobin?” Christen blurts out, not being able to hold it in any longer.

The table goes silent.

Ryan keeps her gaze trained on her food when she says, “She’s at home.”

“Why didn’t she come over for dinner?” Christen asks, noticing Servando frowning from the corner of her eye.

“She has company,” Ryan says reluctantly, finally lifting her head to look at Christen.

“I see,” Christen mumbles, now looking down at her own plate. That’s Ryan’s nice way of saying Tobin is at home with some other girl.

_Fuck. This._

Servando gets up and heads into the kitchen, walking back and putting a drink on the table next to Christen’s plate.

“Thanks,” She tells him as she opens the cap and skulls it. It’s one of those girly vodka mixed drinks that Ryan bought for her since she knows she doesn’t care much for beer.

“Dad says he wants you to go over to his house tomorrow for dinner,” Servando announces to the table.

“Why didn’t he tell me himself?” Christen asks.

“He said you wouldn’t answer your phone,” he says, eyeing her knowingly.

_Oh yeah._

“I’m not sitting there with him and his little girlfriend,” Christen says bitterly, finishing her last bite.

“What?” Servando asks, sitting up straight in his chair.

“She came up to me and said some shit. I can’t stand her, and frankly I’m not too fond of Jack either,” Christen says, looking down.

“Christen…”

“Can we go out?” Christen asks, standing up and clearing hers and Ryan’s plates. She doesn’t wait for an answer because she’s going out with or without them. She walks into her room, closing the door behind her with a push of her foot. Knowing exactly what she’s going to wear, she strips off her top and unbuttons her jeans. She’s about to push the jeans off when Ryan walks in without knocking. Christen squeals a little, covering her bra clad breasts with her hands. Instead of being embarrassed, Ryan grins and closes the door behind her.

“You have a nice body, Christen,” she says, approval dripping from her tone.

“I’m glad you approve,” Christen says dryly, opening her closet door and pulling out her little black dress. 

“Are you alright?” Ryan asks, taking a seat on the bed.

“Are you just gonna sit there and watch me undress?” Christen asks as she lets her hands drop from her breasts so Ryan has a plain view of her bra.

“Hold on a sec,” Ryan says as she lifts her phone to her ear. “Hey, Tobs.”

Christen’s heart stops beating.

“Just wanted to see where you are tonight cuz I’m taking Chris out and I don’t want her to run into you,” Ryan says into the phone, smirking at whatever Tobin replies. Ryan stares up at Christen, a mischievous look taking over her face.

“You can take the bra off too, Christen, nothing I haven’t seen before, trust me,” she says, Christen’s sure so that Tobin can hear. Christen rolls her eyes at Ryan’s antics and takes her dress into the bathroom so she can undress in peace.

She exits the bathroom twenty minutes later, dolled up and ready to party. With her black dress, she’s wearing her strappy platform heels that make her legs look longer than they really are. Her dark hair is down and ironed dead straight, and her makeup consists of a light-brown smokey eye and a nude lip.

“Someone’s dressed to kill,” Ryan says as Christen walks back into her room, doing a little turn to show the back of her dress or lack thereof. Ryan stands up and walks over to her.

“You look beautiful. My sister’s a dumbass,” Ryan says, checking Christen out again.

“Thank you,” Christen tells her, meaning it. That was the perfect thing to say. She walks out, frowning when she sees Servando and Dom missing in action.

“They had to go somewhere, they'll meet us out. Come on,” Ryan says, heading to the front door. Christen locks up the house and slides into Ryan's car, wrinkling her nose.

“It smells like… sex,” Christen says, looking at Ryan’s profile. Ryan laughs but doesn’t explain. Christen doesn't press the matter, deciding she probably doesn't want to hear the details.

“How come I’ve never seen Dom hook up?” Christen asks, suddenly curious.

Ryan shrugs, keeping her eyes on the road. “That’s Dom’s story.”

Christen makes a growling sound in her throat and Ryan laughs. “So glad to amuse,” Christen deadpans. When they pull up into a parking lot of an apartment complex, her head snaps to Ryan.

“What the fuck…”

“I have to stop by and get dressed, I’m not going out like this,” Ryan says gesturing to her jeans and T-shirt. _She looks fine to me._

“Fine, I’ll wait here,” Christen says, pulling out her phone from her purse to keep her amused.

“I can’t just leave you here,” Ryan says.

“You can.”

“Tobin isn’t here. When I called her she was at the bar, so you don’t have to worry about seeing her,” Ryan says, getting out of the car and walking around to open Christen’s door for her.

“Promise?”

“I promise, Chris, come on.”

When they get to Ryan and Tobin's shared apartment, Ryan unlocks the door and gently pushes Christen to enter before her. She turns on the lights and Christen walks in, checking the place out. It’s spacious and beautifully decorated, sparsely but lovely just the same.

“This is my room,” Ryan says opening the door to a large room, with a huge bed and probably the largest TV Christen’s ever seen. Ryan turns the TV on and tells Christen to sit, leaving the room, and returning minutes later with a vodka orange for her.

“Thanks,” Christen says, taking a sip. She cringes when she realizes it’s mainly vodka. “If this is how you pour your drinks at the bar no wonder so many women want to go home with you,” Christen jokes. Ryan messes her hair up with her hand and then leaves to the bathroom. Christen finishes her drink slowly, smiling when she hears Ryan out in the kitchen. She stands up, and wobbles slightly, before walking out to the kitchen to ask for a refill.

“Ryan, I…” she trails off when she sees Tobin standing there. Christen wants to die. _What the hell is she doing here? Yes, I know this is her apartment, but come on._

“What are you doing here?” Tobin demands, eyeing Christen’s bare feet and her empty glass. She took her shoes off and left them in Ryan’s room. When Ryan walks out a few seconds later, with no shirt on, she’ll admit it doesn’t look good. But when a girl walks up and stands next to Tobin, Christen could care less how it looks.

Christen gives Ryan the dirtiest look she can muster, but Ryan just shrugs. “Dude, I thought you were at the bar.”

_Well, at least Ryan didn’t lie to me._

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know I was gonna be interrupting something,” Tobin says in a cold tone. She looks gorgeous as always, wearing ripped jeans and a black shirt. Her hair is disheveled, like someone was running their hands through it…

“Ryan, get dressed, and let’s get out of here,” Christen says, putting her hands on her back to push her towards her bedroom door. Christen grabs the bottle of vodka from the table, realizing there's no way she’s standing here with Tobin and her girl, so she follows Ryan into her room.

“You gonna watch?” Ryan teases, pulling a fresh shirt out of her closet and shoving it on.

“Turnabout is fair play,” Christen jokes, not wanting to think about Tobin.

_Tobin and another girl._

_How stupid am I?_

“Hey, you alright?” Ryan asks softly, doing up the buttons on her shirt.

Christen swallows hard before answering. “I’m fine.” She takes a sip of vodka straight from the bottle.

“Does this shirt look okay?” Ryan asks her. Christen can’t help it, she starts laughing.

The door suddenly bursts open, the sound making her jump.

“What are you doing here, Christen?” Tobin asks, her teeth clenching with the effort.

Christen looks at her but doesn’t reply, taking another swig of vodka instead.

Who knew she was so classy? Apparently Tobin brings out the best in her.

“I’m taking her out, Tobin, she deserves a night out,” Ryan says as she puts on her shoes.

Tobin paces up and down, looking agitated.

“Let it go, Tobin. You need to let it go,” Ryan says softly, a flash of sadness and regret crossing her expression.

“I can’t,” Tobin states flatly.

“Tobin?” Christen looks up at the door to see the same girl walk in. The blonde from the bar. Christen didn’t even glance her way when she saw her in the kitchen, so she didn’t recognize her, but it’s definitely her. Shortish blonde hair, big eyes, a lot of makeup.

“Ryan,” Christen says, her tone impatient.

“I’m done,” Ryan says, pushing her wallet into her jeans.

“I’m surprised you can even fit that in there,” Christen tells her, pursing her lips. She looks anywhere but at Tobin, because if she looks at her, she’s gonna lose it.

Ryan grins, turning around and doing a little ass shake. Christen forces a giggle and then head towards the door, sidestepping both Tobin and her mysterious blonde. When she walks past, Tobin gently takes hold of her arm. “Chris,” she says softly, her voice pleading.

_Pleading for what?_

“Let’s go, Ryan,” Christen says, walking to the front door, not looking behind her.

***

_Could today get any more awkward? _Christen’s sitting at her dad’s dinner table, eating with him and his girlfriend. She feels like she’s a kid again, pissed at not having his attention.

“How’s everything, Christen?” Jack asks, seemingly interested.

“Fine.” Christen takes a sip of her soda.

“Do you need any money?” He asks kindly.

“No, thank you.” Christen pulls out her phone and sees a text message from an unknown number.

“Okay, I know you’re stubborn, but you know anything I have is yours,” he says, his gaze never leaving Christen.

“Except your time, of course,” she says without thinking. Jack looks surprised, and it annoys Christen further.

“I didn’t think you wanted to spend any time with me. I had to pretty much beg you just to get you here for dinner,” he says, the sadness in his tone making Christen feel guilty. Her dad is pretty scary looking. Tall, built, bearded and tattooed. But he's a real softy, especially with her. He’s never yelled at her or anything like that, although from what she’s been told, it’s only her he treats like that. She thinks it’s from the guilt of never being there for her.

“Yeah, and when I do show up you don’t even want one on one time with me, instead you have your girl here who I don’t even like,” Christen says in all honesty. She emphasizes the 'girl' part. When her dad looks shocked, she sighs dramatically.

_How can he be so obtuse?_

“Tina, leave me alone with my daughter, please,” he says, his tone picking up strength when he addresses her.

“You can’t be serious,” she whines, glaring at Christen.

“Please,” he says calmly, and she stands up to leave, making a big show of it. When she finally goes into the bedroom, slamming the door behind her, he looks straight at Christen, his gaze softening.

Christen feels like he is looking right through her right now.

“I knew you weren’t fond of her, I thought it was just because of her age,” he says.

“She’s rude. She thinks I’m going to come between the two of you,” Christen tells him.

“She said that?” he growls, starting to look angry. Christen shrugs, not wanting to get into it.

“That’s because she knows nothing is more important to me than you and Servando. I know I haven’t always been there for you, but not because I didn’t want to be. Your mother told me I could only see you once a year, Christen. And I wasn’t exactly in the position to ask for full custody. I didn’t want to take you away from her anyway. I didn’t want to pull you from the life you knew. I wanted you with me, trust me, but I didn’t want to be selfish. After all was said and done, she was a good mother to you, so I took what I could. God, I used to wait until your birthday so I could see you. See how much you'd grown, how beautiful you were getting,” he says, his voice wistful.

“Really?” Christen whispers, her voice breaking.

“Of course, Christen, you were my little girl. You are my little girl. There's nothing I won’t do for you.”

“She said you didn’t care about me, you just left me to be with your new family,” Christen says softly, her voice wavering. He slams his fist down on the table, making her jump.

“She lied, Christen,” he growls, his face contorting in anger.

Christen exhales deeply, leaning her chin on her palm. “You cheated on her.”

Jack noticeably flinches. “I did. My relationship with her wasn’t working, but it had nothing to do with you. You were the only reason I stayed with her. You were my little princess, Christen, and she used you as a weapon against me.”

“She told me the best thing a father can do for his daughter was love her mother,” Christen says, her tone now emotionless. When she sees a tear roll down her father’s cheek, her own tears flow.

“I messed up, but I never stopped loving you, Christen.” Christen gets up from her chair and walks over to him, throwing her arms around him and burying her face in his neck. She cries as he keeps apologizing over and over again, making her cry further.

“I hate seeing you cry,” he says gruffly, wiping her tears with his thumb.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. I want you in my life, I want to show you how much I love you. You make an old man proud.”

“I want that, too,” Christen admits. “And you’re not that old.”

Jack kisses her on the cheek.

“I’ve missed out on so much. Your mother sent me pictures and kept me updated, but I missed out on being there for you. I regret that we can’t get that time back, but we have now. You’ve made me so happy by coming here, Christen.”

When the sobs subside, Jack and her talk, for what feels like the first time. They listen to each other, and they get to know each other.

And it’s perfect.

“Servando tells me you have eyes for Tobin.” He doesn't look too happy about it.

“I _had _eyes for Tobin.” Christen’s heart hurts at the mere mention of her.

“She’s a complicated kid, but a good one,” Jack says, watching Christen carefully.

“She doesn’t want me,” Christen says, feeling sorry for herself.

“You are the most beautiful girl in the world, of course she wants you,” he says, sounding defensive on her behalf.

“You have to think that, I’m your daughter,” Christen says, her lip twitching.

“Doesn’t mean it’s not the truth. I’ve known Tobin for years, you know that? I was friends with her parents, before...”

“Before her mother died?” Christen adds when he doesn’t continue.

“Right. She’s got a good heart, she loves her siblings more than anything,” he says.

“Siblings?”

“Yeah, she had a brother, too. Younger. Mikey. He passed away two years back,” he says sadly.

“What?” Christen whispers. Tobin lost her mother and her baby brother? And her dad’s in jail?

_Shit. That’s a lot of heartbreak right there._

Christen scrubs her face with her hand.

“You care about her a lot, don’t you?” Jack asks.

“It doesn’t matter.”

“It does,” he huffs.

“She needs to be willing to fight for me, dad, but she doesn’t want to,” Christen says, shrugging.

“I think she’s doing enough fighting for other people, Chris, maybe she needs someone to fight for her,” he says, a knowing look entering his eyes.

“You’re supposed to be on my side,” Christen complains, rolling her eyes.

“I’m always on your side, but if you had to pick someone, you could do a lot worse than Tobin.”

“Is that so?” Christen mutters.

“Don’t get me wrong, she hurts you, and she’s dead,” he says, an evil glint entering his eyes.

Christen sighs. “I don’t know what’s gonna happen with us, to be honest.”

“So, you don’t like Tina, huh?” he asks, changing the subject.

Christen shakes her head.

She never sees Tina again.


	7. "where the fuck is she?"

Christen tries to school her features, contain her surprise when she sees Tobin at the bar when she walks in. _Guess she couldn’t avoid me anymore. _Christen nods her head at her in welcome and puts her bag in the office. When she doesn’t see Ryan or Ash, she groans out loud. Looks like it’s just Tobin and her tonight. _Well, fuck. _It’s been a week since she saw Tobin at her apartment, but she hasn’t been far from Christen’s mind. When she got asked out on a date last night at work, she actually said yes. She needs to move on, and she misses having Tobin around.

“How have you been?” Christen asks Tobin, noticing the dark circles under her eyes. _She looks tired._

“Okay, you?” Tobin asks, throwing down the tea towel she was wiping the glasses with.

“I’m okay, I miss you, though,” Christen blurts out, needing to be honest.

Tobin’s face softens. “God, I miss you, too,” she says quietly. So quietly Christen almost didn’t hear it.

“Can we just be friends? Stop avoiding each other?” Christen asks, putting herself out on a limb.

“Friends?” Tobin repeats, a strange look flashing in her eyes.

“Sure, I mean. It has to be better than this, right?” Christen gestures with her hand between them. She hates the constant avoiding of each other and the awkwardness and Tobin feeling so distant.

Tobin nods once but doesn’t look too happy about it. “Where's Ryan?” Christen asks. Ryan has become one of her best friends. She looks out for her, and they always have fun together.

“She’s out with her new girl of the week,” Tobin answers, watching Christen’s face carefully. Christen knows what she’s looking for, any signs of jealousy. She isn’t going to find any though because Ryan and she are friends and nothing more.

“She was cute,” Christen says with a smirk, thinking back on last night when she met Ryan's date at the bar.

“Are we okay?” Tobin asks suddenly, her mood shifting.

“Sure,” Christen says, the side of her lip quirking. _What else can I say?_

“I haven’t seen you at the gym,” Tobin says. _God, her eyes are so beautiful. Are they lighter than Ryan’s? They seem so._

“I went once more with Servando but that’s about it. I think I’m gonna stick to doing yoga.” Christen starts stacking glasses.

Tobin's eyebrows rise. “Sounds hot.”

Christen smiles, her eyes scanning the empty bar. “Never seen the place so dead.”

“It gets like this now and again.” Tobin lifts her shoulder in a shrug.

“What do you want me to do?” Christen asks. The place looks clean enough to her.

“You can wipe down a few of the tables,” Tobin says. Christen nods, getting out the spray and towels and wiping down all the tables thoroughly. She pulls out the vacuum and gets to work, making sure the floor is spotless, too. When she can’t find anything else to do, she goes and stands next to Tobin, who is going through receipts at the cash register. She looks up at her, her expression unguarded.

“I know I’m horrible, Chris. God, you are so beautiful. I just, I need some time. Can you give me that?” Tobin asks, her eyes so intense.

“I don’t get what you want from me, Tobin,” Christen replies, not looking away.

“I want you, but I can’t have you,” Tobin says, her expression now veiled.

“You can have me, I’m right here! You’re the one pulling away, playing hot and cold with me.” Christen really wants to understand, but Tobin's not giving her much.

“It’s not the right time, I can’t get involved with anyone right now.” Tobin slams the cash register shut.

“Exactly, so we can be friends. You can fuck whoever you want, and I can do the same,” Christen says, gauging Tobin’s reaction.

She doesn’t look pleased. “Are you trying to tell me you’re fucking someone?” Tobin growls, and Christen sees a flash of pain and regret before she masks her expression.

“What I’m saying is that it isn’t any of your business,” Christen says, her gentle tone softening the blow of her harsh words.

“Who?” Tobin grates out, her jaw clenched.

“No one!” Christen huffs, sighing in relief when a customer walks in. However, when she sees it’s Tobin’s blonde her temper gets the best of her.

“Who is this bitch?” Christen asks Tobin, saying it loud enough for her to hear.

“Don’t talk about her like that, Christen,” Tobin snaps, walking over to the girl and talking to her in hushed tones.

_What the hell?_

Christen walks into the office and starts sorting through papers, not wanting to see Tobin act tender towards another girl. _Why is she always around?_

It takes about half an hour until Tobin approaches her. “Christen, we’ve got customers.”

Without saying a word, Christen puts the papers down and heads out the front, serving a couple of girls who had just turned legal.

“What can I get you?” Christen asks a cute dark haired guy. He looks to be about her age, with a lanky frame and bright blue eyes.

“I'll have a beer,” he says, grinning.

“What kind?”

“How about you pick one for me,” he says, leaning against the bar. She picks out the girliest beer she can find and hands it to him. He chuckles, shaking his head at her, handing over the money.

“What’s your name?” he asks.

“Christen, you?”

“Liam, nice to meet you.” He eyes her, taking a small sip of beer.

“You, too.”

“I haven’t seen you here before,” he says.

“I’m kind of a new recruit,” Christen tells him, pushing her hair behind her ear.

“Can I take you out?” he blurts out, flushing. Christen finds herself leaning forward a little, endeared by his shy expression.

“No chance in hell, Liam,” comes a growl from behind her. Christen exhales deeply, causing her hair to blow in the air.

Liam looks surprised. “She yours?”

“Doesn't matter. Leave,” Tobin says, steel in her tone.

Liam shakes his head. “See you on Thursday, Tobin,” he says, throwing a longing glance Christen’s way before walking to a table with a few other guys.

Christen sighs. “That was really rude.”

“You want him?” Tobin asks, her lips pursing. “He’s a kid.”

“I just want you, Tobin, but I don’t always get what I want, do I? I learned that at a young age. You need to stop with the whole ‘if you can’t have me, neither can anyone else’ thing because it’s selfish and I’m getting sick of it.”

Tobin scrubs her hand down her face, staying silent for a second before she replies. “You want me to say it's okay for you to be with someone else? Because that’s never gonna happen. Ever.”

Christen stomps her foot in frustration. “Where did your girlfriend go?” she sneers.

“She’s not my girlfriend, Christen,” Tobin says patiently. “And what’s with the foot-stomping? I thought that was only something girls did in movies.”

“Then who is she?” Christen demands, ignoring Tobin’s attempt to lighten the mood.

“Why, you jealous?” Tobin says, crossing her arms over her chest.

“What do you think?” Christen snaps, copying her stance.

“She’s not my girlfriend, I haven’t had a girlfriend since…” Tobin trails off, looking upset that she let that slip.

“Since who?” Christen asks, dying with curiosity.

“No one,” Tobin says, avoiding eye contact.

“When?”

“About two years ago,” Tobin says. _Two years ago? When she lost her brother?_

“Okay,” Christen says, stopping with the twenty questions.

“Okay?” Tobin echoes, looking suspicious.

“Sure. Hey, tomorrow, can I come into work a little late? I have a hair appointment.”

“No problem. What are you doing to it?” Tobin asks, sounding like she genuinely wants to know.

“Cutting it.”

Tobin freezes, turning to stare. “How short?”

Christen shows her with her hands. “Just below my shoulders.”

“You’re not cutting it,” Tobin says, frowning.

“I’m sorry?” Christen says slowly, sure she didn’t hear her right.

“I love your hair, please don’t cut it,” Tobin begs, taking a lock of Christen’s hair and staring at it.

Christen laughs at her forlorn expression. “So what? If I cut it you aren’t gonna find me attractive anymore?”

“Like that would ever happen,” Tobin mutters, running a finger down her cheek. “You don’t know just how beautiful you are, Christen.”

Christen gets goosebumps from her words.

“Listen, I…”

She stops talking when she sees a group of people walk in, the moment ruined.

*****

“I don’t like it,” Servando says for the tenth time.

“Can you act your age? And not like my father?” Christen scowls, pulling up the sweetheart neckline of her black dress. She runs her fingers through her freshly trimmed hair, loving the softness and the texture of the layers.

“I’m your brother, it’s my job to look after you. What if this asshole tries something?” he demands, looking like he’s about to lose his cool. “And for the record, I like it a lot better when you date girls.”

“It’s just a date! I’ll be back in a couple of hours. I’m not gonna bone him on the first date, Servando!” Christen explains, rolling her eyes.

Servando laughs, breaking the tension. “Keep your phone on you. Is it charged?”

“Yes, I will, and yes, it is. Calm down, baby brother,” Christen says, leaning up on her tiptoes and kissing him on the cheek.

“I’m never having daughters,” he sulks, pouring himself a scotch.

Christen shakes her head. “You’re an old soul, Servando. Must have been that time you did in jail,” Christen jokes.

“Oh, come on. It was just one night,” he says, his lip twitching.

“Well, you sure know how to make a first impression,” Christen says dryly, causing his body to shake with laughter.

“Tobin’s not gonna like this,” he states when his laughter subsides.

“Not her business,” Christen says, her voice wavering a little.

“There are things about Tobin you don’t know, I don’t think you should give up on her,” he says in a gentle tone.

“I thought you weren’t a fan of Tobin and me?”

“I wasn’t. But she’s different around you.”

The doorbell rings and Servando rushes to answer it. Everyone is hinting about Tobin, but no one will give Christen answers. It’s driving her crazy. When she sees it’s Jack at the door and not her date, Kyle, she frowns.

“Good, I caught you before your date arrives,” Jack says, smiling evilly.

“This isn’t prom, you guys,” Christen says, rubbing her temples. _I swear I feel a headache coming on._

“Yeah, but this is our first time sending you off with another man,” Servando scoffs.

“You look beautiful, Christen Annemarie,” Jack says, smiling happily.

“Please don’t use my middle name again,” Christen begs, causing both of them to laugh. “I’m serious. Annemarie, come on,” Christen groans.

Jack laughs. “You ready to go, Servando?”

“Where are you two going?”

“We have some business to deal with tonight,” Jack answers. Christen walks into her bedroom to get her bag. When she walks back out she can hear them both whispering. She leans against the door straining to hear.

“Tobin doesn’t know about her going on a date, right?” Jack asks Servando.

“Nope.”

“Good, she needs to be on her game tonight,” Jack says, sounding worried.

“She'll probably come here tonight, though. She did last time,” Servando adds. Christen walks out, narrowing her eyes at the two of them.

“What’s going on tonight?” She demands. The doorbell rings, and they both look relieved. When they both head to try and answer the door, she grabs onto their shirts.

“No way. Goodnight, both of you. You have some explaining to do when I get back.” She kisses them both on the cheek and then opens the door. Kyle stands there, in dark denim jeans and a tight white top. _I guess I’m a little overdressed._

“Hey, Kyle,” Christen says, smiling. He returns her smile, but then it suddenly drops. Christen glances behind her to see Jack standing there, an intimidating aura surrounding him.

“I’m Jack Carrasco, you heard of me, boy?” he asks Kyle. Kyle swallows and nods twice. “Right. Take care of my girl.”

“Yes, sir,” Kyle says, swallowing so hard Christen can actually see the bob of his Adam’s apple.

“Good,” Jack says, the tension clearing. “Have fun, kids.”

Christen walks to Kyle’s car, and she frowns when he doesn’t even bother to open the door for her. _I don’t think Tobin’s ever _not _opened a door for me. _It's not that Christen cares, she's more than capable of opening her own door, but it just makes the little details Tobin does to make sure she's taken care stick out in her mind that much more. Maybe she needs to stop comparing potential partners to Tobin. 

“Where are we going?” Christen asks him once they both get in.

“I was gonna take you out to dinner. But I got an invite for an event, so you’re coming with,” he says, glancing over at her like she should be happy.

“Okay.”

“After meeting your dad, I know you’re gonna like it. Fuck, I can’t believe I’m rocking up with Jack Carrasco’s daughter,” he says, sounding almost giddy.

“What do you mean?” Christen asks.

“What? Oh, nothing.”

“Explain,” Christen demands.

“It’s a surprise,” he says, turning up the music so she can’t talk.

_Dick._

They stop at one of Kyle’s friends’ houses, where he makes her sit in the car for fifteen minutes. _This is the worst date ever. I didn’t even have dinner. _Kyle finally returns and they drive to a dodgy looking warehouse.

“What is this place?” Christen asks, her eyes darting around. They walk inside and Christen sees a large crowd of people. Kyle hands the door guy two tickets, and Christen’s skin crawls when he puts his arm around her.

“Tickets are normally two hundred dollars each,” he brags.

“Good for you,” Christen mutters under her breath. Kyle leads her to a different section, and when she looks up, she freezes.

There's a caged octagon, similar to the one they have at Jack’s gym, and right in the middle is Tobin, clad in only a black sports bra and spandex. Gloves on her hands, along with tape. Her hair in braids.

“Tobin?” Christen whispers, her lips forming the word but no sound coming out. She watches as she faces off with another chick, who seems to be a tiny bit bigger than her.

“She’s fucking hot, huh? Her body is unreal,” Kyle smirks, nudging Christen when he sees Christen gawking, but he misunderstands. “Heard she’s into chicks, though.” Christen wants to slap the shit out of him.

“What is this?” Christen asks him, who flashes her a confused expression. The fight begins and Christen closes her eyes, leaning back onto a wall. She hears cheering, and yelling, so she takes a peek, just in time to see Tobin punch her opponent right in the face. Christen grins, but it only lasts a few seconds, because then Tobin takes a hit to her stomach.

Christen closes her eyes shut again.

_I can’t watch this. Can I?_

When she opens her eyes, Kyle is lost, swept away with the crowd. _He just left me. Fucking asshole._

Christen watches as they circle each other, bouncing on their heels. Tobin suddenly lifts her leg in a kick, pulls back, then comes at full force with another punch. She gets her opponent up against the cage with her arms around her, punching at the back of her head. The crowd goes wild, and Christen turns her head to look for Kyle once more, but can’t see him anywhere. She glances back towards the cage, where Tobin is the winner. She has blood dripping from her nose, but besides that, she looks untouched. The other chick, however, looks completely battered.

_Why does Tobin do this?_

_And why keep it a secret? Is this why she won’t be with me?_

A growl escapes her mouth when she sees none other than Servando, Ryan, Dom and Jack standing around Tobin, all of them picking her up and spinning her around.

Christen sees red. She doesn’t think she’s ever been so mad and hurt in her entire life. And when the blonde girl steps up next to Tobin, she loses it.

It takes her a good ten minutes to walk over to them, the crowd bumping her and she can’t walk as fast as she wishes in these heels. She’s tempted to take them off, but looking at the floor she would probably need a tetanus shot. When she finally nears them, Tobin's gone missing. Cursing under her breath, she walks up to the group of people that have become her life.

“Fancy meeting you all here,” Christen says dryly, containing her emotions.

Four pairs of eyes glance at her, with emotions ranging from shock to guilt.

“What are you doing here?” Jack growls, looking angry. _He’s angry?_

“This is where my date brought me,” Christen says, sneering the word date.

“What the fuck?” Servando roars, looking her over.

“I’m fine,” Christen assures him, throwing accusing glances at each of them. Her dad and Servando look angry, Ryan looks apologetic and Dom is smiling at her, looking like he’s relieved she finally knows.

“Where is she?” Christen asks, not needing to explain who she’s talking about. When they don’t answer, she raises her voice. “Where the fuck is she?”

“Come on, I’ll take you,” Ryan says, walking over to her. She tries to take her arm but Christen pulls away.

“Don’t be like that, Chris,” Ryan says sadly, her brow furrowing.

“You guys all lied to me. What, you don’t trust me?”

“Of course we trust you, this isn’t exactly the place for you,” Ryan says in a gentle tone that grates on Christen’s nerves.

“I’m not fragile, Ryan.” Ryan opens the exit for her and they walk out.

Christen sees Tobin leaning against a wall, wiping blood from her nose, and receiving medical attention on an area of her leg that’s banged up. She throws the towel over her shoulder, and then the blonde leans up and kisses her on her mouth.

Christen turns away, as fast as she can, tears forming in her eyes. Ryan mutters a curse behind her, and then she hears Ryan yelling Tobin’s name. Christen lets herself fall into the crowd, until she finds the entrance they came in from. She runs out, into the parking lot, and looks around, wondering what the hell she’s supposed to do now. Her phone keeps ringing and she sees Tobin, Ryan, Servando, Dom and Jack’s numbers pop up. When she sees Kyle leaning against his car, she grins. _What an unlikely savior._

“Kyle, I need a ride somewhere and you aren’t getting any action tonight,” Christen notifies him when she approaches his car.

He scowls. “Fine. Only cuz your dad will probably kill me otherwise.” She gets into his car, exhaling in relief when they get onto the main road. She puts her phone on silent, not wanting to talk to anyone right now.

“Why did you bring me there?” Christen asks.

“I always come to the fights when I can, and I didn’t wanna miss it over a date. Then when I found out who your dad was I figured you'd wanna go anyway,” he explains.

“Why? What does it have to do with my dad?”

“Your dad runs the fights, Christen,” he says, looking at her like she’s insane. Christen takes a minute to absorb this information. _Jack organizes these fights?_

_Well, that's fucking news to me._

“Where are we going?” Kyle asks, his eyes on the road.

“I don’t wanna go home,” Christen sulks.

“You can come crash at my dorm room,” he offers.

She must look suspicious because he laughs at her expression. “My roommate is away, you can sleep in his bed.”

“You sure?”

He nods, his eyes darting to her, then back on the road. "Don’t worry, I won’t let anything happen to you. I actually like my balls.”

“Where was that line of thought when you left me alone in the middle of the chaos?”

“I lost you, I tried to find you. I texted you, too,” he says.

Christen checks her phone and there's indeed a message from him asking where she is. She ignores the twenty-six missed calls and checks her messages. Five from Tobin, which she doesn’t bother to read. Instead, she texts Servando and tells him she’s safe, and she'll be home tomorrow. He replies instantly, saying to call him and he'll come and get her, but she ignores it.

“So they fight for money?” Christen assumes.

“Yep. Entrance is two hundred each, and that goes into the prize money for the winners,” Kyle explains.

“What do you know about Tobin Heath?” Christen asks.

“Besides that I wouldn’t wanna mess with her even though she’s a chick?”

Christen rolls her eyes. “She wins a lot?”

“Undefeated,” he answers, and Christen’s not surprised one bit.

“Anything else you can tell me?”

“That’s pretty much all there is to it. They follow MMA rules, they fight, and someone wins. Girls fight before the guys. Always. That about sums it up.” He parks the car and they walk to his dorm room. Christen’s surprised to find it fairly tidy.

“I’ll order us some pizza, you can relax,” he says, pushing her gently towards the couch.

Turns out Kyle isn’t so bad after all.


	8. "you're mine"

Christen waves bye to Kyle, after thanking him for letting her crash the night before. Shoes in hand, she walks barefoot to the front door, digging in her clutch for the house key. Before she can find it, the door opens and a furious looking Tobin stands there, watching Kyle’s car drive off. Christen feels a twinge of guilt when she takes in Tobin’s appearance. Dark shadows under her eyes, her face slightly pale, and her hair messily thrown into a bun, she looks like she could use a good night’s rest. Her nose is also red and swollen, where she must have been hit last night at the fight. She's only in a sports bra and sweats, and she’s barefoot. Christen walks past her, gritting her teeth when Tobin doesn’t move aside, so she has to slide her body against hers. Tobin grabs a tight hold on her wrist before she can move out of reach.

“Where were you?” Tobin asks hoarsely, her eyes full of pain.

“Out.”

Tobin curses and lets go of her but follows her to her room.

“Where is everyone?” Christen asks, placing her bag on the bed.

“Bed, they only went to sleep an hour ago. We were all worried, Christen.”

“I texted Servando and told him I was fine,” Christen says, lifting her shoulder in a slight shrug.

“How easy would it have been for someone else to send that message from your phone?” Tobin growls, threading her fingers together behind her neck.

“Why would someone do that?” Christen asks, surprised at Tobin's paranoia.

“We have enemies, Christen,” Tobin says, her tone laced with anger.

_She's angry at me? Oh, this is rich. _Christen shakes her head, not quite believing this turn of events.

“Why are you here?” Christen asks, proud of herself for keeping her voice steady.

“About last night, it wasn’t what it looked like.” Tobin reaches with her hand to touch her. Christen takes a step back, hating the defeated look that comes over Tobin.

“That’s a new line,” Christen says, the sarcasm in her tone evident.

“She kissed me. I pushed her away...” Tobin says, looking tortured.

“Okay?” Christen gestures for her to continue talking.

“And you were on a fucking date, so I didn’t even do anything wrong,” Tobin bites out.

“So you lied to me, a million times over, then you get caught kissing another girl, but you didn’t do anything wrong. I’m so happy we aren’t actually together!” Christen spits out. Her lip trembles, giving away just how hurt she is.

“You don’t mean that,” Tobin says softly, her face drawn.

“You don’t know me.”

“I know you,” Tobin replies softly, studying her.

“So, you’re an underground fighter,” Christen says, changing the subject.

Tobin curses, watching Christen’s face intently.

“How does that work exactly?” Christen asks, wanting to hear it from Tobin.

“We meet up at different locations. Spectators pay entry, two hundred dollars each, and then that money is used as the prize money. It’s just something I’ve been doing for a while,” Tobin says with a slight shrug, trying to play it off as no big deal.

Christen blinks twice, pondering her words. “Why all the secrecy?”

“There's more to it, Chris, but that’s all you need to know, alright? Now come here,” Tobin says as she hops onto the bed, pulling the sheet up for Christen to climb in.

“Why are you always with her?” Christen asks in a small voice.

“I don’t like her like that, trust me,” is all Tobin says.

“Fine, but she obviously likes you like that,” Christen snaps.

“I set her straight, she won’t be trying that shit again, okay?” Tobin says in a soothing tone.

Christen sits down on the bed next to her. “You hurt me. You kissed her. Her fucking lips were on yours.”

“I fucked up. I’m gonna fuck up. But I wanna try,” Tobin whispers, pulling her down so Christen’s head is on her chest.

“You wanna try what?” Christen asks, her voice soft and unsure.

“I wanna try with you, I don’t want you on dates with anyone else. You’re mine, Christen.” Tobin tightens her hold.

“I can’t,” Christen says in a timid voice.

“We'll talk after a few hours’ sleep, I was up all night,” Tobin says. Christen lies back on the bed, staring at the ceiling. When Tobin pulls her into her arms she holds her breath, wanting to relax into her but knowing that she shouldn’t. She can’t let her guard down.

That’s Christen’s last thought before she falls asleep.

*****

Christen wakes up two hours later, slowly extracting herself from Tobin’s arms. Servando is standing in the kitchen with Jack, both of them draining a cup of coffee.

“Mornin’,” Christen says, heading to the fridge and pulling out a water.

“What happened last night will not happen again, Christen,” Jack grinds, staring at her with an intense expression.

“What, you mean every single person I know lying to me?”

“Chris…” Servando says, his forehead crinkling.

“Why was it some big secret? So you run some illegal underground fight club, who cares? I thought you guys were up to much worse from the stories mom told me,” Christen says dryly. She takes a sip of her drink. Both Carrasco men stay silent for a few moments, and the only sound that can be heard in the kitchen is Christen drinking and swallowing.

“What did she say about me?” Jack finally rumbles.

“That you were a drug dealer, a criminal, a cheater… I could go on,” Christen tells him. And she could. Those were probably the nicer things her mother said about him, and they all know the cheating part is true.

Jack slams down his coffee mug and walks to the front door, looking pissed off. He pulls out a cigarette on the way.

“Tobin didn’t want me saying anything, Chris, and neither did Jack,” Servando says, coming towards her. He wraps her in his arms and kisses her on the head. “In the beginning, Tobin was all for telling you everything, but when you two got involved, she decided she didn’t want you to see her like that. Sometimes the other fighters play dirty, I wouldn’t be surprised if they tried something if they saw you hanging about, so it was for your safety, as well.”

“Well, you made me look stupid. I had to find out from Kyle. And I don’t like being lied to. If it’s not safe for me, how come that blonde girl gets to go?” Christen asks, staring up at him.

“She’s involved,” he says, kissing her on the head again.

“How?” Christen demands.

“You should ask Tobin, these aren’t really my secrets to tell. Or ask Ryan,” he says. _Ryan. Another person on my shit list._

“Tobin was really worried about you last night, Christen. You were selfish, next time answer your phone, okay?” he says, his voice carrying a tone he’s never spoken to her in before. He leaves the kitchen and walks down the hall.

“Maybe if Tobin kept her mouth to herself,” Christen mutters under her breath. When Jack doesn’t return after thirty minutes Christen walks outside to find him standing there.

“I’m sorry, dad.” She doesn't want him to be mad at her. He raises his head and she doesn’t like the blank look on his expression.

“I’m not perfect, Christen.”

“I don’t expect you to be,” Christen says, and it’s true, she doesn’t. She walks over to him and leans her head against his chest.

“I’m happy I came here, dad. And you don’t have to walk on eggshells around me anymore, just be yourself. I won’t judge anymore, okay?” She says into his chest.

“I want you to be comfortable here, not have to worry about our bullshit,” he replies, leading her back into the house.

“Well, I’m in it, so you’re gonna have to get used to it. You’re not getting rid of me,” Christen says with a cheeky smirk.

“Good, because I’ve never been happier, Christen. I finally have my family together,” he rumbles, clearing his throat. Christen doesn’t think her dad is generally an emotional guy, and she smiles knowing he only gets like this around her. To him, she will always be his little girl, the one he didn’t get to have in his life on a permanent basis.

“Where’s Tobin?” he asks, about to head home.

“Asleep.”

He sighs. “Alright, I hope you know what you’re doing.”

_I have no idea what I’m doing._

She says bye to Jack and then walks back into the bedroom, where Tobin is still fast asleep on her stomach. Her face looks so relaxed as she sleeps, even with the slight bruising on her face. The sheet is sitting just over her ass, so Christen gets a clear view of her toned back.

_I've never seen a more perfect human._

Christen goes through her phone, seeing a message from Ryan saying to call her when she wakes up. She deletes the rest of the messages from last night and clears all her call lists.

“Mornin’, beautiful,” Tobin says, her voice thick with sleep.

“Morning. How’s your face?” Christen asks, frowning.

“It’s fine.” Tobin sits up in the bed. “Come here.”

Christen walks over to the bed and sits next to her, Tobin’s hands grabbing her before her butt hits the mattress.

“Come spend the day with me at my place,” Tobin whispers into her ear.

“What exactly changed between yesterday and today, Tobin?” Christen asks, completely confused with the situation.

“I’m done fighting myself. I want you so bad, Chris. You’re mine, I’ve known it since the moment I laid my eyes on you.”

“You were rude to me that day,” Christen reminds her.

“I didn’t want to want you,” Tobin says, and even though she’s being honest, it kinda hurts.

“That’s romantic,” Christen says dryly.

“It’s real, Christen,” Tobin replies, kissing her on the cheek.

“I need to know about her first,” Christen demands, and something instantly shifts in the air.

“She’s my sibling’s ex-girlfriend,” Tobin admits after a few moments of silence. _Ryan’s ex? Why didn’t she say anything?_

“What’s her name?” Christen asks.

“Allie.”

“Why is she always around you? And why did you let her kiss you?” Christen asks, her voice gaining steel.

“I pushed her away, Christen,” Tobin growls, and Christen can tell she’s getting annoyed. _Well, too damn bad._

“Clearly not soon enough!” Christen snaps.

“Who did you go on a date with last night?” Tobin counters, turning it around on her.

“What’s your problem? We aren’t even together,” Christen says defensively, narrowing her eyes at her.

“Exactly,” Tobin smirks, obviously feeling like she won this round.

“That doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt, Tobin,” Christen says softly, avoiding eye contact.

Tobin curses. “I didn’t want her. I only want you, Christen. You’ve gotten under my skin.”

“At least I didn’t kiss my date,” Christen says with a scowl.

“And you won’t get a chance to,” Tobin says with finality. Christen wants to stay mad, but they stare at each other for a few moments, and as usual, Tobin’s eyes penetrate through her every defense.

_What is it about her?_

“Will you come to my next fight?” Tobin asks, suddenly looking a little unsure. Her fingers drum on the comforter, waiting for a reply.

“I have to warn you, I closed my eyes through most of the one last night,” Christen admits, scrunching her nose. Tobin chuckles, shaking her head at her in amusement.

“How often do you fight?” Christen asks.

“There’s a fight every week, but I usually go once every few weeks or sometimes once a month. There are only certain opponents I’m interested in fighting,” Tobin tells her, tracing down Christen’s collarbone with her finger. When her finger reaches the top of her breast, Christen raises an eyebrow.

“Where does that finger think it's going?” Christen asks, smiling.

“I want you, when you’re ready,” Tobin says, kissing her on her temple.

“And if I’m ready right now?”

“I’ll know when you’re ready, baby. Now get ready, because I’m taking you to my house.” Tobin gets out of the bed and walks out of the room.

***

“Can you at least look at me?” Ryan asks, standing next to Christen as she takes a handful of popcorn.

Christen glances up at her, sighing like it’s a big deal. “What, Ryan?”

“Don’t be mad, Chris, come on. I had to follow my sister’s wishes and she didn’t want me telling you anything,” Ryan says, her eyes pleading with Christen’s, begging for her to understand.

“You all made me look stupid,” Christen grumbles, sliding over on the couch so Ryan can take a seat next to her.

“That wasn’t our intention,” Ryan says, grabbing a handful of popcorn.

“So I’ve heard.”

“Don’t be stubborn and just forgive me,” Ryan says, throwing Christen one of her irresistible smiles.

“Doesn’t work on me, Ryan, but nice try.”

Ryan laughs and then sobers. “I’ll make it up to you, alright? I promise.”

“You better.”

Tobin walks out, freshly showered, in a pair of basketball shorts slung low on her hips. Christen sighs in appreciation.

“Why don’t you drool over me like that?” Ryan mock sulks.

“You just don’t do it for me, Ry,” Christen teases.

“I look exactly like her!” Ryan chuckles, shoving another hand of popcorn in her mouth.

“No, you don’t, I think your beer drinking is causing your abs to disintegrate,” Christen jokes, laughing when she sees the look on Ryan’s face. She narrows her eyes, and runs her hand up her abs, lifting the shirt up with the movement.

“Don’t think so, babe, trust me, I’ve been getting no complaints,” Ryan says, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively.

“Don’t you have somewhere to be, Ryan?” Tobin asks expectantly.

“Nope. I’m good right here, with my two fave people,” Ryan says, smiling.

Tobin grunts, and inserts herself next to Christen on the other side. “Hey, baby,” she says, her lip tilting upwards.

_I get butterflies every time she calls me that._

“Hi, pretty girl,” Christen says in a soft voice, Tobin’s scent engulfing her. “You smell good,” she blurts out.

Tobin’s eyes smile at her. “What are we watching?” she asks, putting her arm around Christen and pulling her closer.

Christen presses play on the remote. “The Notebook.”

They both object.

“This is our punishment, isn’t it?” Tobin asks, heaving a heavy sigh.

Christen grins. Ryan mumbles something about her being evil, while Tobin raises an eyebrow in amusement.

Then they watch the movie.


	9. "more secrets"

Tobin opens the door for Christen as they walk into the restaurant. This is their first official date, and Christen’s a little nervous. She plays with the charm on her handbag, twisting it around her fingers. They sit in a booth, side by side.

“I’m pretty sure you’re supposed to sit on the other side,” Christen says, grinning.

“Then I can’t touch you, so it doesn’t work for me.”

“Who are you and what have you done with Tobin?” Christen jokes, nudging her with her elbow.

“It’s me,” Tobin whispers, then proceeds to bury her face in the crook of Christen's neck and shoulder. A shiver of pleasure takes over Christen’s body.

“Tobin!” Christen chastises, looking around to see if anyone is watching.

“So innocent,” Tobin croons, looking pleased. Christen realizes that this is Tobin with her guard down. She's letting Christen see her, without all the shields she usually has in place. The thought makes Christen feel lucky, that Tobin chose to share this side of herself with her.

“What are we eating?” Christen asks as she looks over the menu. They both order their meals when the waitress arrives.

“Does it annoy you that I’m older than you?” Tobin asks once their drinks arrive.

“Does it annoy you that I’m younger than you?” Christen returns.

“No, nothing about you annoys me,” Tobin says, pausing. “No, that’s a lie.”

Christen slaps her arm playfully. “It doesn’t bother me. You’re what, twenty-five, right?”

“Yes. That’s three years older than you,” Tobin says, rubbing her hands over her face.

“I know, I can do math. And it’s not bad at all,” Christen says defensively, sipping her drink.

“It doesn’t matter anyway,” Tobin says, staring into her eyes.

“Why?”

“In too deep,” is all she says.

Their food soon arrives and they dig in. Christen gets a message from Ryan, who's mad she couldn’t come with, and is instead stuck at the bar. Christen starts laughing when she sees the picture of Ryan making a sad face. Tobin groans when Christen shows her.

“I feel bad she’s at the bar by herself,” Christen says with a full mouth.

“We can stop by after.”

“Sounds good. Where’s Ash tonight?” Christen asks.

“Family stuff,” Tobin says, watching Christen as she licks her fork. Christen’s eyes dart to the middle of the room when she hears her name being called.

_Kyle._

_Oh, shit._

He walks over, smiling warmly, until he sees who Christen’s date is.

“I guess now I know why you were asking about her,” Kyle mutters awkwardly, clearing his throat.

“Hey, Kyle,” Christen says, not wanting to be rude. He did help her out the other night, and he ended up being pretty cool.

“Tobin, this is Kyle,” Christen introduces, sighing when she sees the look Tobin is shooting at Kyle.

Kyle shifts on his feet, looking nervous. “I, uh, I just wanted to say hello. I guess I’ll see you around, Christen,” he says, walking away as quickly as he can.

“That was rude,” Christen says, the air in the room so thick and uncomfortable, it's making her feel awkward.

“That’s who you went on a date with?” Tobin asks incredulously.

“Yeah.”

“He’s a kid,” Tobin snaps.

“Actually, he’s my age,” Christen says, cringing.

Tobin curses and stares down at her plate. Her jaw tenses and she stays silent, ignoring Christen.

“Babe,” Christen says softly, trying to diffuse the situation. “The date didn’t work out, so we ended up hanging out as friends.” 

“You stayed the night with him?” Tobin asks, more like a statement than a question.

“Well, yeah, I slept in his roommate's empty bed,” Christen says.

“Fucking hell,” Tobin growls, her grip on the table turning her knuckles white.

“Well, maybe if you weren’t kissing Allie and keeping secrets from me, I would have never gone on a date with anyone!” Christen yells, losing her temper.

“You know, Christen, when you forgive someone, the decent thing to do is not throw it back in their face every fucking chance you get. You think I don’t regret it? Don’t feel like shit about keeping you in the dark? And having to see Allie kiss me, even though I pushed her off me?”

Tobin's words make Christen feel like complete shit.

“Tobin…”

“Let’s go,” Tobin says, standing up and walking to the register to pay. She doesn’t even look back or wait. Christen grabs her purse and walks to the front, following Tobin outside to her car. She opens the door for Christen, even in her anger, and Christen gets in without a word.

“Can you take me home?” Christen asks, her voice uneven.

Tobin drums her fingers on the steering wheel but doesn’t answer. Then she exhales loudly. “I don’t want you to go, yet.”

“You have a funny way of showing it,” Christen says, looking out the window to distract herself from Tobin’s profile.

“I just don’t like the thought of you out with some guy, sleeping at his fucking house. I’m sorry,” Tobin says, her eyes on the road. Christen glances at her, the scar on her jaw clearly noticeable from this angle. Christen leans over and runs her finger along it, hating that Tobin flinches and moves her face away.

“It’s clear by all your shit I put up with that I only want you, Tobin, no need to be jealous,” Christen says, rolling her eyes.

“I’m not jealous,” Tobin huffs.

“Of course you aren’t, baby,” Christen coos.

Tobin grins. “That’s the first time you’ve called me baby.”

“You like it?”

Tobin nods, the shift in her mood obvious. “Okay, maybe I was a little bit jealous,” she admits.

“Trust me, I know,” Christen says with a smirk. Tobin suddenly pulls the car over.

“What are you doing?” Christen gapes, her eyes going wide. Tobin smiles at her before leaning over and tangling one hand in her hair. Her other hand tilts Christen’s chin up, as she brings their lips together. She kisses Christen gently, three times, before going in deeper, opening her mouth and tasting. When she pulls her lips away, Christen’s left breathless, wanting more.

“So beautiful,” Tobin murmurs, pulling back onto the road.

“What was that for?” Christen asks, touching her lips.

“I’ve always wanted to kiss that smirk off your face,” Tobin says, grinning.

“Well, you did just that.” Now it’s Tobin looking smug.

Tobin puts on some music, and a Rihanna song flares through the speakers.

“What music do you like?” Tobin asks.

“A bit of everything. But I mainly listen to rap music.”

“Rap?” Tobin repeats, cringing.

“Yes, rap,” Christen says defensively. When Tobin starts laughing, she scowls.

“There is nothing wrong with rap music,” Christen tells her.

Tobin lifts a shoulder in a shrug. “Just didn’t see you as a rap kinda girl.”

“What kinda girl am I?”

“Mine,” Tobin says, smiling. Christen stares at her profile for a moment, a feeling of contentment taking over her.

“Does that bullshit work on other girls?” Christen jokes.

“I wouldn’t know, you’re the first one I’ve ever felt possessive of,” Tobin says seriously.

“Hmm.”

“What are you thinking about?” Tobin asks, turning her head.

“You.”

“What about me?” Tobin asks.

“Are you ever going to tell me how you got the scar?” Christen decides to ask.

Tobin is silent for a few minutes before answering. “I’ll tell you when I’m ready, okay?”

“Okay.” Christen smiles when Tobin takes her hand into one of her own, threading their fingers together. Christen knows this is Tobin telling her, although she may need time, she isn’t going to shut her out, and Christen appreciates it.

When they arrive at the bar, Christen finds that it’s actually pretty busy. _Poor Ryan._

“Maybe you should hire someone else?” Christen tells Tobin, eyeing all the cars parked out front.

“Yeah, I had a few people apply,” Tobin says, opening the door for Christen to enter.

“What about Servando or Dom?” Christen asks.

“Dom is a full-time mechanic, I don’t think he would wanna work at the bar. I can ask Servando,” Tobin says. They walk up to the bar, and Christen offers Ryan an apologetic smile. Tobin was supposed to work tonight, but insisted on taking Christen out to dinner, and Ryan said it was no problem. Christen ties her hair up in a ponytail and washes her hands before starting to serve the few customers still waiting. Tobin heads into the back, needing to stock up on a few things.

“How was dinner?” Ryan asks in between customers.

Christen makes a vodka sunrise as she answers. “It was good!”

“Didn’t even bring any back for me,” Ryan sulks.

“You guys should start serving food here,” Christen tells her, hoping for this outcome on one or more occasions.

Ryan chuckles. “We should, shouldn’t we? I’m sure if you ask Tobin she might.”

Speaking of the devil, Tobin walks out of the office, holding a stack of bottles and putting them in the fridge. When she bends over Christen gets a nice view of her ass, which she happily ogles. She sighs in admiration, until Ryan nudges her, and gestures to a waiting customer.

After Christen's done serving the customer, Servando walks in, looking hurt.

“Servando, what happened?” Christen asks, running over to him. He's definitely been in a fight. His knuckles are bloody and battered, and his lip is cut and swollen.

He shrugs, playing off her concern. “Don’t worry about it, sis, just a small incident.” Tobin walks over and tells Servando to go into the office.

“Tobin…”

“Stay here, Chris, let me talk to him,” Tobin says softly, looking concerned. Ryan gently takes Christen’s arm and leads her back behind the bar. Christen sees Ryan do a double take when she takes in the face of a pretty brunette that walked into the bar after Servando.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Ryan growls, her face contorting in anger.

The girl puts her hands up in submission. “I’m just here for a drink.”

“You’re never just here for a drink,” Ryan says, calming down.

“You think she was gonna take me back after what happened?” The girl asks dryly.

“No, I guess not,” Ryan says, reluctance in her tone. Ryan pours her a drink anyway, and doesn’t say another word to her.

“I still care about her, Ryan,” The brunette says, her eyes softening. _What the hell? _Christen assumes the person she's talking about is Tobin and Christen bites her lip, thinking. The girl is pretty, but for some reason, Christen can't see them together; she can't see her being Tobin's type. Then again, at the end of the day, did Christen even see her own self as Tobin's type?

The girl waits for Ryan to respond, but after Ryan gives her nothing, she turns her back on them and leaves.

“What was that about?” Christen asks, pissed that she’s left in the dark again. When Ryan doesn’t reply, Christen storms to the office. Just as she pulls the door open, Servando walks out, bumping into her.

“You okay?” Christen asks gently, lifting her hand to touch his face.

“Fine, Chris,” he says with a smile. She looks behind him to Tobin, who has a pensive look on her face.

“What happened?” Christen demands.

“Went to a girl’s house, her ex came over and we got into it,” Servando answers, casual as ever.

“Do we have a first aid kit here?”

“Christen, don’t fuss over me. I’m going home, and I’m fine.” He kisses Christen on top of her head. “Cute having you worrying about me, though.”

“I'm always worried about you,” Christen says gently, eyeing his busted lip.

She looks at Tobin and says, “I’m gonna go home with Servando, okay?”

Tobin frowns, but nods. Christen walks up to her and kisses her on the cheek. “See you tomorrow?” Tobin asks, a hopeful look on her face.

“Yeah, I’ll come over and bring you lunch.”

“Sounds good.”

Servando and Christen go straight home, where she takes care of his face and knuckles and tells him to go to bed. After grumbling and growling at her, he finally listens, and Christen smiles as his bedroom door closes.

***

After her first class, Christen sits in the library, going over everything she learned that day. She's a little rusty, and she’s definitely going to be doing a lot of studying.

Someone takes a seat opposite her, which is a little weird considering there are multiple empty tables. She lifts her gaze and sees it’s a guy who looks to be in his early twenties. He has dark hair and eyes, a strong jaw and high cheekbones. His arms are bulky with muscle, not Christen’s type, but she can still appreciate his looks. Christen’s lips curve into a slight smile as she turns back down to her books. When she feels his eyes on her, she looks up to see him studying her.

“It’s rude to stare,” Christen whispers, raising an eyebrow.

He tilts his head at her, and Christen’s curious about the indecision she sees flash over his expression. He looks down at his own book and opens it, not saying anything back to her, so she continues with her own work. After an hour, she stands up, flashing a smile before she leaves. She gets in her car and drives straight to the bar. She has an hour before she starts her shift, so she has time to change and sneak in a few kisses with Tobin.

Singing along to the radio, she parks her car and hops out, surprised to see Servando standing out front, watching her. Ever since Tobin's fight, Servando has been keeping a closer eye on her, and she has no idea why. She walks up to him, grinning as she sees him wearing the new T-shirt she bought him.

“You’re wearing it!” Christen says in greeting.

“Told you I love it, and I meant it.”

“Good. You’re a bit early to start drinking, bro,” Christen says, stepping up on her tiptoes to kiss him on the cheek. She pulls her bag off her shoulder, holding it in her hands.

“Everyone is here,” Servando says, following her inside. She walks in and beams, because he's right, everyone is here. Jack, Dom, Ryan, Tobin and a few of their other friends. Ash is at the bar alone, currently texting on her phone as usual. Christen says hello to everyone, laughing when Ryan runs up to hug her first.

“What’s the occasion?” Christen asks Tobin as she walks up to her and gives her a peck on the lips.

“Got an important fight this weekend, baby,” Tobin says, watching Christen’s face for her reaction.

“Am I invited to this one?” Christen asks dryly, a little bite in her tone.

“I hope you'll come to every fight from now on,” Tobin says, gripping Christen by her hips and pulling her down onto her lap. “But you'll have to stay with the group, not going anywhere alone, you hear me?”

“I’m sure I can manage that.”

“You okay with this?” Tobin asks softly, and Christen knows she means the whole fighting thing.

“Does it matter?” Christen replies, knowing that it doesn’t. This means something to Tobin, and there's no way Christen’s going to stand in her way. This is Tobin, and Christen will take her as she comes. As long as she doesn’t cheat on her, or anything like that, and she treats her well and they make each other happy, Christen will support her. Yes, she’s worried about Tobin getting hurt, but it’s her decision, not Christen’s.

“You know it does,” Tobin says into her throat. Christen looks up and catches her dad watching her, so she quickly pushes Tobin away. _Awkward._

“How was class, Christen?” Jack asks, smiling at her obvious discomfort.

“It was good, I know I’m going to enjoy it,” Christen tells him.

“Proud of you,” he says, lifting up his drink in a toast.

Trying not to get emotional, Christen says thank you, and clears her throat. Tobin squeezes her thigh, obviously seeing right through her. Christen can’t help it though, she never thought she would see the day when she'd hear her dad say things like that to her. They just hang out and talk for a little while, until it’s time for Christen to start her shift. She changes, clocks in, and then takes over from Ash, who heads out for her break.

The night passes quickly, and before Christen knows it, it’s closing time. Ryan is sitting at the bar, going over some paperwork, while Tobin is doing stock take. Ash already left, so Christen finishes wiping down all the counters when she sees Allie standing at the entrance, knocking on the locked door.

“Ryan, why is Allie at the door?” Christen asks, raising an eyebrow. Ryan walks around the bar, and towards the door, unlocking it and letting her enter.

“What are you doing here?” Ryan asks her, her tone neither friendly nor hostile.

“I haven’t seen you or Tobin in a while so I thought I would drop by,” Allie says, sounding a little unsure. Christen slaps the cloth down on the table and walks to the back. Tobin is sitting there, typing on her laptop. She looks adorable, her brow furrowing in concentration.

“Allie is here,” Christen announces, trying to keep a poker face.

“What?” Tobin asks, standing up. Christen can tell by the look on her face she wasn’t expecting her.

Christen walks back out without answering, just in time to hear Allie say, “It’s not fair I don’t get to be in Tobin’s life because of her insecurities!” 

“That’s enough,” Tobin growls, walking past Christen, stroking her arm as she does so.

“Christen, this is Allie. Allie, Christen is my girlfriend, my first priority. You need to understand that,” Tobin says, reaching for Christen's hand.

“So, what, you and I can’t even be friends anymore?” Allie gasps, tears forming in her eyes. Christen looks at Ryan, who looks agitated. _I’m so confused right now, isn’t she Ryan’s ex?_

“Why are you being so fucking difficult, Al?” Tobin sighs, letting Christen go and lacing her hands behind her head.

“Because this bitch came along and stole my only connection to my dead boyfriend! We had a plan, Tobin, and this is fucking it all up!” Allie screeches, and Christen cringes. _Dead boyfriend? Fuck. Tobin’s brother that passed away, Mikey. This is his ex-girlfriend?_

“If you cared so much about your ex-boyfriend why were you trying to kiss his sister?” Christen spits out, feeling guilty when Allie’s face pales. She clutches her hands over her chest dramatically, and her bottom lip trembles.

“Christen,” Tobin admonishes, and then Christen really loses her temper.

“So don’t Christen me! I assumed she was Ryan’s ex, since you didn’t specify which sibling, and now she’s playing the guilt card? Well, she didn’t look fucking guilty when she was trying to kiss you! This act she’s pulling!” Christen gestures to her. “It's not working. It's manipulative,” she growls the last word, stepping away from Tobin.

“You don’t know anything, you have been in their lives for a second! I’ve been here for years,” Allie says smugly, her damsel in distress routine ending.

“This isn’t a competition,” Christen says, her palms clenching into fists.

“Well if it is, you lose. They won’t choose you over me!” Allie snaps, crossing her arms over her chest. “Well, at least one of them won’t. You enjoy them both, don’t you?”

Ryan shifts uneasily. Christen sees red.

“Allie, that’s enough!” Tobin roars, clearly having had enough drama. Christen ignores her and walks over to Ryan, really needing to talk to her in that moment.

“Ryan, can you take me home?” Christen asks. She sees Ryan look around her to Tobin, before looking down at her, grimacing.

“I want to, Chris, but I think my sister will kill me in my sleep,” Ryan mock whispers. Christen turns around and pins Tobin with a stare.

“Ryan is taking me to your place, you deal with this,” Christen tells her, daring her to argue.

“Fine,” Tobin grits, “but you aren’t gonna use this against me later.” Christen rolls her eyes, unable to deny that Tobin knows her pretty damn well. Tobin walks over to her and kisses her deeply, her hands tangling in her hair. Christen pulls away.

“See you soon,” Christen says, walking to the front door. Ryan catches up, and they walk together to her car. They don’t say anything until they're both inside the car and Ryan starts the engine.

“Begin your hundred questions,” Ryan grumbles, reversing the car.

“She was your brother’s ex,” Christen starts.

“Yes.”

“When he passed away…” Christen looks at Ryan as she says it, watching several emotions cross her face.

“I’m sorry,” Christen says quietly.

“Go on.”

“She still stayed friends with the both of you. What I want to know, is why she and Tobin are more attached to each other, and you…”

“I’ve let go of the anger. That’s the truth. When Mikey died, we were both devastated. We felt anger, sorrow, pain, guilt. He was our baby brother, and we couldn’t protect him. We wanted someone to pay for his death, someone to blame. Allie felt all of those things, too, and she and Tobin now have a common goal. I felt the same at the start, but after a year, I realized Mikey sure as hell wouldn’t want this for us, our mother wouldn’t want this, either. So I pulled out of the fighting ring, and I’m trying to move on with my life. I'll always love and remember Mikey, but this obsessive need for revenge isn’t what any of us need,” Ryan explains. Christen’s left confused.

“What does the fighting have to do with your brother and revenge?” Christen asks. Ryan gives her a sympathetic glance, realizing Tobin has told her pretty much nothing.

“Mikey was the one who participated in the underground fighting. Tobin and I were both in school. Mikey had a fight one night, and he died in that ring,” Ryan says, her voice wavering on the last sentence.

“So Tobin wants to, what? Fight because her brother did?”

“No, Tobin wants to fight the current champion. Which happens to be the girlfriend of the guy who killed Mikey,” Ryan says bitterly. _An eye for an eye?_

Christen’s mouth opens wide in shock. “And Allie is egging her on?”

“Yes.”

_That little-_

“What if something happens to her?” Christen asks.

Ryan shrugs. “She originally wanted to fight the dude, she was literally losing her mind, but your dad would never let that happen. I’ve tried to talk her out of it, to let it go, but Tobin does what Tobin wants to do.”

“More secrets,” Christen says, unable to hide the bitterness in her voice.

“She doesn’t want to scare you off, she’s terrified you’re going to run,” Ryan says.

“Is that what she said?” Christen asks, turning in her seat.

“Not in so many words, but I know my sister. Also to protect you. Tobin is like that. I know she cares about you a lot, Christen. I’ve never seen her with any girl the way she is with you.”

Christen wrings her hands, not knowing what to say to that. “I don’t like being lied to.”

“She didn’t really lie,” Ryan says, defending Tobin.

“Semantics,” Christen mutters.

“You’re so cute when you sulk,” Ryan teases.

“I’m glad you think so.”

They arrive at the apartment and walk up the stairs. “Since we're having a deep and meaningful conversation, you gonna tell me what _really_ happened with Servando the night he got into that fight?”

“Was I even at the bar that day?”

“Yes,” Christen growls. “I know you know what happened. You guys gossip like old maids.”

Ryan rubs her hand over her hair, making a sound in her throat. “Raptor has friends, they aren’t fans of ours. Whenever we run into each other, let’s just say shit doesn’t always turn out well.”

“Raptor?” Christen replies, scoffing.

“Yeah, that’s what they call him in the ring.”

“What do they call Tobin?” Christen asks as Ryan unlocks the door and waits for her to enter.

“Girls don’t really use nicknames. It’s kind of lame, if you ask me.”

Christen laughs, agreeing. “I’m glad. The whole name thing is kind of dorky, huh?”

Ryan nods, laughing, opening the fridge. “Want a drink?” 

“You guys got me my favorite?” Christen perks up at the sight of Ryan pulling out a bottle of her favorite wine.

“Tobin did,” Ryan says, closing the fridge.

“Really?” Christen asks in a hopeful voice.

"Is this real life?" Ryan teases Christen as she pours a glass, smiling.

“Fuck, how can I be mad at her when she does cute and thoughtful things like this?” Christen grumbles, taking the glass from Ryan.

“Someone’s easily pleased,” Ryan says, her eyes sparkling with amusement.

“Was that a sexual innuendo?” Christen asks dryly.

“No, but it could be one,” Ryan chuckles.

“Let’s watch Bachelor in Paradise,” Christen says, walking over to the couch.

“You love this show.”

“Yeah, cuz it’s awesome,” Christen says in a matter of fact tone. She gets comfy on the couch, just as Tobin walks in, Allie in tow. She has tears pouring down her face, and she’s sniffling dramatically.

“What’s she doing here?” Christen demands, her hand twitching.

Allie walks towards the bathroom and Tobin sits down next to Christen. “She was crying and crying, I couldn’t just leave her there.”

Christen glances at Ryan, and then back at Tobin. “So… What? She’s staying the night here?”

“What? No!” Tobin says, taking Christen’s hand into hers. She rubs her fingers while Christen’s hand lays there non-responsive like dead weight.

“Right. I’m going home, you deal with Miss I-Can-Cry-On-Cue,” Christen tells her.

“For fuck's sake, you’re not going anywhere, Christen,” Tobin says, sounding like she thinks Christen is the one in the wrong here.

“I don’t share well, Tobin,” Christen whispers so only she can hear.

“And I don’t expect you to,” Tobin says, her eyes searching through her thick dark lashes.

“No, I think that you do. I get it, she’s a link to your brother, and I’m not asking you to give that up. But there has to be some kind of boundaries.”

“She doesn’t usually act like this. Look, my baby brother loved her, he wanted to marry her. What am I supposed to do?” Tobin asks, distress flickering across her face.

Hating seeing Tobin like this, Christen gets up and walks to the bathroom. She taps on the door once before she enters. Allie looks genuinely upset, her tear-stained cheeks blotchy.

“Finally, some real emotion,” Christen says wryly, leaning against the door frame.

“Yeah, well, I don’t want to lose Tobin and Ryan. They were supposed to be my sisters one day,” Allie says, her throat scratchy.

“Why did you kiss her?” Christen asks straight out.

Allie’s head comes up sharply. “I was losing her, and I was desperate. I didn’t plan it, it just happened. It was a mistake. I'd never do that to Mikey,” she says softly, and Christen actually catches a glimpse of the real Allie. The human inside.

“Look, I'd never tell Tobin to stay away from you, but we need to get a few things straight first.”

Allie looks suspicious. “Like what?”

“You do not manipulate Tobin into doing whatever you want, using guilt as a tool,” Christen says, her eyes showing just how serious she is.

“What? I don’t do that!”

“Shut up and listen. If those frosted lips, or any other body part even come close to Tobin…” Christen trails off, letting her tone get her point across for her.

“I won’t, I promise. She doesn’t want me anyway,” Allie says, wiping her tears away.

“As long as that’s understood. Come on, let’s go watch TV,” Christen says, walking out of the bathroom and back to the couch.

As Christen plops down next to her, Tobin looks worried. “Everything okay?”

Christen nods, pressing play on the show and smiling as Tobin wraps her in her arms. Allie walks out a few moments later, and silently takes a seat. Tobin nibbles on Christen’s ear. “Thank you.”

“I have my moments,” Christen mumbles, pressing her face against Tobin's happily.


	10. "you were made for me"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello all! Sorry for the long delay. Updates will come quicker now. I hope everyone is staying safe and staying inside. Blessings to you all in these uncertain times. Thank you for reading.

As Christen drives home after visiting Jack, she decides to drop by Tobin’s and say hello. She has an hour before she starts at the bar, and Christen knows Tobin’s been training all day. _She must be exhausted_. Her fight is tomorrow night, and Christen thinks she’s more nervous than Tobin is. Christen knocks on the door, rolling her eyes when Ryan opens it wearing nothing but a pair of boxer shorts and a sports bra.

“Expecting someone else?” Christen asks dryly, leaning on the wall.

Ryan grins, then looks a little uncomfortable.

“Oh, god, what am I interrupting?” Christen covers her face with her hands.

“Nothing yet,” Ryan says, smirking.

“Tobin?”

“Not home yet, she should be here any second, though.”

“So, you aren’t going to invite me in?” Christen says, her body shaking with laughter.

Ryan scowls and hesitantly opens the door. “Ash by herself?”

“Hired a new girl, so it’s less strain now,” Ryan says, closing the door behind her. Christen can hear a girl talking on the phone from the other room and makes a face. 

“Do you want me to tell her to go?” Ryan asks, frowning.

“No, no. Don’t worry about me. I’ll head into Tobin’s room.”

“You sure? You know you’re more important. Family is more important,” Ryan says, looking conflicted.

“You don’t need to kick her out on my behalf. I’ll go wait in Tobin’s room. Enjoy yourself,” Christen says, kissing Ryan on the cheek because she is just that sweet.

Christen makes herself welcome in Tobin’s bed, burying herself under the comforter. When she hears Tobin’s voice saying, “What the fuck, Ryan? In the kitchen? At least go into your room!” Christen starts laughing. Tobin opens the door, her face brightening as soon as she sees Christen lying in her bed.

“Fuck, you’re a sight for sore eyes,” Tobin says, kneeling at the bed.

“I missed you, so I thought I'd come to see you before work,” Christen says, leaning over for a kiss.

“You look so sexy in my bed,” Tobin says huskily, moving closer for another taste. She sucks on Christen’s bottom lip, pulling away too soon. Christen makes a sound of complaint, earning her Tobin’s signature grin.

“I’m gonna take a quick shower. Stay right where you are,” Tobin says, leaving the room. Christen flips over and sighs into Tobin’s pillow. They haven’t had sex, and Tobin seems to be content with taking things slow. Christen, on the other hand, wants her. _Bad._

She’s thinking up seduction techniques when Tobin walks back in, dressed in only a towel. Christen sits up in bed, her eyes devouring. Tobin’s arms have the perfect amount of muscle, and her legs are toned to perfection. It makes Christen's mouth water.

Tobin clears her throat and Christen’s eyes quickly dart to hers. “I forgot my clothes to change into,” she says, sounding slightly sheepish.

“Tobin?”

“Yeah,” Tobin says in a low tone.

“Can I touch you?” Christen asks in a soft whisper. Tobin doesn’t reply, but takes the few steps between them, reaching the bed. Christen sits up on her knees. She places a soft kiss on the top of Tobin's collarbone and places her hands on her stomach, feeling Tobin’s muscles tense through the fabric of the towel the second Christen’s lips make contact with her neck. Tobin’s towel drops and Christen lifts her hand up tentatively, tracing the lines of her abs and running her fingers down her chest and breasts, their eyes staying locked together. Tobin watches her through heavy-lidded eyes, the shades darker than usual. Christen sinks her teeth into her bottom lip, and Tobin inhales deeply at the action. In a swift movement, Tobin’s strong hands grip Christen’s hips as she lifts her off the bed, and puts Christen down on the floor so she’s standing. Tobin’s gaze is so intense, so probing.

“Are you sure you want this?” Tobin asks, her voice raspy. The sound turns Christen on even more.

The word ‘yes’ barely leaves her mouth, when Tobin takes Christen’s face into her hands and kisses her hungrily. Tobin’s tongue begs entrance, her rough moan penetrating the air when Christen opens and lets her in.

Christen can’t get enough of her.

Her taste.

Her passion.

Tobin starts kissing down her neck, trailing hot, wet kisses that leave Christen gasping. She doesn’t think there's anyone that can kiss as well as Tobin Heath. If this is a preview for more things to come…

Tobin pulls away to lift Christen’s top. Her intense gaze rakes over her black lacy bra and a growl of pleasure sounds deep in Tobin’s throat. She unbuttons Christen’s jeans and slides down the zipper. Licking her full bottom lip, Tobin slides her thumb to the back of Christen’s jeans, and gently tugs down, until they sit just below her ass. Christen’s underwear is plain black cotton, as she wasn’t really expecting anything to happen between them tonight. She feels shy for a moment, until Tobin says, “You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”

Christen wriggles a little until her jeans fall to the floor, and she’s left standing in front of Tobin in just her undergarments. Tobin traces her hipbone with a long finger. Christen leans forward for another kiss and then steps back to really look at Tobin. Christen gasps as she takes her in, naked in all of her glory. Strong, muscular thighs, full pouted lips, and… _Holy shit, she’s literally golden. _Christen reaches down to cup her, only to find Tobin soaking. The feeling leaves her out of breath. She bites her lower lip, her gaze touching roaming over Tobin’s abs, breasts and shoulders before reaching Tobin’s amused eyes.

“Wow,” Christen says, her vocabulary leaving her. Tobin leans closer, so their bodies are touching. They both moan at the contact, and Christen blushes at Tobin’s bare body pressed firmly against her. _She is rock hard. Solid. _Christen can feel the heat coming from Tobin’s naval and she looks down and back up.

“I think something wants me,” Christen says, flashing an innocent look at Tobin.

“I _know _something wants you,” Tobin answers hoarsely, walking Christen back to the edge of the bed, pushing her gently so she’s sitting. When Tobin drops to her knees in front of her, Christen licks her lips nervously. The gesture makes Tobin lose her last ounce of control, as she leans closer and captures their lips in a demanding kiss. Christen runs her fingers through her hair, pulling gently as Tobin takes her mouth. She licks, bites and tastes, until Christen’s begging for more.

“Please, Tobin,” Christen whimpers, as Tobin pulls her underwear down, taking her time.

As soon as the words leave her mouth, Tobin lifts Christen’s legs over her shoulders and starts to lick and kiss up the inside of Christen’s inner thigh. When Tobin reaches her core and starts to slowly lick, Christen shudders with pleasure. Tobin moans, and knowing that she enjoys tasting her so much heightens Christen’s desire. Tobin pays special attention to her clit, licking and sucking, causing Christen to squirm. Tangling her fingers in Tobin’s hair, Christen lifts her hips up, grinding against Tobin’s face, trying to get as close to her as she can. Warmth soon pools in her lower belly, and when Tobin sucks on her clit once more, streams of pleasure shoot up Christen’s spine, blinding her with its intensity.

“Tobin,” Christen calls out, panting as wave after wave washes over her, her thighs trembling. Tobin doesn’t stop until the last tremor leaves her body, and Christen sags back onto the bed. _That was amazing._

_No - earth-shattering._

Tobin lifts her face, their eyes locked together as she slowly wipes her mouth with the back of her hand. _Okay, that was fucking hot. _Christen grabs Tobin’s hand and pulls her down so Tobin’s lying on top of her.

“I love your taste,” Tobin rumbles, licking her lips. Christen lifts her head to kiss her, opening her legs so Tobin’s hips align with her. Christen reaches down and guides Tobin’s hand down to her clit, sliding her fingers up and down her wetness.

“Are you sure?” Tobin asks, her tone pure sex.

“Yes, now,” Christen says urgently, moving her hands and digging them into Tobin’s muscled back.

Tobin takes over and slides two fingers into Christen’s slick folds slowly, watching her the entire time.

“Fuck,” Tobin curses, pulling back once, and then sliding her fingers all the way in. “Are you okay?” Tobin asks, her voice sounding strained.

“Yeah, don’t stop.”

“Baby, so fucking wet,” Tobin whispers as she starts to move, thrusting her fingers through Christen. The woman knows what she’s doing, _that’s for damn sure_. Tobin kisses her passionately, and Christen revels in her taste, scent, body. Everything about Tobin draws her in. Tobin adds another finger to the party, picking up the pace. Tobin makes a sound deep in her throat, and Christen’s eyes widen when she feels another orgasm cresting. She’s never come twice before, and she finds herself lifting her hips in rhythm with Tobin’s hand, desperate for more.

“You’re almost there, beautiful, I’m gonna come too, _fuck_,” Tobin says, as Christen reaches to feel Tobin's clit.

“Tobin! Uhhhh, Oh my _fucking- _more, please.. _Baby,_” Christen gasps as the pleasure hits, consuming her. Tobin moans and shudders on top of her now, charging on, while simultaneously sucking on Christen’s nipples.

“Fuck, fuck, fuckk,” Christen says as she finishes, coming all over Tobin’s hand. Christen wastes no time in returning the favor, only taking about a minute off.

“Is this the type of stamina you were talking about? Fuck,” Tobin groans, as Christen turns them over and kisses down Tobin’s perfect body.

“Like you didn’t know,” Christen purrs, looking up to meet Tobin’s eyes. “You ready, baby?”

Tobin comes the second Christen touches her.

****

When they’re both spent, Tobin leans down and tenderly kisses Christen’s forehead, her brow, her nose, and then finally her lips.

“You good?” Tobin asks softly. Christen nods, giving her a sated smile.

“Look at you, swollen lips, sex hair, naked under me. Fucking perfect, Christen. How did I get so lucky?” Tobin whispers. Christen pulls her face down, kissing Tobin on her jaw, over her scar. For once she doesn’t pull away or flinch.

“It was perfect,” Christen tells her, kissing her on the lips.

“So perfect.”

“How many girls have you...?”

“Christen.”

Christen turns pink. “I’m sorry.”

“Never felt as good as with you, Christen. I didn’t even know it could be this good,” Tobin says, leaning her forehead against Christen.

“Flattery will get you everywhere.” Christen kisses her neck, and gasps when she feels Tobin’s nipples getting hard again. “Holy shit.”

“See what you do to me?” Tobin says, her lip curving.

“I can feel it.”

“You were made for me,” Tobin says, rocking her hips.

Christen pushes Tobin’s shoulders as she rolls onto her back for her. “Let’s test that theory, shall we?”

*****

“Weren’t you supposed to go to work?” Christen asks, laughing.

“Shit,” Tobin says, pulling her phone out of the drawer. “Luckily Ash was there.”

“Yeah, and the new girl.”

“Yeah,” Tobin says, giving her a strange look.

“What?”

“Nothing. I’ll go talk to Ry, gimme a sec,” Tobin says, kissing Christen once before leaving. She walks back in a few moments later with two waters, putting one down on the table. The other one she opens and then hands to Christen.

“Thanks.”

“You staying the night?” Tobin asks, looking hopeful.

“Sure. I’ll just text Servando and let him know.”

Tobin smiles with her eyes and a little quirk of her lips.

“You want anything?” Tobin asks, tilting her head.

“Just you.”


	11. "i trust you"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope everyone is staying safe! Sorry for the wait. Enjoy!

After the perfection that was last night, Christen expected to wake up to one of a few different scenarios. Perhaps morning sex, breakfast in bed, or Tobin’s smiling face looming over her. Any of those would have been acceptable. What she didn’t plan to wake up to, was Tobin sitting there, staring at the wall, a pensive look on her face.

“Morning,” Christen says, her voice thick. Tobin glances down at her and gives her a slight smile that doesn’t reach her eyes.

“What’s wrong?” Christen asks, sitting upright.

Tobin rubs her hand down her face and purses her lips. “Don’t worry about it, I’m just being stupid.”

“Tell me.”

“Come here,” Tobin says, moving Christen closer so she’s resting back on her.

“Tobin,” Christen says, letting her tone let Tobin know that she’s serious.

“You want the truth?” Tobin asks.

“No, lie to me, please,” Christen says dryly, rolling her eyes.

“Fuck me,” Tobin mutters.

“What’s wrong?”

“Okay, I’ll tell you, but don’t throw this in my face just for being truthful,” Tobin says, sounding reluctant.

“Fine.”

“I looked through your phone,” Tobin blurts out, holding Christen's body in place so she can’t move away.

Christen's eyes widen. “You looked through my phone? Okay... Um, why?” She asks slowly, more confused than anything. 

“I just, well, I woke up before you and I was just laying here, but your phone kept going off with texts…” 

Christen's eyebrows furrow, letting Tobin know she doesn't understand.

Tobin lets out a slightly annoyed breath of air. "Anyway, I just grabbed your phone to silence it, but the texts were right there and I... I tried to be respectful, I swear, but they were right there and-"

"I get it, Tobin, you didn't mean to look," Christen interjects, getting slightly annoyed herself. "Who were the texts from?"

Tobin observes Christen like she's analyzing her for any misgivings. Like she's trying to conclude if Christen's playing dumb or not. It pisses Christen off.

"Tobin, what is this? Fill in the blank? I have no idea what's going on. Why are your feelings hurt over a text message?"

"My feelings aren't hurt," Tobin immediately strikes back, her eyes going dark.

Christen scoffs. "Really? That's not what it looks like to me."

"Who's Quincy?" Tobin asks in a callous tone.

The words come out of Tobin's mouth and it's like a lightbulb goes off in Christen's head. _Oh, that._

"A friend from home," Christen replies nonchalantly.

Tobin doesn't buy it. "Just a friend?"

"Well, I mean, we dated in high school, but I consider him a friend, so, yes," Christen explains, still confused as to why this would anger Tobin.

"He's your ex, huh? Figures," Tobin says with an attitude.

"Holy shit, Tobin, we dated when we were seventeen! We were kids! What could he have possibly said to make you this pissed off at me?" 

Tobin untangles her legs from Christen's roughly. "He said he missed you and wanted to get together whenever you're back in your hometown."

"Okay, and? We were catching up the other day. I can have friends, Tobin. My whole life isn't just you. Plus, I wouldn't hang out with just Quincy. It'd be in a group with all of our old friends. You're freaking out for no reason."

"No reason?" Tobin laughs once without humor, her voice rising. "Christen, do you remember how you treated me about the whole Allie thing? Was that for no reason, too?"

"What? This is not comparable! Allie was a secret you kept from me! I'm being upfront with you right now."

"Are you, though?" Tobin challenges. "If I had never seen those texts, never had any indication, would you have been upfront with me?"

"If I had an inclination that he was trying to pursue something with me, yes," Christen answers honestly.

"For fuck's sake, Christen, you know we would be having a very different conversation right now if the roles were reversed."

"In what sense?" Christen questions, astounded. "If I had looked through _your_ phone and invaded _your _privacy? Oh, wait, I wouldn't have done that!"

"Bullshit!" Tobin yells, hitting the bed. 

"Maybe I should go through _your_ phone, god only knows the shit _I _would find!" Christen exclaims, getting up from the bed, so she can put enough space as she can between them. For a second, she forgets she doesn't have any clothes on, but she honestly could not care less at this moment. 

“And this is why I don’t have relationships,” Christen hears Tobin say. She instantly spins around and stares her down.

“I’m sorry, what? This doesn’t have to be a relationship, you know,” Christen tells her, crossing her arms over her chest. Tobin’s gaze lowers to Christen's breasts and stays there.

Suddenly the door bursts open and Ryan walks in.

Christen screams.

Ryan yells and then puts her hands over her eyes. “Ryan,” Christen hears Tobin say.

“I... uh... just wanted to say that I made breakfast, you know, when you two are done with your screaming match,” Ryan rambles, still standing there.

“Ryan, you can leave,” Christen says.

“Yeah... Um... Okay.” Ryan finally walks out and closes the door behind her. Christen can hear her hyena laughter echoing down the hall afterward.

“You didn’t lock the door?” Christen asks Tobin, gaping.

“Apparently not.”

Ignoring her, Christen wraps a sheet around herself, grabs her clothes, and walks to the bathroom. She has a quick, hot shower, brushes her teeth with the spare toothbrush in the cabinet, and runs her fingers through her hair so it doesn’t dry knotty. She puts her jeans back on, commando, and her bra and top from last night. She walks into the kitchen, her face flushing when she sees Ryan standing there, grinning.

“I hate you,” Christen grumbles, heading for the stove.

“If you hate me then you don’t get the bacon and eggs,” Ryan says, her tone laced with amusement.

“I’d like to see you try and stop me.” Christen gives her a hard look, taking a plate, and serving herself.

“So you finally gave Tobin a piece, hey,” Ryan says casually, taking a sip of orange juice.

“A piece? Who says that anymore?”

Ryan laughs.

“And how did you know we hadn’t already?” Christen asks, buttering some bread.

“Aren’t you going to toast that?”

“No.”

“Why?”

“Hungry,” Christen says, putting the egg and bacon on the bread and making a tasty looking sandwich.

“Tobin's my twin, there's little I don’t notice,” Ryan says, watching Christen take a bite.

“Have you guys ever fucked the same girl?” Christen asks, wanting to shake Ryan up. Of course, Tobin decides to walk out at that moment, scowling. Christen rolls her eyes.

“Never,” Ryan answers, chuckling. “We have different types.”

“Are you saying I’m not your type?”

Tobin scoffs.

“I think you’re everybody’s type, Christen,” Ryan laughs. 

“Wanna go out sometime?” Christen asks, staring at Ryan. "I'm in search of a new girlfriend."

Ryan laughs harder. “I'll have to get back to you on that," Ryan says, sending a wink in Tobin's direction.

Christen blinks twice and then cracks up laughing. Tobin shakes her head at their antics, but Christen can see the smile on her lips that she can’t stop from forming.

“Nothing is off-limits in this house,” Christen muses, finishing off her breakfast. Tobin walks past her, gently tugging at a lock of her hair, before grabbing a plate and piling it with food.

“If you think you’re going to get away with that as an apology, you have another thing coming, sweetheart,” Christen says, washing her plate and putting it in the dishwasher. She does the same for the other few plates and silverware left in the sink. She spins around to find Tobin leaning against the table, eating a piece of bacon with a smirk etched on her face.

“What’s with the smirk?” Christen asks. She looks around to see that Ryan has left the kitchen.

“You’re fucking hot when you’re angry,” Tobin says, licking her finger.

“The way you act sometimes, you better get used to it.”

“Ditto.”

"Are you still mad?" Christen asks tentatively.

Tobin sighs, pulling Christen in for a hug. "No."

"I'm sorry," Christen whispers against the skin on Tobin's neck.

Tobin pulls back, holding Christen at arm's length. "No, I'm sorry. I overreacted. I should've- you're right, I had no business looking at your phone like that. I'm not even like that. But with you, I- you make me so..." Tobin trails off, struggling to find the words.

"Trust me," Christen laughs lightly. "I know the feeling," she says, looking into Tobin's eyes shyly. 

"I trust you, Christen," Tobin says seriously, gripping Christen's arms tighter. 

Christen doesn't bring her eyes from Tobin's, just lifts her hand to touch the side of Tobin's face, fingers ghosting over her scar. Tobin's eyes flutter shut as she leans her face into Christen's hand, allowing the contact. It's an intimate moment, one that Christen hopes isn't interrupted by Ryan coming back into the kitchen. Tobin's grabbing Christen's one arm holding her with both hands now, breathing evenly. 

This is Tobin being vulnerable. This is Tobin letting Christen know that, although she's scared, she trusts her.

A small smile forms on Christen's face as she reaches forward to press a feather-light kiss to Tobin's lips, her other hand grasping the other side of Tobin's face.

Tobin's eyes slowly open as Christen pulls back.

"Thank you," Tobin says, her voice barely above a whisper.

The moment is so delicate, it almost brings Christen to tears. It's almost like she's falling in-

"You're beautiful," Tobin murmurs, her special smile that Christen loves gracing her angel-like features.

"No, you are, baby," Christen says, placing another kiss to Tobin's lips. Then another kiss to her scar. 

"I'm sorry," Tobin says quickly. "Again, I-"

"Tobin," Christen laughs. "Don't worry about it. I... I trust you, too."

Tobin nods, pressing a gentle kiss to Christen's forehead. 

“I’m, uh, gonna head home,” Christen says, walking past. "I'll see you later." Before she can get out of Tobin's reach, Tobin pulls her back by the belt loop on her jeans. Christen’s back crushes against Tobin’s body, and her heart flutters as Tobin pushes her hair to one side so her neck is bared and vulnerable.

“Last night was perfect, okay? I didn’t mean to ruin it,” Tobin whispers, nuzzling her neck.

“Hmm,” Christen sighs, the memory of last night entering her mind. She almost forgot.

“I’ll make it up to you, I promise,” Tobin says, and then proceeds to whisper exactly what she will do to Christen in her ear.

“All is forgotten!"

Tobin chuckles. “Okay, drive safe and text me when you get home. I’ll pick you up before the fight.” Now that is something Christen forgot about.

“Okay,” Christen says, not sure how she feels about the fight.

“You don’t have faith in your girl?” Tobin asks in disbelief.

“I do. I’ll see you tonight,” Christen says, kissing her on the cheek. Tobin slaps her butt as she passes.

“Excuse me! That's not how you treat a lady," Christen teases.

Tobin lets out a laugh. “My apologies, ma’am.”

Christen puts on a faux serious look, pointing a finger at Tobin. “You’re off the hook this time, girl, but if it happens again, there will be consequences.”

Tobin nods her head in understanding. “Consequences? Sounds interesting. You sure you don’t wanna stay?”

“Can’t always let you get what you want, can I?” Christen winks and turns on her heel, walking swiftly out of the apartment.

*****

Christen walks into the house to find an unhappy-looking Servando standing in the kitchen, his arms crossed against his head.

“What’s wrong?” Christen asks, putting my bag down on the table.

“You weren’t here so I haven’t eaten any breakfast,” he says, sulking.

Christen purses her lips. “What did you do before I moved in?”

“Well, there were usually girls lying about so one of them…”

“You guys are disgusting!"

“Or we had leftover pizza or something,” he says, shrugging.

“Fine, I’ll cook you breakfast but you’re washing up.” She points her finger at him and pulls out some eggs.

Servando hugs her. “Thank you.”

Christen’s heart melts. She doesn’t think she’s ever loved someone like this. “You’re welcome.”

“I need to talk to you about something.” The hesitance in his voice has Christen glancing at him.

“What is it?”

“I was thinking about getting in the ring sometime,” he says.

“You wanna fight?” Christen says, enunciating each word.

“Yeah, I don’t want you to get all upset, but I’m a pretty good fighter, and I wanna do this,” he explains.

“Okay. Why are you telling me this?”

“Dad said I needed to...” he clears his throat. “Run it by you.”

Christen can’t help it when laughter bubbles out of her mouth. “Dad said you needed my permission?” she says through bouts of laughter.

“You done?” Servando growls, not looking impressed.

“Servando. Do I wish you wouldn’t fight? Yes. But it’s your life and I’ll be there for you no matter what.”

He looks at her with a softness in his eyes that makes Christen believe in the saying ‘everything happens for a reason’.

“Right back at ya, sis,” he says. Christen smiles and faces the stove, cracking eggs into the frying pan.

After she finishes Servando’s breakfast, she gets changed, cleans up her room, and then drives to the library. Grabbing her binder, she walks inside and takes her usual table.

“You’re back,” a deep voice says. Christen lifts her head and stare into the eyes of the mysterious guy who sat next to her the last time she was here.

“You stalking me?” Christen teases. His lip curves as he sits opposite her, the same as last time. He pulls out a thick textbook, and Christen reads it upside down.

“You’re studying law?”

“Guilty.”

Christen winces. “Looks painful.”

“Trust me, it is. How about you?” he asks, gesturing to her folder.

“Nursing.” He tilts his head and smiles. Christen returns to her assignment, wanting to get at least a quarter of it finished today. Her phone vibrates and she pulls it out of her pocket to see a text from Tobin. Christen realizes she never texted her saying she was home safe, so she sends a quick reply saying she’s studying at the library.

“Boyfriend?” the stranger asks.

“You're nosy. You ever going to tell me your name?” Christen counters.

He grins cheekily. “John.”

“Nice to meet you, John, I’m Christen, and no, that was my girlfriend, actually.”

“All the good ones really are taken,” he answers, but he doesn’t look let down in the slightest, so Christen knows he’s just teasing. They spend the rest of the time in silence, until it’s time for her to leave.

“Bye, John,” Christen says as she picks up her things.

“Bye, Christen,” he says, not looking up.

By the time she gets home, she has an hour until Tobin comes to pick her up. She jumps into the shower and then walks to her room with dripping wet hair. Wrapping a towel over her head, she stands naked in the corner of her room, staring at her wardrobe. She settles for a pair of high-waisted jeans and a tight black sweater. She puts on her favorite pair of converse, because they're comfortable and flat. She blow-dries her hair and irons it so it’s dead straight. A little mascara, and she's done.

“Christen!” Servando calls through the door.

“Yeah, come in.”

He opens the door, looking excited and dressed casually in jeans and a white T-shirt. “You ready?”

“Yeah,” Christen says, smoothing her hair with her fingers.

“You look fine. Tobin’s on her way,” he says, bouncing on his feet.

“I’m glad someone’s excited,” Christen says as she puts on chapstick. She grabs her phone and slides it into her bra, ready to go. Tobin arrives ten minutes later, not looking her usual self. She looks like Tobin when Christen first met her, tightly wound and brooding.

“You okay?” Christen asks her, wrapping her arms around Tobin’s waist.

“Yeah, I get a little anxious before a fight,” Tobin says, which is understandable, Christen guesses. Servando takes his own car, and Christen jumps into Tobin’s.

“Christen,” says a feminine voice from the back seat. Christen’s head spins around faster than the chick from The Exorcist, as she turns and sees Allie.

“What are you doing here?” Christen asks, surprised.

“I’ve never missed a fight before, you think I’m gonna miss one just because you’re in Tobin’s life?” she says, staring down at her manicured nails. _Fucking Tobin. A little warning would be nice,_ Christen thinks to herself. Tobin slides into the driver’s seat, and obviously feels the tension because she snaps, “Not today, alright.”

The ride is silent and tense, and Christen stares out the window the entire time. _Is she always like this before a fight? If so, I’d rather stay at home. _They arrive at a different location than the last fight, and it looks more crowded this time around. Tobin steps out the car, and walks around to Christen’s door, opening it for her. She’s dressed in a pair of sweats and a hoodie, which Christen assumes will be coming off when she enters the ring.

“You okay?” Christen asks Tobin softly. Allie opens her own car door, huffing about something or the other.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. Just… just stay with your brother, Ryan, and your dad, and stay where I can see you, okay?”

“Okay,” Christen says, clutching her jacket and pulling it tighter.

“I’m serious, Christen, I want you in my line of sight.”

“Okay.”

They walk up to the entrance, and the man standing at the door lets them through, jumping the line. Christen ignores the looks a few of the people give her when Tobin puts her hand on the small of her back and leads her in. When she sees the huge caged octagon, Christen swallows hard. 

Christen looks at Tobin to find her already looking at her, taking in her reaction. Christen attempts a smile but she’s sure it comes out more as a grimace than anything. Tobin takes Christen’s hand in her, threading their fingers together. Christen takes comfort in the gesture. Surprisingly, Allie steps up next to her, flanking her other side.

Christen spots her dad, her brother, Dom, and Ryan standing in a group, talking amongst each other. Tobin squeezes her hand as they approach them. Jack immediately comes over and kisses Christen on the top of her head, and then pulls Tobin aside, for what Christen assumes is a pep talk. Another man walks up and joins them.

“Who’s that?” Christen asks Allie.

“Tobin’s trainer,” she answers. Christen notices her eye Servando, which makes her bristle.

“Don’t even think about it,” Christen says in a sing-song voice, her eyes still on Tobin.

“I’d think you’d be happy, at least I’d back off Tobin,” Allie says.

Christen tilts her head to look at her. “Tobin sees you as a sister. And as I’m sure you know, Servando is my brother.”

_Who I’m not willing to share with you, either._

Christen hears a few cheers so she looks to see what the commotion is about. A tan, muscular girl dressed in athletic shorts and a hoodie, with a bun and headphones on, stands on the other side of them, a small posse surrounding her.

“That’s who Tobin’s fighting?” Christen drawls.

“Yep. Carli Lloyd, in the flesh. She’s badass,” Allie says, nudging Christen with her elbow.

Christen swallows. “And I thought Tobin looked intense.”

Allie shrugs, her attention going back to Servando. _Yeah, like that’s gonna happen. _“Oh, look. Your real competition's here. Haven’t seen her here in a long ass time,” Allie says sweetly, looking out into the crowd.

“What?” Christen has no idea what she’s talking about.

“Hey, sis, you ready?” Servando asks as he steps up next to Christen. Dom comes up behind her and wraps his arms around her.

“Ready as I’ll ever be. Hey, Dom.”

“Hey. You smell good,” Dom says, sniffing her again.

“Hey, Ry.”

“Hey, Chris, come stand next to me, and don’t move, okay?” Ryan says, looking serious. Her lips are pursed and stare unwavering.

Christen grins. “Did Tobin threaten you?”

“She needs to be focused so we needa do our part on this end,” Ryan says.

“Well, don’t worry about me, I’m not going anywhere,” Christen says as she stares out at the crowd. The warehouse is filling up with even more people, and she starts to feel a little anxious. She sees Tobin approach and runs into her arms.

“Christen,” Tobin murmurs, and Christen can hear the smile in her voice.

“You gotta head up there, Tobin,” Ryan says, rubbing the back of her neck. Tobin nods sharply, and takes a step back so she can remove her hoodie. Underneath is a matching black sports bra and spandex set from Nike, which Tobin pulls off incredibly well. _No wonder people pay so much money to watch these fights. _Tobin gets her tape job done, smiling up at Christen once she's done and been cleared and checked out by the medical staff.

“Plenty of time for that later, Christen,” Tobin says, amused at her obvious ogling.

“Looking forward to it.”

“Stay-"

“With Ryan, I get it. I’ll be right here, okay. Just concentrate on the fight.”

“That’s my girl,” Tobin says approvingly, giving Christen a quick kiss before she heads to the center of the Octagon. A man introduces Tobin and her opponent, which is met with alternate cheers and boos. Christen starts to wring her hands as she watches them both warm up a little, jumping up and down and stretching.

“She’s gonna be fine,” Ryan says.

“Christen, stop fidgeting,” Allie says. She looks calm and collected, then again, she’s been coming to fights with Tobin since she started this whole thing. Jack and Servando move in even closer, close enough that they can talk to Tobin if need be. Christen’s happier being further back. She sees Dom shifting on his feet, anticipating what’s to come, and Ryan’s intense gaze on her sister. Christen looks back to see Tobin and her opponent face one another, as the referee stands between them, talking. After a few moments of this, he knocks their gloves against each other twice and they both take a step back.

Then it begins.

The cheers are so loud that Christen winces, trying to block them out. As she catches a glimpse of Tobin’s expression, Christen can tell she’s in the zone. Her face is blank, and her eyes are hard, calculating. Apparently that doesn’t stop her gaze from darting to where Christen’s standing, if only for a second. Ryan curses when she sees it, and takes a step closer to Christen so she’s directly behind her. Christen knows Ryan doesn’t want Tobin to worry, even though she thinks they're all overreacting. Christen walked through the last fight, alone and in a pair of stilettos and she managed just fine.

Lost in her thoughts, Christen doesn’t even pay attention to the fight, and a sudden cheer makes her snap to attention. Tobin throws a punch to Carli’s head, and Christen turns to look at Ryan. Ryan grabs her shoulders and spins her back so she’s watching the fight. Tobin and her opponent are now hugging each other, or at least that’s what it looks like to Christen. Tobin brings up her knee with force and throws a few more punches. _How long does this go for, exactly? _When Carli gets in a kick to Tobin’s stomach, Christen reaches back for Ryan’s hand and digs her nails into her palm. Ryan brings her closer, and puts her arm on Christen’s shoulder.

Christen looks around for a few seconds, watching people cheering, screaming, and jumping up and down. They're all so excited, so bloodthirsty, when all she wants to do is cry. She looks back just in time to see Tobin take her down to the floor, and she hears Ryan say something about a takedown. Tobin practically straddles her opponent and pounds into her face. When Christen sees blood flowing from the other girl’s mouth, she starts to feel a little nauseous. She faces Ryan, not wanting to watch anymore.

“It’s almost over,” Ryan says, putting her hands on her shoulders.

_Well, thank goodness for that._

What feels like thirty minutes later, the cheering turns to roars and they hail Tobin the winner. Jack runs up to Tobin, and checks her over for any injuries. Ryan leads Christen closer as Tobin exits the Octagon. Forcing her feet to move, Christen watches Tobin’s every step until she reaches her. Christen lifts her hand to Tobin’s cheek, frowning at the cut on her eyebrow. A few drops of blood drip down, but other than that she doesn’t look too banged up. Tobin’s chest heaves with her heavy breathing and Christen puts her hand over her heart.

“Hey,” Christen says.

Tobin’s lip twitches. “Hey, beautiful.”

“Let’s take you to a doctor.”

“No need, I’m fine.”

“Your eyebrow!”

“You’re gonna be a nurse, you can stitch it up,” Tobin says, grinning. She smells like sweat mixed with perfume. Surprisingly, it doesn’t smell bad at all.

“I’m still on the theory work!” Christen says, her voice going a little higher. _No way could I stitch that up._

Tobin chuckles at the look on her face.

“Tobin!” Christen hears Jack call. “Doc will stitch you up.”

“Who’s your Doc?” Christen asks, looking around.

Tobin winces. “Not one. Doctors we have on call for the fights. Why don’t you go wait with Ryan and I’ll meet you out front?”

“Nice fight, Tobin,” Allie says, walking up to them.

Tobin nods. “Almost there.”

“Almost there,” she whispers back, exhaling deeply.

“I’m gonna get a doc to fix me up,” Tobin says, kissing Christen on the cheek. She gives Allie an undecipherable look as she walks off. Allie is scowling, her eyes following Tobin.

“What is it?” Christen asks her, knowing something is up.

“Nothing,” Allie says shortly. “Come on, let’s go.”

“Christen! Let’s go!” Servando calls out. Christen follows the group outside, wondering what the hell is going on right now.

“You coming home with me?” Servando asks.

“No, I’ll wait for Tobin with Allie,” Christen says.

“Ryan, you waiting here with them?” Servando asks.

“Of course,” Ryan replies, a scowl appearing on her beautiful face.

“Okay, I’ll see you at home then,” he says, kissing Christen on the cheek. “Look after her. Precious cargo right here,” Servando says before walking to his car.

Christen can see Jack smiling, looking proud. She rolls her eyes.

“Dad, come over tomorrow for dinner,” Christen says when he comes over to say bye.

“What are you cooking?” he asks, his eyes flaring with interest.

“Whatever you want,” Christen replies, smiling.

“You know me, I’ll always want meat and potatoes.”

“Meat and potatoes it is.”

“See you tomorrow, baby girl,” he says, pulling her in for a warm hug. Christen turns to see Allie watching them interact, a wistful look on her face.

“I better be invited,” Ryan adds, leaning on her car.

“Of course you are. Allie, you can come too,” Christen says. She’s not so bad after all when she tones down the melodramatics. Allie looks surprised at the invite, hell, Christen surprised herself.

Christen looks up from her phone, seeing Tobin walk out towards them. Her steps are hurried, and she can see her fists are clenched. _What the hell happened? _Tobin pins her with her gaze, now close enough that Christen can see her eyes. They soften as they rest on her. “Let’s go home, babe.”

“What happened?” Christen demands.

“Nothing,” Tobin lies. Christen knows she lies because she looks away as she says nothing, not maintaining eye contact.

“What. The. Fuck?” Christen growls when she notices that Tobin has red lipstick stains on her neck. She’s wearing a hoodie again, but they still don’t completely hide them. Christen ignores Tobin, her heart shattering, and walks over to Ryan’s car, getting into the passenger seat. She’s not going home with Tobin.

“Christen…” Tobin calls out, stalking to the car. Christen locks the door. Ryan sticks her head in the driver’s side, looking confused.

“Will you take me home?” Christen asks her, her voice breaking. Ryan immediately hops into the car, and closes the door, pressing the central lock so Tobin can’t get in.

“What’s wrong?” Ryan asks, looking baffled.

“What’s wrong?” Christen repeats, sounding a little hysterical.

“Calm down, Christen,” Ryan demands.

Tobin stands next to the window and knocks on it. “Open the door, Christen,” she says, sounding a little frantic.

“Tobin has fucking lipstick all over her neck!” Christen says to Ryan, turning her back on Tobin so she can’t see her.

“Tobin would never cheat on you,” Ryan says confidently, trying to placate her.

“Yeah, so some girl’s lips just fell on her neck?” Christen can hear Allie and Tobin talking to each other in heated tones.

“Why don’t you just ask her? I’m sure there’s an explanation.”

“You driving me, or should I call a cab?” Christen asks, her voice low.

“Fuck,” Ryan curses. She gets out of the car and says something quietly to Tobin. Tobin pushes Ryan out of the way and hops into the driver’s seat.

“For fuck's sake, Christen, I didn’t kiss anyone,” Tobin says, anger and worry flashing in her eyes.

“I’m pretty sure that speaks for itself,” Christen says, looking straight ahead.

“Christen, look. She wanted me, she tried. I told her I was with you, and it was serious.”

“That seems to be a common occurrence for you, right? Girls jumping at you while you remain the innocent victim,” Christen spits. "God, we _just_ talked about this."

Tobin rubs her hands down her face in frustration.

“Who was she?” Christen asks through clenched teeth.

“The doctor. She’s kind of my ex. The one I broke up with just after Mikey died,” Tobin says. Her voice is low and sad, but Christen can’t deal with both Tobin’s pain and her own right now.

“So, you failed to mention that the doctor was your ex, your serious ex,” Christen says, hurt and confused.

“I haven’t seen her at one of these fights in a long ass time. This is the first one she’s been at since Mikey. I didn’t expect her to be here,” Tobin explains, her gaze locked with Christen’s. “Look, I have a lot of baggage in my life. I don’t wanna scare you away with all this shit. I want you to be happy, Christen, not have to worry about all this drama in my life. You’re a good girl, you don’t need to be around this shit. I wanted to keep you away from it, separate. So yes, I left a few things out,” she admits.

“Why did you break up?”

Tobin clears her throat. “Mikey died, she was the doctor at the fight.”

_And she couldn’t save him. Surely Tobin didn’t blame her for that?_

“That wasn’t her fault,” Christen says quietly.

“I know that. I just pushed her away after that. We weren’t meant to be together anyway.”

“How do you know that?”

“Whatever we had, it wasn't there anymore. When things got really shitty, I didn't care enough to fix things. I knew she wasn't the one after that.”

Christen looks out the window, wanting a break from the conversation, to see Ryan and Allie have left in Tobin’s car. She didn’t even hear the car drive off.

“Why is she still in there?” Christen asks, gesturing to the warehouse.

“There’s another fight going on.”

_Well, that explains all the cars still in the parking lot._

“Can you take me home, please?” Christen looks at her and sees that Tobin’s eyebrow is nicely stitched. Christen’s gaze drops to her neck, where she's attempted to scrub off the lipstick but there are still smears of it where she missed a spot.

“Okay. Were you okay during the fight?” Christen can tell Tobin’s treading very carefully, trying not to get her upset.

“Ryan looked after me,” is all Christen says. She looks at Tobin’s knuckles on the steering wheel, which are red and swollen.

“Will you come home with me?” Tobin asks, sounding unsure.

“I think I’ll just go home,” Christen replies, shifting in her seat.

“You know I need to be near you after a fight,” Tobin says, her voice pleading.

“Why don’t you stay at mine?” Christen offers.

Tobin exhales in relief and nods twice. “Okay.” She rests her hand on Christen’s thigh, her long fingers spread out.

“I’ll stop by mine and grab some clothes,” Tobin says.

“You sure you’re okay to drive?” Christen asks. She’s pretty sure she saw her take a few kicks to the stomach.

“I’m good.”

When they arrive at the apartment Tobin parks and runs inside to get some clothes while Christen waits in the car. She drums her fingers on her thigh, thinking over everything that she’d learned tonight. She doesn’t expect Tobin to come without a past, without her own baggage, but this is getting a little ridiculous. One question is foremost in Christen’s mind.

_What else is Tobin Heath hiding?_

_And does it matter? As long as she’s good to me, and faithful, can I take any curveball thrown my way? _

Tobin enters the car, pulling Christen from her thoughts.

“You okay?” Tobin asks, her hand on the keys.

“I’m fine,” Christen says a little shortly.

“Right.” Tobin turns the key and starts the engine. She runs her other hand along her scar, looking like she wants to say something.

“I need to know you’re in this with me, no matter what. I know I’m gonna fuck up sometimes, but I’ll always try and fix things. I’ll never hurt you intentionally, Christen. I just need to know you aren’t gonna run. You can’t run,” Tobin says.

“Where am I gonna run to?”

Tobin’s eyes dart to hers before she replies. “You know what I mean. If something happens you can’t handle, you’re gonna want to run from my bed, from me.”

“Tobin-”

“I just need to know if you want this as much as I do,” Tobin says. _And there it is, the question I was just asking myself._

Apparently Christen takes too long to answer.

“I see,” Tobin grinds out.

“Tobin-”

Tobin makes a dismissive sound in her throat, and keeps her eyes on the road.

“Are you going to listen to me? Or just be a brat?” Christen snaps, losing her patience.

Tobin doesn’t reply, her jaw set.

“I want you. But you need to let me in more. Do you think I like finding out all of this shit from other people? Or from the lipstick on your neck? Just like this morning, how would you feel if this situation was reversed?"

Christen ignores the groan that escapes Tobin’s lips and continues. “My point exactly.”

“Tell me about your exes,” Tobin demands.

“Well, there are very few. I dated Isaac for a few months, he was my first boyfriend. Then I dated Quincy for nearly a year. Then I dated this girl, Cameryn, for a bit. We ended things a couple of months before I moved here.”

"Were you in love with any of them?"

"Isaac and Quincy? Hell no. With Cameryn, things were different for sure, but- I don't know. Looking back, it wasn't what I thought it was."

“Where can I find this Cameryn?” Tobin asks in a suspiciously calm tone.

“Tobin,” Christen says, trying not to laugh but failing.

“What?” Tobin shrugs.

“So, this is the first time we’re gonna make love after a fight,” Christen says huskily, changing the subject.

“Who says that’s what we’re gonna do tonight?” Tobin asks, playing coy.

Christen sighs dramatically. “I thought I was in for a treat tonight, my girl winning her fight, adrenaline pumping through her body…” she trails off.

Tobin grins widely, showing her straight white teeth. “Be careful what you wish for, baby.”

“Why? Cuz I just might get it?” Christen bats her eyelashes.

“Just hope you can handle it,” Tobin teases, her lips curving into a crooked grin.

“Oh, I can handle it,” Christen scoffs, leaning over slightly and running her hand up Tobin’s thigh.

Tobin shakes her head, and as she parks in front of the house, Christen can feel the anticipation building. Tobin walks around the car and Christen steps out and stares at her beautiful face. A little battered, but beautiful all the same. Christen smiles and puts her hand out, which Tobin takes. Hand in hand, they walk to the front door. Before Christen can even open the door, Servando pulls the door open, grinning when he sees them.

“I was wondering what the hell happened to you two, I just called Ryan,” he says, stepping back for them to enter.

“You okay?” he asks Tobin, giving her a once over.

“Yeah, I’m good,” Tobin answers, slapping hands with him.

Christen pulls Tobin towards her room. “Night, bro!” She calls out.

“Night. I’m heading out,” he says.

Christen spins around. “Where are you going?” He just smiles cheekily and walks out. He locks the door behind him.

“Stop fussing over him,” Tobin says, grabbing her ass.

“I don’t fuss over him,” Christen lies.

“I’m gonna take a shower,” Tobin says, pulling off her hoodie. Christen doesn't miss her wince, and she knows that Tobin’s in pain, no matter how much she tries to deny it.

“Wanna join me?” Tobin asks in a low voice.

“You sure you’re up for that?” Christen asks.

Tobin rolls her eyes. “I think so.”

“I meant, are you sure you’re not in too much pain?”

“I will be, if you don’t take care of it,” Tobin says, stifling a smile. She pulls off her top and bra, and then her shorts, standing before Christen.

Christen sighs as she stares at her body.

Sexiest thing she’s ever seen. _Who knew such perfection existed in real life? In books, maybe. Or in movies. But in real life?_

“You gonna stare at me all day, or you gonna get naked and join me?”

Christen bites her bottom lip and starts to undress. Once she’s fully naked, Tobin stalks towards her and bends at her waist, gripping Christen’s hips and throwing her over her shoulder.

“Be careful, Tobin!” Christen pleads.

“I’m fine, Christen,” Tobin says, carrying her to the bathroom. _Yeah, she is._

Tobin puts her down on her feet. Turning on the shower, she tests the temperature first, before guiding Christen in. Christen moans as the warm water hits her body, and at the promising look in Tobin’s eyes. Christen stands up on her toes and kisses her slowly, a sensual tease. Tobin’s tongue darts inside her lips, deepening the kiss as her hands roam Christen’s body. When Tobin’s thumb swipes over her nipple, Christen’s body jerks in pleasure.

“I want you,” Tobin growls, pulling her mouth from Christen’s.

“You have me.”

Tobin pins her against the wall and Christen wraps her arms around her neck. “You sure you’re okay?”

“Never better,” Tobin says before her mouth is on Christen again.

“Fuck,” Christen gasps as Tobin pulls her lips away, only to move them to her earlobe, nibbling. Tobin moves a hand down between them, and strokes Christen gently. She makes a husky sound in her throat when she feels just how ready Christen is for her.

_Best. Shower. Ever._


	12. "i'm in love with her"

“That’s fourteen dollars, thanks,” Christen tells the gentleman she’s serving. He hands her a twenty and she gives him his change.

“Finally slowed down,” Ash says, coming up next to her. They had a two-hour-long rush, the place was packed.

“Yeah. You can go have a smoke break, if you want,” Christen offers, knowing she must be dying for one right about now.

“So, dating the boss and giving out orders, huh,” Ash teases, her eyes playful.

“What?! Ash, I was just saying…”

Ash chuckles, pulls out a pack of cigarettes from the pocket of her jeans and heads outside. 

“Quit staring at my ass, Christen!” She calls out, not even turning around. 

"Do you have eyes in the back of your head or something?" Christen yells back, laughing.

Christen’s just finishing cleaning up the bar when Allie walks in. Christen does a double-take when Allie walks behind the bar and starts grinning at her knowingly.

“You’re the new employee?” Christen asks, her eyes flaring.

Allie laughs. “Yeah, and please don’t be mad. I need this job.”

Christen lifts her shoulder in a shrug. “Tone down your crazy. I’m sure we’ll get along fine.”

“Consider it toned down. What happened the other night after the fight?” Allie asks.

“Someone’s nosy,” Christen huffs, cutting up some lime for the tequila shots.

“No, seriously.”

“We fought, we made up. I had no idea the doc was her ex. I didn’t even see what she looked like.”

Allie gives her a head to toe once over. “You’re way hotter than her. In my opinion, anyway.”

Christen rolls her eyes.

“No, I’m serious. I’ve heard like, everyone, talk about how hot you are.”

“Are we bonding over the mutual dislike for Tobin’s ex?” Christen asks, stifling a laugh.

She grins evilly. “Yeah, I think we are.”

Allie looks cute today, her blonde hair is tied up in a high ponytail and her makeup consists of lip gloss and mascara. Her tight jeans and black top show off her slender figure.

“Were you just checking me out?” Allie teases.

“Wow, what did I miss?” Ash says, wiggling her eyebrows at them.

“How come no one told me Allie was the new girl?” Christen asks, looking at each of them.

“I thought you knew,” Ash says with a shrug. “Ryan hired her. Where’s your girlfriend today?”

“At the gym with Servando and dad.”

“When’s the next fight?” Ash asks.

“No idea.” Christen looks at Allie expectantly.

“Hey, I don’t know either. You should ask your dad,” she says.

Christen pulls her phone out of her pocket and calls Ryan.

“Hey, Chris,” Ryan answers.

“Are we still doing dinner?” Christen asks, hoping she says yes.

“Yeah, I’ll be there in an hour.”

“Okay.”

“Bye.”

They both hang up.

“You’re going out to dinner with Ryan?” Allie asks, her eyebrows rising.

Christen frowns. “Yeah, why not?”

“Isn’t it weird?” she asks, pursing her pink lips.

“Ryan’s my best friend.” 

“What does Tobin say?” Allie asks, leaning against the bar.

“Tobin knows Ryan and I are close.” She acts like they annoy her but Christen knows she’s happy they get along so well.

Allie makes a noncommittal sound which just pisses Christen off. She’s about to tell her as much when a group of customers walk in.

An hour passes quickly, and soon Ryan walks in to pick her up.

“You ready, hot stuff?”

“Yeah, give me a minute.” Christen walks to the staff bathroom and changes clothes, then reapplies some makeup. She sprays herself with perfume, and she’s good to go.

“Okay, let’s go,” Christen says as she walks out, her bag in hand. She says bye to Ash and Allie, and walks out side by side with Ryan.

Ryan pulls out of the parking lot. “What do you feel like eating?”

“Creamy chicken and mashed potatoes,” Christen answers instantly.

Ryan chuckles. “I know just the place.”

“So, what’s new with you?”

“Nothing, same old. Work hard, play hard.”

“We all know you play hard. I was at your place the other night,” Christen teases.

“Oh, like you’re all innocent. Oh, Tobin! Tobin!” Ryan imitates, causing Christen to burst out laughing, her face turning a little red.

“Are you blushing? You’re the only girl I know that still blushes.”

“Yeah, right!”

“I’m serious. Most girls are forward these days, they don’t blush or get shy.”

“Maybe the women you hang around.”

“What does that mean?”

“Maybe you should try meeting girls somewhere different. In a library, perhaps. I assure you the women who frequent there would probably be blushers.”

“Stereotype,” Ryan says in a sing-song voice.

Christen rolls her eyes. “Maybe so, why don’t we put that to the test sometime?”

“You’re on. What did I do with my time before you moved here?” Ryan asks playfully.

“Have more sex?”

Ryan thinks it over. “You’re probably right. And try to keep an eye on Tobin, but now you’re here for that.”

“Ha!”

“I think you’re the only person she will listen to.”

“I think you’re exaggerating,” Christen replies.

“Oh, please. She’s so whipped,” Ryan says, then commences to make whipping noises.

“Mature, Ryan,” Christen says, shaking her head and smiling.

“Seriously though, you’re good for her, Chris. I’m happy you’re here,” Ryan says in a gentle voice.

“I can’t handle your sweetness, Ryan,” Christen says, looking out the window.

“Don’t get all soft on me,” Ryan says, chuckling.

“Aaand you’re back.”

“We’re here, come on.” Ryan says, getting out of the car. Christen hops out and walks around to meet her.

“You didn’t tell me you hired Allie,” Christen says after they order their food and drinks.

“I’m sure I did,” Ryan says, looking around the restaurant.

“Scared of my reaction, Ryan Heath?”

Ryan’s eyes snap to her and narrow. “I had to hire her. She needed the money and she was my brother’s girl. In a weird way, she's almost like a link to him. She was supposed to be family one day. Was I a little worried about how you would react? Maybe,” she admits. “But it was also kinda fun, waiting to see what you'd do.”

“I don’t mind Allie, and it’s your bar, you can hire who you want.”

“Yeah, but I was hoping you would think Tobin hired her, not me.”

“You’re evil.”

“There’s always an evil twin,” Ryan says in a creepy voice.

“Two in some families,” Christen teases, poking her tongue out.

“Who’s the beautiful lady, Ry?” comes a deep voice. Christen looks up into the face of a muscular man with reddish hair and green eyes. He has a goatee and a slightly crooked nose.

“None of your fucking business. Leave,” Ryan demands, her voice dangerously low.

“I saw you at the fight. Thought you were with the better half, though," he says, obviously referring to Tobin. "It's nice to see young love,” he coos obnoxiously, glancing back and forth between both Christen and Ryan. 

Christen sits up straighter in her seat, rolling her eyes. She knows the reaction he's looking for, but he sure as hell isn't going to get it from her.

“My fighter is up next against Tobin,” he says, sounding thrilled. 

“Get out of here, before you regret it,” Ryan spits out. Her hands clench on the table, and her jaw is set stubbornly.

“Always wanting what you can't have huh Ryan?” He says, eyeing Christen.

This gets Ryan fired up. "You better watch your fucking mouth before-"

“Ryan,” Christen says, her eyes pleading with her. A guy calls out “Frank” and the sasquatch retreats, his smug chuckles permeating the restaurant.

“Stupid fuck,” Ryan curses.

“Don’t let him get to you. Let’s try to enjoy our meal, okay?”

“It wasn't me I was worried about,” Ryan states cryptically. 

“Is that who Servando got into a fight with?”

“Not the same guys, but other camps of fighters who have fought or are going to fight Tobin. There are some good girls who fight, no drama. But then there are some with crews like those, who go looking for fights and drama everywhere they go.”

“He was scary,” Christen admits.

Ryan scowls. “Hardly. That guy's all talk.”

“That much is obvious. He just looked like a serial killer.”

Their food arrives and they wait quietly as the workers place down their plates.

“Thank you,” Ryan and Christen both say to the waitress at the same time.

“Shit, maybe we are seeing too much of each other,” Ryan jokes, lightening the mood.

“Cuz we're both polite?”

“Cuz we're speaking at the same time. Even Tobin and I don’t do that, and we’re twins.”

“Sexy twins,” Christen corrects.

Ryan grins. “You’re so good for my ego, Chris.”

“Trust me, your ego doesn’t need any stroking, Ryan.” Christen eyes her food. “I want a bite.”

“Of course you do,” Ryan says dryly.

“What you’re like Joey from Friends now, you don’t share food?”

“Friends.” Ryan chuckles. “We should watch that tonight.”

“Let’s. We should take home dinner for Tobin, too.”

Ryan gives Christen a taste of her steak and Christen gives Ryan a bite of her chicken. They finish up and then head back to their apartment, with a shitload of food for Tobin. Christen wonders if she’s even home yet. What she doesn’t expect to see, as they walk up the stairs to the front door, is a woman standing there. Dark brown hair and tan skin. Christen can’t tell the color of her eyes from where she’s standing, but she instantly recognizes her as the woman from the bar.

“What are you doing here?” Ryan growls from behind Christen.

“I need to talk to Tobin,” she says in a stern tone.

“Tobin’s moved on, Mia, you need to let her go,” Ryan says, nothing gentle in her tone. Ryan walks around her, her hand on Christen’s wrist, pulling her closer. While Ryan unlocks the door, Christen’s gaze can’t help but be glued to Tobin’s past, she never got a good look at her the first time around. She’s a lot older than her, that much Christen can tell. She must be in her thirties, so older than Tobin, too. Ryan shuffles Christen into the house, hesitating with her hand on the door. She’s still standing there, and Ryan clearly doesn’t want to just shut the door in her face. She looks at Christen and shrugs her shoulder.

“We can’t just leave her standing there,” Christen whispers.

Ryan looks at her quizzically. “You’re one of a kind, Christen Press.”

“Why?”

“Other women would throw her down the stairs then slam the door shut in her face.”

“Great, now I’m thinking about it.”

Ryan gives her a belly laugh. They’re both saved from making any decisions about letting her in when they hear Tobin’s voice.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” she growls, and Christen cringes, because her tone is downright hostile.

“I wanted to talk to you,” Mia says, sounding a little unsure. Ryan and Christen share a glance before they shuffle against the wall so no one can see them standing here listening. They’re terrible, Christen knows, but she could care less right now. Tobin isn’t much of a sharer of information.

“We have nothing to talk about, I told you the other night.”

“Tobin, I want you back.”

Tobin sighs like she’s put out. “And I told you that isn’t gonna happen. I’m in love with her, Mia. Nothing’s going to change that.”

Wait, what? In love? Christen glances at Ryan, wide-eyed, who is smiling her megawatt smile.

“You love her?” Mia says, her voice breaking.

“Yeah, I do.”

“Really? Her?” Christen opens her mouth, but Ryan pinches her, reminding her where they are.

“Yes, really. You need to go, Mia. I’m sorry, but don’t come back. I have a good thing right now. I've moved on. You should... you should, too.”

Christen doesn’t catch what Mia says in response, just hears the sound of feet shuffling.

“We’re done, Mia. Please go home, alright?” Tobin says, her voice softening a little. Christen hears Mia’s heels clicking away. Ryan grabs Christen’s arm to pull her away from the door, but then they hear Tobin speak.

“Enjoy the show?” Tobin says. Luckily she sounds amused, not angry. She walks in and wraps Christen in her arms, placing her face in the crook of Christen’s neck and shoulder.

“Missed you today, baby,” Tobin says, reigning kisses on Christen’s neck. She pulls back and kisses her gently on the mouth.

“Did you miss me?” Ryan asks, grinning.

“No,” Tobin answers playfully. “You two are trouble together, I swear,” she says, shaking her head at them.

Ryan takes the plastic bag filled with food and puts it on the table. “Brought you dinner.”

“Thanks, Ry.”

“Thank our girlfriend,” Ryan answers mischievously, winking at Christen who laughs in reply.

“I plan to,” Tobin says, fusing her lips to Christen’s.

“Get a room!” Ryan calls out, heading into her own room.

“Ryan, don’t come out of your room,” Tobin tells her and walks Christen backward to the couch.

“Wait, what are you doing?” Christen asks, sounding panicked. Tobin smiles and sits her down. She removes Christen’s shoes and then pulls off her jeans.

“I need to taste you, now,” Tobin says, the urgency evident in her breathy tone.

“Tobin-” Tobin kisses her, halting any objections. Taking her jeans and underwear off, Tobin kisses Christen until she’s breathless. Oxygen is trivial, all Christen needs is Tobin’s kisses to survive. When Tobin pulls away to kiss down her neck, Christen’s panting. With no warning, Tobin lowers her head and attaches her mouth to Christen’s center, her tongue darting inside.

Christen screams, not even caring that Ryan can hear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone!! I am so sorry for the delay. A lot has been happening over the last few months in my life. I don't put any personal information on here normally, but I am newly engaged. It's been a light of happiness amongst some pretty hard times, but I'm over the moon and so in love. He is everything I have ever wanted and more. If someone had told me eight months ago I would be engaged, I would've laughed right in their face. Sometimes life has a funny way of putting you through heartbreak in order to find the person you've been searching for all along. Everything has happened so quickly, but I could not be happier. Work, personal life, and cohabitating with someone new has been the reason behind this hiatus, but don't worry, I have not forgotten about this story!  
I know the past few months have been dark for so many people, but I hope this chapter gives you a reason to smile.   
PS- Don't forget to vote!!!!!!!!!!!!! Black Lives Matter!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Author's Note:**

> feedback/positive comments are appreciated. it motivates me to write more.


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